


One Lifetime Is Not Enough

by RainbowBuddy



Category: The Owl House (Cartoon)
Genre: Aging, Bittersweet, Dancing, Dementia, F/F, First fic in ... 5 years?, Future Fic, Grief, How Do I Tag, Hurt/Comfort, It's kind of the point of this fic, Kisses and Cuddles, Let's go backwards, Making Out, Melancholy, No Smut, Please don't fear the Death tag, Suggestive language, What is writing?, families, implied sex, now with art, there's some fluff i promise, weddings and funerals
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-09
Updated: 2021-02-04
Packaged: 2021-03-09 07:14:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 14
Words: 49,986
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27467041
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RainbowBuddy/pseuds/RainbowBuddy
Summary: “Grief is not a disorder, a disease or a sign of weakness. It is an emotional, physical and spiritual necessity, the price you pay for love. The only cure for grief is to grieve.”- Earl GrollmanGrief is the lingering pain of memories, of something beautiful lived in full. But all things must end. It is the melancholy of moments lost to the auspices of time. It is the bittersweet tang of knowing all of it - the pain and anguish, the joy and laughter, the tears and the kisses and the love - all of it is gone.Is it better to have loved and lost?Amity thinks so.The memories are worth it.
Relationships: Amity Blight & Willow Park, Amity Blight/Luz Noceda
Comments: 171
Kudos: 240





	1. The Woman in the Mirror

**Author's Note:**

> So it's been a hot minute (or five... years) since I've even really engaged in the world of fanfics. But She-Ra sucked me back into reading fics and The Owl House grabbed my attention enough to try writing again.
> 
> A BIG thanks to Maxrimus for listening to me yell about this one shot turned multi-fic idea I had and for taking the time to proof-read it. If you haven't yet, go check out his [awesome work](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maxrimus/pseuds/Maxrimus)!

**92**

Soft sunlight filters through stained glass. Dust motes dance in the air, floating over piles of boxes and old furniture covered with blankets and sheets. A sudden bang disturbs the silence, and dust billows as a trapdoor flies open and a witch emerges. She coughs and waves her hand to disperse the dust.

Wide golden eyes narrow and she sighs as she surveys the clutter. Carefully, she picks her way around the piles. She idly flips the lid open on one box and then another, glancing in at its contents. Clearly, she has not yet found what she seeks.

With a grunt, she lifts one heavy box to look underneath it, and her foot tangles in something as she steps back to place the box down. Her breath expels in a loud ‘huff’ as she tumbles to the floor. The box lands painfully on top of her, its contents clattering about her loudly.

A familiar voice calls from below in alarm. “Is everything okay up there?”

“I’m okay!” Amity calls back. She takes a moment to compose herself before lifting the box off of her torso. She scrambles to her feet and stretches, cracking her back. Wincing, she lifts her shirt slightly to peer at her skin, checking for bruises. A light purple blooms across her side, drifting up to brush against her ribs. Holding her breath, she casts a small healing spell on herself and straightens as the pain immediately lessens. 

Slowly she bends to pick up the dropped items and as she stands erect, her eyes meet a pair of familiar golden eyes. She startles, almost dropping the box again. Then she smiles wryly, chuckles, and carefully sets the box aside. With a flourish, she pulls the white sheet her foot had become tangled in completely off the mirror. Folding it carelessly, she tosses it over the box.

Amity returns her attention to the mirror and leaps into the air as glowing eyes glint behind her from the gloom. She whirls, a spell circle forming instinctively before leaving it incomplete, fizzling out and uncast.

An unmoving face gazes back at her from the darkness. A face she knows all too well. Summoning a flame, she turns her back on the face as her fire flickers, casting a pink glow about the room. She studies her rose-tinted face in the mirror. Behind her, the face, the memory she was avoiding, looms out of the huge framed painting.

The Amity in the mirror is older, wiser… sadder than the young woman in the painting. Mirror-Amity’s face is still free of wrinkles, but a touch of silver traces gracefully through her long bronze hair. She gazes sadly, longingly at her younger self. She raises a curious hand to toy with a long silken strand of hair; she had forgotten how short she used to wear it back then.

The woman gazing back at her from the mirror is all alone up here, she so rarely is these days, so she lets herself linger in her melancholy. She holds it close to her, savouring it, cherishing it like an old friend.

Slowly, she lowers herself to the floor in front of the mirror and hugs her knees to her chest. As she does, the rest of the painting comes into view.

And she sees that smile.

She hasn’t seen that smile in years, decades even. Amity can’t help the sad smile that reluctantly tugs at her lips when she sees that smile. She never could resist it.

Luz looks back at her, an easy smile gracing her face as she gazes out of the picture frame. Her arm is draped proudly, almost possessively, around the witch standing beside her. A young Amity is gazing lovingly up at Luz and the Amity in the mirror blushes slightly as she feels the same lovesick expression flicker across her own face.

A baby is swaddled in a cream blanket in Amity’s arms. Luxurious brown curls frame big dark eyes peering out of a small tan face. A tiny fist curls delicately into the fabric of Amity’s shirt. 

Suddenly a loud clatter on the stairs makes the Amity in the mirror jump.

The voice is muffled. “....amity? Are you up here?”

And because Amity is weak right now, because the past is flooding back to her, her heart stutters at the sight of the child before her. The pink flame held aloft in Amity’s hand casts a soft glow across the girl’s tan skin and bronze hair and her face… it’s Luz’s face. Or so close to it that it makes Amity’s heart ache.

“There you are!” The six-year-old chirrups, “Mami was looking for you…” her voice trails away and she gasps. Amity glances back in the mirror and notices, for the first time, a blazing trail of tears running down her face.

“Camille,” she sighs, “come sit with me, querida.”

The girl obediently walks over and, as Amity extinguishes the magical flame and crosses her legs to create space for the child, she drops heavily into her lap. Amity grunts softly at the sudden weight, _I may be getting too old for her more exuberant hugs,_ she thinks. She dismisses the thought immediately, _even if it hurts, nothing could make me give up her cuddles._

Camille leans back against Amity and stares into the mirror. She points curiously at the painting behind them. “Is that you?” She asks in wonder.

“Yes.”

“Wow, you were really pretty. Is that when you were Mami’s age?”

“Thereabouts,” says Amity and she smiles sadly. “And look, there’s your grandmother. Can you ever believe she was so cute?”

Camille coos for a moment over her grandmother’s certified adorability, then she stills. Her eyes are wide with unbridled curiosity but there is caution there too. She hesitates for a moment before asking, “And is that Luz?”

“Yes, Camille. That’s your great-grandma.”

“You never talk about her.”

Amity sighs and runs her fingers through Camille’s short hair, ruffling it slightly. “Sometimes, when you love someone very much … it hurts too much to talk about them. Sometimes it even hurts to think about them.”

“Is that why the painting is up here?”

“Yes.”

“Did it work, Gramity?”

“Did what work, corazoncita?”

Camille’s eyes - _Luz’s eyes_ \- meet Amity’s in the mirror. “Not thinking about her. Did you stop missing her?”

 _Out of the mouths of babes._ Amity averts her gaze, wanting to avoid those eyes for a moment longer. Her efforts are in vain as, instead, her eyes meet Luz’s in the painting. 

“No, it didn’t. I don’t know that I will ever stop missing her.”

“I wish I had met her,” says the young girl. “Sometimes Mami talks about her, but I think it makes her sad too.”

“Would you like me to tell you about her?”

“Yes please, Gramity!”

With a soft groan, Amity lifts Camille into her arms and calls a sheet-covered wingback chair from across the room. She sits down and settles the child comfortably on her lap before drawing several small spell circles. Dozens of soft glowing orbs of light come into being and float above their heads.

Camille claps her hands together in delight and Amity casts a final light spell which she hands to the little girl. She cradles it gently in her tiny hands and looks up at her great-grandmother. The light pales next to the strength of the beam currently crossing her face.

“This was the first spell Luz ever learned, you know. Of course, your Grandma Luz cast it in a very different way.” Amity tickles her great-granddaughter, drawing a chuckle from her before she continues. “But I’m getting ahead of myself. Let me tell you the story of how Luz and I first met.”

Camille tucks her head in against Amity’s chest and snuggles against her. “Was it love at first sight? Like with Mami and Papi?”

Amity chuckles. “No. No, it most certainly was not.” 

_It sure was_ something _at first sight_ , she thinks to herself, smiling.

***

Sitting on the stairs just out of sight, Emira smiles. She rests her head on her knees as she listens to the story. She’s heard the tale so many times and from so many speakers that she finds herself mouthing parts along with her grandmother. Like so many times before, she chuckles softly at the idea of Amity screaming at a clay-covered Luz.

Her smile slowly fades. Grandmother never was the same after… Well, they’re long past due a visit to the tree.

She leans back against the wall and returns her attention to Amity’s low, soothing voice.

“Gramity?”

“Yes, Camille?”

“How come I never got to meet Grandma Luz?”

Unseen, Emira stiffens. She half-stands, ready to intervene if the question is too much for her grandmother.

But Amity sighs and tightens her grip on the child in her arms. “Your Grandma Luz had a song she used to sing sometimes.” 

Amity closes her eyes for a moment, trying to remember the words.

_“Sometimes people leave you_

_Halfway through the wood._

_Do not let it grieve you,_

_No one leaves for good._

_But you are not alone._

_No one is alone.”_

Amity holds the last note for a moment before allowing silence to rush back into the room.

“What did Grandma Luz mean by that, Gramity?”

“I’m not really sure, corazon. Or, I wasn’t. Maybe she meant that as long as we have our memories and our family, we’ll have each other.”

Amity gazes up at the painting of her dearest love, “Maybe avoiding her memory all these years and thinking it would save me pain... maybe it didn’t work as well as I thought it did.”

She smiles down at the child in her arms, “You’re very like her, you know.”

“I am?!”

“Yes. Very. Now, run along little witchling. Maybe later today we can visit Grandma Luz’s tree and I can tell you about how we defeated Grom through the power of dance.”

“THROUGH THE POWER OF DANCE?!”

Amity laughs and gives Camille a gentle push. “Go and find your Mami. I promise we’ll go very soon.”

Amity leans back in her chair and watches Camille leave with fond eyes. She stands and turns back to face the painting. Her eyes meet Luz’s directly for the first time. The likeness is good, but no mere image could ever hope to capture Luz’s exuberant essence.

She sighs. “I always knew one human lifetime would never be enough, mi amor.”

“But I wouldn’t trade a second of it for anything.”

With a soft smile, what feels like the first genuine one in years, Amity turns to head downstairs and find her family. It’s long past time they visit Luz’s grave beneath the Grom Tree.


	2. Full Circle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amity attends the social event of the season.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks as usual to Maxrimus for letting me ramble on at him about my writing and for being an excellent sounding board. You should read his [fics](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maxrimus/pseuds/Maxrimus), they're very good! 
> 
> I've linked images of outfit references in the end notes.

**90**

The soft glow of the setting sun bathes the Boiling Isles cliff side in amber. On the cliff’s edge, three people stand outlined against ocean vista. A gentle breeze nips playfully at their hair and clothes. A tall, almost austere-looking woman stands with her back to the cliff. She is dressed simply, but richly. Power bursts forth from her bearing and expression without the need to trumpet it with lavish dressings; her only ornament is a simple silver band resting delicately across her forehead. She clasps her hands before her and she gazes fondly at the couple standing before her.

A young woman stands resplendent in a white rockabilly-style dress with magenta trim. A matching sash encircles her waist and petticoats of the same deep colour peek from beneath her pleated skirt. A waterfall braid pulls her hair back from her face and it tumbles down her back in waves of bronze. Bright, loving eyes gaze passionately at the human standing beside her as if no one else in the world matters or even exists. Slender porcelain fingers reach across the divide to intertwine with strong, dark hands. 

Warm, brown eyes gaze back just as fervently. Black chino trousers hug long, muscular legs and deep magenta suspenders flow over wide shoulders. The top few buttons of a fitted white shirt are left carelessly undone and the human’s sleeves are rolled up to rest just above the elbow.

The charming timbre of a string quartet plays softly as pink petal blossom dances on gusts of air, swirling majestically around the trio. The Empress clears her throat and her voice rings out across the clearing with a confident authority.

Amity’s eyes trace the soft curve of a round ear and instantly, she feels the world fall away. Lilith’s strong, clear voice becomes muffled as though underwater. The ground no longer feels firm beneath her feet. She sways violently but realises with a familiar lurch that her body has not moved. She hangs, frozen, a low buzz filling her ears as darkness toys with the edges of her vision. And her eyes never leave those ears.

An arm wraps around her waist and she feels herself pulled close to another body. She concentrates on her breath, feels it enter her lungs and fill her ribcage. She focuses on the slight warmth it brings to her lips as she exhales evenly. Reluctantly, she tugs her eyes from the human before her and turns her head.

Willow smiles at her. After decades of friendship, no words are needed. Amity leans into the embrace and rests her head on the woman’s shoulder. Her hand reaches out to grasp Willow’s and clings to her with a soft desperation.

_Just let me get through this moment._

Her eyes snap forward as Lilith continues, “You may now kiss each other.”

The couple lunge forward. Strong hands clasp a delicate waist, drawing the two closer together as pale fingers dance through soft brown hair. Their lips meet with a sigh, with a gasp. They laugh as they kiss, as they cling to each other, as the world falls away.

Amity averts her eyes. Buries her face in Willow’s comforting shoulder. She hears Lilith pronounce the happy couple, but in this moment she cannot look up, cannot move past the growing ache in her chest, the bittersweet tang of fear and happiness and longing.

As the gathered crowd of loved ones cheers and applauds, no one notices one woman quietly slipping away. No one but Willow, who watches her with worried eyes. She peels away from the pack and walks towards the tree towering over them. Her path is an odd one; it circles away from the cliff, keeping a wary distance between her and the tree until she can approach it from the leeward side.

The warm glow of the fading sun casts shadows through the tree's mighty branches. Her fingers reach out in the dappled light to touch its familiar form. She kneels, searching for something she knows she will find and there it is, right where she expects it to be. A small carving, no bigger than her hand is set low into the tree trunk. Two sets of initials within a tiny heart. Soft, trembling fingers reach out to trace the scar her love has left.

A gentle hand touches her shoulder and she looks up to meet eyes just as full of memories as her own. A wavering smile tugs at her lips and is returned as Amity takes the proffered hand, rising to her feet.

“It was a beautiful ceremony.”

“It was.” Amity agrees. “I’m so happy for her… for them both.”

“But?”

“But I worry. I wouldn’t trade what we had for anything, but it is a hard path she has chosen.”

Willow nods, saying nothing. Her silent agreement and understanding fills Amity with warmth. But then guilt and regret simmer in her stomach and a deep sorrow rises up within her. She shouldn’t have avoided Willow all these years.

Unspoken words claw at her throat, clamoring to be spoken, but they die on her tongue. Excuses and promises and regrets are left unsaid.

Willow sees her hesitate, but she does not pry. Instead, she asks gently, “Are you ready to go back?”

Amity nods and Willow takes her friend’s elbow to guide back to the reception. They take their seats and smile politely at their table mates.

Suddenly, a small blur of bronze and gold hurls itself into Amity’s lap and she lets out a startled whuff of air. She looks down into a mass of wavy brown curls framing a bronze face. A smile so wide it must surely hurt, beams back at her.

“Grammy!” She cries. “Save me!”

 _Save you from what?_ The unasked question is answered as twin six-year-olds, fair of face and green of hair, rocket into her field of vision and come, screeching to a halt. They smile at her, somewhat shyly, but mischief dances in their eyes.

Camile turns to her cousins and pokes her tongue out at them. They playfully return the gesture and the three children laugh good-naturedly. Amity settles Camile more firmly on her lap and opens her arms to the twins who tentatively step into her embrace. She feels a pang at their hesitation but knows she only has herself to blame for it. Amity vows then and there to fix this distance, no matter what.

“And just what trouble have you three been getting up to?” Willow asks from beside her.

The twins straighten, seeing her for the first time. “Auntie Willow!” They cry and throw themselves at her with unabashed affection. With deceptively strong arms, she wrangles them both on to her lap and tussles their green hair.

Emery looks up at her with a wolfish grin, “We haven’t been doing anything, Auntie.” He says.

“We were just playing tag,” his twin, Edalyn agrees. “Camile taught us!”

“We’ve never played it before!”

Camile chimes in, “My new Papi taught it to me. It’s such a fun game! But no one can tag you if you’re getting cuddled, that’s the rules!” She gives the twins a pointed look.

“But look at the three of you!” Says Willow, “Don’t you all look dashing.” The children beam as they proudly smooth their fine clothes. They wear navy trousers with burgundy suspenders over white shirts. Matching bow ties are affixed neatly about the twins’ collars, while Camile appears to have tugged hers loose, its ends dangling loosely around her neck.

A familiar voice breaks through the low hum of conversation, “I am honoured to announce, for the first time ever, Mr and Mrs Luis and Emira Noceda-Ramires. Let’s give them a hand as they take to the floor for their first dance as a married couple!” 

The handsome pair move to the centre of the pavilion while Ed and Em Senior create a large spell circle which casts dozens of dancing, twinkling lights overhead. The couple face each other, step into each other’s arms and begin moving gracefully in time to the music.

“I wanna be just like Uncle Gus when I’m big.” Em announces to the room in general.

“No!” His twin argues loudly, “I wanna be like the Big Twins! They’re so good at illusion magic!”

“Who do you wanna be like when you grow up, Cami?” Willow asks, kindly.

Camile thinks for a moment before settling back in Amity’s arms. “I’m going to be just like Gramity.” She says and Amity tightens her hold around the little girl.

“Your new Papi is so handsome, Cam.” Em sighs. Ed laughs, shaking her head, “Yeah, he’s way better looking than _our_ dad!”

A surprised chuckle bursts forth from Amity’s lips, “You’d better not let him hear you say so!”

“It’s okay,” Ed says, shrugging her little shoulders. “Momma already told him. She says he’s pouting now.”

Willow and Amity share amused looks. Sure enough, over in the corner a familiar couple are sitting tensely, staring deliberately in opposite directions.

Camile bounces excitedly on her knee, “Do you wanna hear how they met?” Her cousins nod back enthusiastically at her.

“Mami was doing something for Uncle Gus in the Human Realm - something to do with noose papers, I think - and she stopped in a stupor-market to buy some coffee for Gramity.” She leans against Amity’s chest and tilts her head to look up at her. “‘Cause you love coffee; don’t you, Grammy?”

“I do love coffee.” Amity admits with a smile.

“So Mami was trying to get some off the top shelf, which was hard because she’s so short. Not as short as me, but that’s what Papi says anyway. And suddenly a man ran right into her, knocking her off her feet. Mami says she remembers turning to shout at him but that she just couldn’t. Papi says she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen!”

“That’s so romantic,” sighs little Emery.

“Papi helped Mami up and Mami says it was like being struck by lightning. She says she fell in love right there. Papi says he knew right away, he says it was love at first sight.”

Edalyn scoffs. “There’s no such thing as love at first sight!”

“Is too!”

“Is not!”

Emery cuts through the bickering cousins, “Great-grandma would know! Gr- Gramity,” Amity smiles sadly, but encouragingly as he stumbles over the nickname, “-is there such a thing as love at first sight?”

Amity’s smile trembles. Camile looks up at her in surprise as she feels her great-grandmother’s body tense. Amity’s eyes become fixed on the newlyweds gently swaying to the soft music all around them. She feels frozen, unable to answer such a simple question.

Willow answers, her compassionate gaze resting on Amity. “I think it exists. But I think it is pretty rare. Most love grows slowly over time.” She turns her warm eyes on the children. “But all love, no matter how it begins or where it comes from, requires work. Like plants, love can wither away if it is not tended to and cared for.”

She reaches out to ruffle each child’s hair in turn, “Even familial love can fall away sometimes. Which is why you three need to make sure you appreciate each other through the years. You need to stick together and look after each other.”

Amity feels no reproach or judgement in Willow’s words, only empathy and understanding. She manages to smile blandly at the children and feels Camile relax in her arms once more. She tries to focus on the music, to hear its gentle swell and drift away with it on the breeze.

But she turns her gaze back to the dance floor and her eyes linger once again on Luis’ round, human ears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Outfits:  
> [The dress](https://i.etsystatic.com/18396515/r/il/ed62b9/1601982104/il_570xN.1601982104_9hlw.jpg).  
> [The chinos](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CpCLJAcVYAAQrb8.jpg) (minus the driving gloves and imagine that the suspenders match the magenta of the dress).  
> [Notable mentions](https://i.pinimg.com/736x/83/21/e8/8321e874481ab32e2e5866d5591f6f58.jpg).
> 
> As always, thanks for reading everyone. I'd love it if you left me a comment and told me what you think.  
> I'll see you all in the next chapter!


	3. New Beginnings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was written to [Tchaikovsky’s Valse Sentimentale](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rUuusqy50yk%C2%A0) on repeat. I recommend listening to it while you read.
> 
> Obligatory outfit info:  
> This [robe](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EV0sSQuWAAMMUp6?format=jpg&name=large) is worn over a simple black nightgown.
> 
> **TW: mention of implied domestic violence**

**86**

On the hill above Bonesborough there sits a tall house. Greenery flows up its walls and around the windows. A glass dome sprouts from its gabled roof to tower overhead. From her bedroom window, a woman peers out into the steadily fading light.

The soft hush of the approaching darkness is broken as moody clouds roll swiftly across the heavens, and the skies open with a hiss. An ethereal mist rises from the steam of the falling rain to envelope the house in shadows.

A boom of thunder is followed by a flash of lightning and a wry smile flickers across the woman’s lips just as quickly. She crosses the room to an elegant wardrobe. Opening it, she confidently selects a robe and pulls it on over her black silk nightgown. The robe is sheer, almost diaphanous and it clings to her form as it drapes to the floor.

It is rare for her to indulge her sorrow in this fashion. Only in the amber half-light of dusk, only as an encroaching storm bans visitors from her door, only when longing rises from within like a monster to be slain.

Raising a hand imperiously over her head, she draws a small circle and every candle in the house bursts into flame. A magenta glow is cast across her face and she closes her eyes in soft anticipation. Fingers twirl once more and the insistent tattoo of rain is joined by the soft opening strands of orchestral music.

As the music picks up tempo, the woman twirls. She sweeps majestically from the room and down the stairs, her robe billowing behind her. She glides down the hallway on light feet and comes to a door.

Throwing open the double doors with a flourish, she reveals a wide open expanse of floor. Grand drapes buffer stately windows which stretch up to the domed glass ceiling high overhead. A clap of thunder and flash of lightning loan their presence to the music’s tempo and a maudlin smile tugs at her features.

This room was their sole indulgence while building the house and it remains one of her favourite places in the world. The library’s walls are lined with tall bookcases and narrow walkways separate the two floors, leaving the room open below. The space is rarely used now and small flurries of dust are kicked up as she pirouettes across the entrance. Her serious expression is briefly blessed by a sardonic smirk as she loops an arm through the rung of a rolling ladder attached to the bookshelves, swinging around the outside of the room before twirling away. Throwing her head back, she leans over the grand piano in the corner and kicks one leg dramatically into the air.

Memories overwhelm her. Of dances, of laughter, of kisses. 

Of love. 

She feels the wetness on her cheeks but does not halt her feverish dance. Her intensity increases as she casts a final spell. A tall and slender humanoid creature rises from the floor. Lightning crashes once more across the sky, throwing the featureless purple face into relief. The woman’s severe expression returns as she steps into the creature’s arms. Together, they glide seamlessly into a fast waltz.

A sudden booming cuts across thunder, music and lightning and snaps her from reverie. She frowns as the abomination collapses in on itself. With a wave of her hand, the music stops as abruptly as it began. 

The booming continues.

And, like the last caress of the evening light, her nostalgic melancholy evaporates into the ether.

Embarrassment and anger flood through her, chasing away the last hints of her bittersweet saudade. Amity awkwardly pulls her robe close to her body and ties it tightly around her waist. Scooping up a candlestick, she makes her way to the front entrance. An irritated curiosity surges through her as she pulls open the door.

Lightning flashes overhead, illuminating a young woman. She leans, panting against a column. A pale and flickering forcefield remains overhead, barely protecting her from the boiling rain still managing to make its way beneath the small porch covering. Steam rises from her cloak and she tugs at her hood to reveal a familiar face made ashen with exhaustion. Her arms are clutched protectively around a bundle, pulled tight to her chest.

”Emira?” She asks, astonished.

Another flash of light barely reveals a grim smile, hidden in shadow.

“Grandmother.”

Quickly casting her own forcefield, Amity rushes forward to support the young woman. Self-imposed hermitage or no, her granddaughter needs her right now. Emira lets her own forcefield collapse with a soft pained moan. Casting a spell to pick up the scattered bags at Emira’s feet, Amity ushers the young woman inside.

As Emira moves past her, Amity catches sight of a deep, swollen purple marring her pretty face. She reaches out to catch her chin but Emira pulls away.

“Grandmother, meet your great-granddaughter.” Her arms unfurl from her chest and a tiny infant stares back at Amity with unfocused eyes. “This is Camile.”

Amity freezes. _That name._ A dull buzzing fills her ears for a moment before reality floods back in.

She feels so overwhelmed by everything, by the unexpected intrusion, by the deep bruise on Emira’s face, and now, by _that name_. But seeing that small, perfect face peering back at her, Amity feels a shattering in her chest as her heart cracks and a shaft of light burns through its frozen core.

“Come inside, Emira.”

***

Settled on the couch with a roaring fire in the grate before her, Emira begins to look less pale. Amity hands her a mug of mulled apple blood silently.

The soft crackle and pop of the burning wood fills the air with rising tension and a soft rush of words fall from Emira’s lips. “I’m sorry for bothering you, it was just the closest shelter and, well, we needed to get out of the rain. I’ll be gone first thing in the morning, Grandmother. You won’t have to worry about a thing.”

Sorrow passes through Amity like a ghost. She realises with a jolt that the last time she saw Emira was her graduation - Titan, how many years ago? And even that was from a distance. The time before that had been the fu...

“Where would you go?” She asks, halting that particular train of thought.

“We’ll find our own place or, if we have to, we’ll stay with Mother.”

Amity blinked in slow surprise, “You patched things up with your mother?” As far as she knew, things had been tense between the two since Emira was 14. Guilt claws at her ankles as she realises she never bothered to find out why.

“No.”

Amity hesitates. She looks at the soft brown face, swaddled in warm blankets.

“Then you’ll stay here. Both of you. For as long as you need.”

Emira exhales in relief.

“Thank you, Grandmother.” She takes a long sip of her drink.

“We need not speak of it tonight,” Amity says, eyeing the bruise suspiciously, “But we will need to speak of it eventually, Emira.”

Emira winces and nods, “I know.” She whispers.

Her grandmother hesitates before asking, “Will anyone come looking for you?”

Emira’s eyes harden, “No. I made sure of that.”

Amity frowns, realising that she doesn’t know this young woman before her well enough to know whether that steel within her eyes is from resolve… or if it is something more deadly.

The younger woman looks up, realising the possible conclusion her grandmother could be pondering. “He’s alive. He just won’t come looking for us.”

Amity nods at her. She feels at a loss as to how to comfort this stranger before her. Or even if she should comfort her. Emira looks as though she is spun from woven glass, like a gust of wind could shatter her. But underneath that tension and fragility, Amity can see an unyielding strength at the woman’s core.

“You did well.” She says softly.

Emira flashes her a tired smile. She studies the woman seated before her, this fixture of her childhood turned nebulous enigma of myth and story. Her golden eyes close for a moment in thought, then she nods decisively.

“Grandmother?”

“Mmm?” Amity hums a response, staring now into the heart of the fire.

“I don’t know how to tell you this, but it seems your husband has vanished under strange and mysterious circumstances.”

Amity whips her head around, quirks an eyebrow.

Emira lifts her own brow in answer and nods at her grandmother’s attire.

Amity flushes a deep magenta and draws herself imperiously to her feet.

“We will _never_ speak of this again.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter happened because no one and nothing will convince me that Amity isn’t a dramatic lil shit. And I don’t think adulthood or even grief could ever change that. 
> 
> I used this [drawing](https://kelpls.tumblr.com/post/73698778883/practicing-drawing-some-waltzes-with-a-couple-of) as a reference for my sketch of Amity and the Abomination.
> 
> Thanks also to SettlerofSubs on The Owl House discord and to [Maxrimus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maxrimus/pseuds/Maxrimus/works?fandom_id=36532417) for tracking down images of Luz-shaped abominations for me to stare at while I wrote this.  
> <https://twitter.com/bixelswixels/status/1301598088524562434?s=21>  
> [ https://www.reddit.com/r/TheOwlHouse/comments/j52p7k/distracted_summoning/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf](https://www.reddit.com/r/TheOwlHouse/comments/j52p7k/distracted_summoning/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)  
> [https://lumity-rights.tumblr.com/image/634713801759096833 ](https://lumity-rights.tumblr.com/image/634713801759096833%C2%A0)


	4. I Can't Say Goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm really proud of this one.
> 
> Also, I'm sorry?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was written to [Schindler’s List - Theme (Extended)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dkJcSXE7wdc%C2%A0). I recommend listening while you read.
> 
> The song featured is [Remember Me](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-CUunRQOl8A) from Disney’s Coco as covered by AnnaPantsU.

**73**

The day is perfect. Golden rays caress the crowd from a cloudless sky. A gentle breeze sweeps through the congregation, bringing a soft relief to the warm glow of the sun.

The day is perfect.

And she hates it.  _ On today of all days, the skies should open. Darkness should wrest control from sunlight. Rain should scald and soak the earth. Thunder and lightning should rage at the injustices of life.  _

_ At the injustices of death. _

The woman stands apart from the crowd. She dressed carefully this morning in neat, dark clothing, but those closest to her can see her imperfections, can see she has buttoned her coat incorrectly, can see a small stain on her blouse, can see tendrils of hair escaping their bonds.

A small group stands watch nearby. Worry and grief play in one woman’s eyes as she watches her friend. She pulls her glasses off suddenly, cleaning them on her shirt and wiping her eyes surreptitiously as she returns them to her face. Beside her, flanked by their stony-faced partners, stand twins with alabaster skin and dark green hair. Their usually mischievous and youthful faces appear aged and deep set with sorrow. They link hands with each other and with their partners while their eyes remain fixed on their sister. 

A woman flanked by teenaged girls watches her mother as she stares dully into the distance. She cannot begin to imagine her mother’s pain. It is so big it threatens to overwhelm even her own. She reaches out to touch her daughters, to remind herself of their presence, their realness. The youngest flinches away from her touch and tears spring to the woman’s eyes. Her eldest notices and reaches out to her mother and sister, taking their hands and holding them gently. The woman squeezes her daughter’s hand. She feels full to the brim with grief and worry, worry for her mother, for her daughters, for herself.

The small group of family and loved ones stand vigil between Amity and the wider horde. They hide her from the public’s sight as best they can, eager to ignore their own sorrow if they can protect her in this moment.

But Amity does not see them.

A hole in the ground yawns open before her; a gateway through which she cannot pass. Her hands clutch tightly at a silver canister, her fingers unconsciously tracing the engravings which criss-cross its surface.

_ How could something so small possibly contain someone so big, a life so rich and full? _

Amity tears her gaze away from the grave. Her eyes meet those of another woman standing apart from the crowd.

She stands in shadow. Wild, grey hair dances around her. Lifeless, heterochromatic eyes stare blankly back. Then there is a sudden flash of recognition, of light. And then a fierce look of hatred pierces Amity’s soul.

She averts her eyes as an old guilt rises up to seize her throat. Her breath catches and her gaze skitters away to land on the woman standing before her.

The woman’s lips are moving as she addresses the crowd, but Amity hears nothing. There is no sound, no crowd, no sunlight for her.

There is nothing but the container in her hands and the hole in the ground.

Even the tree overhead is lost to her.

Amity wishes she could cry. Wishes she could scream in incoherent fury and rage. Instead, she feels nothing. She almost welcomed the old guilt as relief from the vacuum. But it was only fleeting, gone as quickly as it came. And in its place, the Nothing rushed back in.

Amity flinches as a gentle hand takes her elbow and guides her forward to kneel before her wife’s final resting place. She knows what she is meant to do in this moment, but she cannot bring herself to move.

For a moment, everything is still. A hush falls across the clearing. And Amity is still frozen in place.

She feels an exchange of glances and the sudden presence of two witches kneeling either side of her. Their hands reach out to cover her own and gently, ever so gently, Luz’s ashes are laid to rest by Willow, Gus, and Amity.

She hears a choked sob to her left and feels Willow reach behind her to clasp Gus’ shoulder in comfort. She is dimly aware of King’s soft keening as he is cradled in Gus’s arms, but Amity remains unmoved. 

Slowly, her hands reach down to clasp the grass beneath her. They dig down, scratching into the earth as she tries desperately to feel something, anything.

But there is Nothing.

Brief glimpses of anger, of guilt. But they flit away as soon as she names them.

There is no sadness. She has looked everywhere inside herself, but she cannot find it. She knows it should be there, knows she should be grieving.

But there is only Nothing.

Listlessly, Amity becomes aware of the gentle strum of a guitar. She lifts her head and sees her grandchildren standing beside her. The youngest holds a guitar - Luz’s guitar, she realises lethargically - and her sister hums a moment before [singing](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-CUunRQOl8A).

_ Remember me _ _   
_ _ Though I have to say goodbye _ _   
_ _ Remember me _

Amity hears the familiar refrain and tries to will water to her eyes. She thinks of Luz and the life they shared and longs for the sweet release of tears.

Instead, there is Nothing.

_ Don’t let it make you cry _ _   
_ _ For even though I’m far away _ _   
_ _ I’ll hold you in my heart _ _   
_ _ I’ll sing this secret song to you each night we are apart _

_ Remember me _ _   
_ _ Though I have to travel far _ _   
_ _ Remember me _ _   
_ _ Each time you hear a sad guitar _ _   
_ _ Know that I’m with you the only way that I can be _ _   
_ _ Until you’re in my arms again _

_ Remember me. _

Maevyn's soft, low voice falters on the last line. Her sister, Emira, plays the last few notes on the borrowed guitar before swinging it on its strap to rest on her back. She reaches out to her older sister and draws her into a gentle embrace.

And still, Amity feels Nothing.

The gentle hand is at her elbow again, tugging her to her feet. Amity’s gaze returns to the hole before her and watches as the silver canister slowly disappears from view as dirt magically fills the grave.

A witch steps forward. His robes are black as night but a sash proclaims him to be a member of the construction coven. He bows respectfully before the grave before lifting both arms in the air and creating a large two-handed spell circle.

Slowly, as if growing from the Boiling Isles itself, a stone emerges. Those assembled watch in silence as a border of light glyphs, incomplete and interwoven, emerges from the marble. The crowd bears witness as letters dance across the surface in an elegant script.

_ Luz _ _   
_ _ ‘The Human’ _ _   
_ _ Noceda _

_ Beloved wife _ _   
_ _ Loving mother and grandmother _

_ She saved us all _

Amity stares at the stone and blinks furiously as anger overwhelms the Nothing. The anger races through her veins, flooding her as she stares at the simple epitaph. 

_ Luz was so much more than that.  _

There are no words to express who Luz was. No gravestone could ever be big enough to contain her.

***

Amity is not sure how she got to the wake. One moment, she was standing alone, staring at her wife’s grave; and the next, she is standing on a stage with a room full of strangers staring at her, expecting her to speak, to cry, to beg and wail.

Well, she wouldn’t. She couldn’t. All she has is Nothing. And Nothing isn’t enough for these people.

She stares over their heads in silence. After an aeon, Lilith steps onto the stage and gently ushers her away as Gus moves forward to speak instead.

The words of their friends flies past her ears unheeded and Amity realises with a jolt that she is no longer They or an Us, no longer a We. After almost 60 years, suddenly, she is an I again. Suddenly, she is alone.

She sits at her table in silence. People come and go. Strangers clasp at her hands in cloying sympathy but the dull roaring in her ears hides their words. Through it all, she picks a spot on the ceiling, studying it resolutely. Dimly, she is aware of her friends and family hovering nearby, stepping in to move people along if they linger too long or pry too closely.

Eventually even the most ghoulish of Bonesborough’s inhabitants can remain no longer. Wait staff appear silently and efficiently begin taking the room apart.

Amity stands woodenly and turns to leave. Her eyes on the floor before her, she startles slightly when a pair of high heeled shoes interrupted her path.

She looks up into Eda’s familiar face. And for a second, she feels relief. Relief because she can see the Nothing there too.

But then there is fury. Eda spits, her saliva falling to the ground like rain, to land between Amity’s feet.

Without a word, Eda spins on her heel and marches away.

Amity watches her leave. And feels Nothing.

***

She returns home. Where once its halls and rooms rang with the sounds of laughter, music, and delight; now, there is only silence.

Her family had attempted to join her, to comfort her. But Amity pushed them all away. She didn’t want them, she wanted Nothing. No, she wanted Luz. But failing that, Nothing would have to do. Nothing was all that was left. Nothing was everything she had.

She is drawn from her somber reverie by a knock at the door.

A brief flash of irritation thrums through her, interrupting the Nothing. She opens the door… and sees no one.

“Amity,” a soft voice wavers. “She’s gone.”

She looks down at King. Tears well in his eyes and he clutches a stuffed rabbit tightly in his tiny paws.

Amity says Nothing.

King’s ageless eyes gaze up at her, “She’s gone.” He repeats,

“Eda is gone. I… After the ceremony, I went home and…  _ it’s just gone. _ There’s nothing there anymore.”

He sobs and hugs his rabbit, “Amity, I need you. I don’t know where Eda is… and... I know things have been rough between you two but I’m worried about her. She shouldn’t be alone, just her and Hooty. She shouldn’t be by herself without me or L-”

Amity closes the door.

A whimper rises in King’s throat as he stares at the empty space where his friend had been. Tears flow freely as he curls up on the doorstep, clutching Francois tightly to his chest.

He is still there hours later when Azure comes to check on her mother. She looks at King and at the closed door. Picking the tiny demon up and cradling him in her arms, she knocks on the door.

She knocks and knocks.

But the door does not open again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks as usual to [Maxrimus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maxrimus/pseuds/Maxrimus) for proofreading, being a sounding board and just generally being a rad friend.
> 
> Please leave comments, I cherish each and every one I receive!


	5. Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This [song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hR9LYrCR_4I) gave me some of the vibes for this chapter.   
> 

**71**

The light of the breaking dawn beats down on a strange house in a clearing in the woods. A huge stained glass window shaped like an eye catches the light, causing the woman to shield her vision as she approaches. She pauses before the door, hesitating. Though she is here multiple times a week, still she always has a moment of trepidation, a twinge of sadness.

The owl on the door comes to life, his neck elongating as he swirls around the woman. He greets her exuberantly, but is careful not to touch her. He has learned his lesson too many times over the years: do  _ not _ touch this witch.

“Amity! Is it that time already?!”

A voice from inside responds to Hooty’s grating voice, “Amity!” The door swings open, slamming Hooty’s neck against the side of the house and a tiny figure ignores his grunt of protest at this treatment in favour of hurling itself at Amity, hugging her shins. King looks up at her with huge eyes. “I’ve missed you!”

Amity laughs, “I saw you two days ago, King!”

“Yeah, but that was two days ago!”

Chuckling, Amity bends down and scoops King into her arms. He wriggles out of her grasp immediately and climbs onto her shoulder, one paw gently clasped in her hair so as to keep his balance.

As Amity enters the Owl House, she is startled by a violent bang from the kitchen. Making her way through the lounge, and tripping over the accumulated debris, she sticks her head into the room.

A woman sits regally at the kitchen table, sipping daintily from a mug incongruously emblazoned with the words, ‘Hexual Icon’. Another mug, this one bearing the phrase, ‘Thirty and Flirty’, spins on its side in a small puddle of quickly congealing liquid. Averting her gaze distastefully from the mess, Amity looks out the open kitchen door, still swinging on its hinges from the force of the slam. She can just make out the speedily retreating figure of a woman in the backyard.

“You just missed her.” Lilith says humourlessly.

“Yeah,” Amity replies, “that happens a lot.”

“Apple blood?” Her former mentor enquires.

“Maybe after, if you’re still here.”

“I’ll be here. Someone has to act as a buffer between you two.”

King tugs lightly at Amity’s bronze hair, reminding her of his presence, “Do you think she’ll ever forgive you?”

“You’ll have to ask Eda that.”

“But it isn’t your fault!” said King, indignant on her behalf. “You were only doing what Lu-”

“I should probably get going, King.” Amity interrupted smoothly. She gently untangles the tiny demon from her hair. “Where is it?”

Lilith pointed her mug to a small suitcase near the back door.

King clings to Amity as she attempts to set him on the floor, “I’m coming too this time!”

Lilith stands and takes ahold of King by the scruff of his neck. “Put me down this instant, witch! I am your superior and you will unhand me!” His voice rises in pitch with his fury, and soon he is squeaking with rage.

Lilith ignores his squawking and sets him on the table. “You and I can go tomorrow. I’ll make a new illusion potion for you this afternoon.”

King stamps one tiny foot and crosses his arms grumpily. “I don’t know why you can’t just cast a spell on me.” He grumbles, shooting Lilith a mean look. “Some all-powerful empress you turned out to be.”

Lilith sighs and places a long-suffering hand over her eyes, “I’ve told you this a million times, spells just aren't as effective in the Human Realm. There’s too much chance of an illusion spell failing. We have to use a potion.”

“Stupid humans. Stupid potions. Stupid Human Realm and their stupid no magic. It’s all stupid, stupid, stupid.”

“ _ You’re _ stupid.” Lilith snaps back, almost inaudibly. 

Amity stops paying attention as the two continue to bicker. She picks up the suitcase and opens it with a key on a chain around her neck - one of five keys in existence, all fitting to this one peculiar suitcase. It floats into the air and transforms into a strange door with a creepy eye on it, then it swings open and white light blinds her for a moment.

***

The Human Realm is colder than the Boiling Isles and Amity is grateful for the leather jacket she threw on over her blush pink sundress this morning. As she walks purposefully down the quiet street, autumnal leaves crunch and crinkle beneath her boots. A gust of wind tugs at her hair and clothes, as she halts in front of a small bakery. Some would call the store artisanal, Amity just calls it delicious.

Emerging some minutes later with a hot coffee and a bag containing two boxes of fresh pastries, Amity continues her journey. Further down the street, she steps quickly into a small store covered in floral arrangements and bouquets. The florist greets her pleasantly and hands her a pre-prepared bouquet of pinks, creams, and soft greens. Amity smiles and brings the flowers to her nose, inhaling the soft sweet scent of rose petals and eucalyptus leaves. She thanks the florist and pays for the flowers. As she leaves, the store owner assures her they’ll have her flowers ready again for next time.

With her new purchases, Amity makes her way further down the street. She has slowly come to enjoy this walk, it gives her the time she needs to relax and centre herself. Even now, after so many visits, she still feels a sense of unease when she comes here. But the softly swirling scents of fallen leaves, flowers, coffee, and baked goods go a long way towards bringing her peace.

She pauses, like she always does, outside her destination. The building is squat and long, ugly and austere looking. The small flower beds outside do little to soften its harsh edges, but Amity knows that sometimes appearances can be deceiving. 

Pushing open the glass door, Amity steps into a simple but welcoming reception area. Soft furnishings decorate the area, with pot plants dotted here and there. There are bookcases and board games and soft, comfortable armchairs and sofas. The room could easily seat a dozen people but currently its only occupant is the receptionist behind her low desk.

“Mrs. Noceda!” The young woman with dark hair and glasses looks up from behind a large textbook to greet her with a smile. “It’s nice to see you again.”

“Now, Leigh, I’ve told you before. Call me Amity.”

The early 20-something blushes slightly. “Yes, Mrs- Amity.”

Amity grins, reminded fondly of a younger self for a moment. “And how are your studies going?”

Leigh smiles back, “Kicking my butt as usual, but I’m surviving.”

“Glad to hear it,” Amity smiles and pulls out the larger of the two pastry boxes she purchased. “For you and the rest of the staff.”

Leigh takes the offering with a cheerful grin, “I’ll make sure everyone gets some, thanks Mrs No- Amity!” Then she ducks below her large desk and re-emerges with a simple glass vase. “And here  _ you _ are! You can go straight on through if you like, she’s in her room.”

Amity hesitates, “How is she today?”

“She’s been having a good morning; she was laughing and joking with the night staff before they finished up.” Leigh replied kindly.

Amity makes her way down the hallway and ducks into a bathroom quickly to pour water in the empty vase and transfer the flowers into it. She pauses for a moment in front of the sink. Her eyes make contact in the mirror and she winces at her tired expression. Sighing, she brushes her long hair out of her face and ties it back into an updo. She splashes some cold water on her face and takes a deep breath before leaving.

Luz’s room is simple but comfortable. A white single bed with hospital railings is saved from starkness by a beautiful quilt bedspread in glorious reds and browns. A small bookcase displays several books and photographs. Amity lingers momentarily before one photograph of four youngsters in formal wear, and wistful fingers reach out to trace the smiling faces frozen forever in the image. In the corner, by the window, two armchairs sit facing away from the door. Placing the remaining box of pastries on the end table and throwing her empty cup into a nearby bin, Amity leans over the arm of the chair.

“Hello, my darling.”

Luz looks up at her with a small start. Her soft brown eyes are older now, framed with wrinkles and clouded with age, but Amity thinks they are as beautiful now, if not more, than the day they met. Amity just breathes for a moment, drinking in the sight of her wife’s face. She knows each and every line, each and every perfectly imperfect detail. Each and every one tells a different story; stories of love and laughter, of pain and sadness, of adventures and misadventures. She knows each and every one, how each and every line came to be. Amity loves those crow’s feet and how they came to sit on the prettiest eyes she has ever seen.

Her smile fades slightly when she sees the confusion in those beautiful eyes.

“I’m sorry, but… do I know you?”

Amity’s eyes slam shut and she takes a deep shuddery breath.  _ It shouldn’t still hurt this much. I should be used to it by now. _ But the pain is always the same. It washes over her like the ocean, like some powerful, uncontrollable thing.

Taking another deep breath, she opens her eyes and gives Luz a slightly watery smile. “You do. My name’s Amity.”

“Amity…”

Amity feels hope rise in her chest as Luz rolls her name around her mouth as though pondering its significance.

“That’s a pretty name.”

And just like that, the balloon deflates as quickly as it came. She tries to hide her disappointment, to force it down and just enjoy what time they do have together. She sits in the other chair and places the flowers she brought on the table beside the pastries.

“These are for you.”

Luz delicately sniffs the flowers, “They’re beautiful.” Then she smiles and opens the pastry box, “Arepa!” She exclaims in surprise, lifting the cornmeal and coconut cake to her lips and smelling it. “This is just like what my abuela used to make.” 

Luz’s familiar voice is stilted now. Where once words fell from Luz’s lips like a rushing waterfall, now they drip slowly from a leaky faucet. Pauses punctuate her words as she seeks their meaning in her slowly decaying mind. Each pause, each stumble and slur, drives a shaft deeper into Amity’s heart.

“I know. The bakery makes it special, just for you.”

Luz’s warm brown eyes meet Amity’s amber ones and she reaches between them to take her hand. “Thank you. Seriously.”

She pauses.

“What did you say your name was again?”

“It’s Amity.”

But a wide smile is bursting across Luz’s face like the sun.

“Just kidding.”

Amity’s eyes go wide with shock. She leaps to her feet, energy thrumming through her body as hot tears spring to her eyes. “You… you… You  _ asshole! _ ”

Luz looks shocked, “Amity, I’m so-”

“How could you, Luz? Do you have any idea what it’s like when you don’t know who I am? How painful it is?  _ How could you?! _ ” Amity turns away from her wife, staring out the window and crossing her arms, hugging herself tight.

Moments pass and silence hangs heavy in the room. The only sounds to break the silence are Amity’s heaving breaths and… an awkward shuffling sound.

Amity turns and sees Luz frantically trying to pull herself up out of the armchair, one hand reaching out to her.

Quickly dashing her tears away, Amity steps forward and takes the outreached hand. Luz tugs weakly, pulling her towards her. And Amity allows herself to be pulled. She lands on her knees before her wife, tears streaming down her face. She allows herself to be held, but still she avoids her eyes. Luz tangles their fingers together, and strokes her thumb across Amity’s soft skin. Then, she gently but surely places her fingers on Amity’s chin and lifts her head.

Amity feels her breath catch in her throat. Thick tracks of tears run down Luz’s face and her gaze is somber and serious, her mouth set in an apologetic smile. “Amity. Mi amor. I am  _ so  _ sorry.”

She squeezes Amity’s hand and Amity leans almost imperceptibly into the hand caressing her cheek.

“You’re right. I don’t know what it feels like. It must be awful.” She looks down, ashamed. “I shouldn’t have done that.”

Luz looks away, lost in her thoughts for a moment. Amity sits patiently, gazing up at her while she waits for Luz to return. “I just … I get so frustrated sometimes! There are days where it’s like I’m trapped inside my own head, watching as things happen around me and then there are days that are missing. They’re just  _ gone _ . And all I can think to do about it all is… is make jokes and say stupid things. But I am  _ so  _ sorry. I never meant to hurt you, corazon. I-”

Amity interrupts her, moving forward to press her lips against Luz’s. She kisses her softly, sweetly, desperately. She can taste salt and doesn’t know whose tears it belongs to. It doesn’t matter. Their tears intertwine, like they have so many times before.  _ As long as we’re together, we can get through anything. As long as I have you, I’ll survive. _

She leans forward until their foreheads touch. After so many years together, there is no need for more words.

_ I’m sorry. _

_ I forgive you. _

_ Never again. _

Their lips meet once more, tenderness rising up between them. They are panting, sobbing; their breath mingling until Amity isn’t sure where she ends and Luz begins.

“I love you.” She whispers hoarsely and hears the murmured echo.

“I’m sorry too,” Amity sighs, “You’re right. I don’t know what it's like for you either.”

“I wish…”

“I know.”

They cling to each other as the minutes tick by. Eventually, Amity gently eases Luz back into her armchair and takes her own seat. Luz reaches out to grasp Amity’s hand once more.

Amity chuckles, “Your cake will go cold.”

Luz smiles warmly at her, “There are more important things.”

They sit in comfortable silence for several long minutes. Then Luz asks, “How is everyone?”

Amity tells her about Willow’s new granddaughter, and about Gus’ recent foray into the world of human journalism. She tells her about Lilith and the state of politics back home.

She tells her about their family.

“... and Maevyn’s just gotten her first boyfriend.” She laughs, “I haven’t seen so much blushing since we were that age!”

Luz grinned, “What? You mean, when you looked in the mirror?”

Amity chuckles. “You know you were just as blushy as me. Well, almost as blushy. I caught them making out the other day and, oh I wish you could have seen it, they were practically glowing with embarrassment. I could have fried an egg on Maevyn’s face.”

“Oh Titan, do you remember when Lilith caught  _ us _ that one time?” asks Luz, waggling her eyebrows.

“That  _ one  _ time?!” They both laugh, basking in the memories and stories of loved ones.

Then Amity sighs, “Emira’s upset with her mother again though. And neither she nor Azure will talk to me about it. I just wish they’d open up to me.” She sighs. “I wish you were home, love. You’d know what to say to them. You always know what to say.”

Luz chuckles, “I doubt it. More likely I would try to fix it and just make a mess of things.”

Amity smiles back affectionately, “Perhaps, but it usually all fixes itself in the end. Somehow, when you’re involved everything gets tied up neatly in an easy-to-digest package.” She laughs ruefully, “Sometimes, over the years, I felt like I was a recurring role on  _ The Owl House Show _ as you, Eda, and King ran amok, sewing seeds of chaos wherever you went. But then you would somehow make everything alright again after learning a few important lessons along the way.”

“How are Eda and King, by the way?”

Amity sighs again, “She-”

The door to Luz’s room bangs open and they both jump. A tall man in his late 30s, wearing blue nurse scrubs sticks his head in and smiles apologetically. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realise anyone would be in here.”

Amity’s eyes flit to Luz who sits frozen. Her eyes now seem dull and lifeless; her mouth hangs open slightly as she looks about the room in obvious confusion. Amity frowns as she feels Luz’s hand twitching faintly in her own.

The man continues, unabashed. “I’m Scott.” He fusses fastidiously with his sandy hair for a moment, before holding a hand out to her. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Miss… ?”

Amity glares at the offending digits, “You’re new.” She says coldly.

He ignores her iciness and continues in warm, friendly tones, “Wow, you must be here a lot to be able to spot new staff! It’s so nice meeting relatives who  _ really _ care.” His tone is clearly aiming for sincerity but he misses the mark by a longshot, instead landing squarely in patronisation.

Scott pauses and his blue eyes give her a poorly hidden once over. “Hey, since I’m new to town, why don’t you show me around? Help me get my bearings and I’ll take you out to dinner afterwards.” He preens, confident in his desirability.

“I’m busy.” All of Amity’s attention is on Luz, whose mouth still hangs slightly open as she tries to find her words. Amity clings to her hand like a lifeline, silently willing Luz to find her way back to her.

“Oh c’mon now, don’t be like that. You’re beautiful, I’m beautiful. We could be beautiful together. C’mon, we should really get to know each other. I’m a great guy, just ask anyone! I think you should give me a chance.”

“I’m not interested.” She snaps. “Take a hint.”

“One drink.” He badgers her, “One drink and then I’ll leave you alone. If, after one drink, you still don’t like me - which I seriously doubt will happen - then I’ll promise to never bother you again. I’ll even make sure I don’t see you when you’re visiting your mother here.”

“My  **_wife_ ** **.** ”

Scott reels back, visibly surprised. “Really?  _ Her? _ What, is she rich or something?”

For the first time since he rudely entered the room, Amity looks at him. 

He flinches under the unadulterated fury in her golden gaze, but squares his shoulders and bravely soldiers on, “Or do you, like, just dig old people in general?”

Her face glows red in sudden incandescent rage, her vision blurs, and before she knows it, Amity is on her feet and pointing one furious finger at him. Somehow, she manages to stop herself from forming the spell circle that would castrate him.

“ **Get. Out.** ” She snarls. “Get out before I do something  _ you _ will regret!”

Roughly, she pushes him out into the hallway and slams the door shut.

“But I haven’t changed her bedding yet!” Comes a plaintive voice from behind the door.

“Find someone else to do it!”

“Amity?” A quiet voice wavers. “When did you get to the Owl House?”

Amity turns and sways as though physically struck. Blinking hard to hold the tears at bay, she gazes mournfully at her wife.

“You’re upset.” It isn’t a question. “Did Boscha do something again? Because if she did, I swear I’ll…”

“No, it’s not Boscha.”

Luz tilts her head quizzically at her. Slowly, carefully, she says, “Well, whatever it is, if you want to talk about it, I’m here for you.” Then she smiles, “Hey, how about we have Azura book club? Would that make you feel better?”

“You always make me feel better, mi amor.” Amity says, causing a fiery blush to explode across Luz’s face.

She splutters for a moment, “Am-  _ Amity! _ Who… who taught you Spanish?! Do you even know what that means?”

Amity buries her sadness and smirks, “I do. I'll tell you all about it later, querida.” She winks at Luz, causing her to flush even redder.

Crossing to the bookcase, she pulls down a familiar and well-thumbed book. Taking a seat and turning to the first page, she glances up at Luz and smiles fondly. Luz gazes back at her, wonder dancing in her eyes. One hand has worked its way to her chest, where she can feel her heart thundering violently.

Amity clears her throat. “The Good Witch Azura. Chapter 1…”


	6. It's Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise that if you hang in there, there will be fluffy chapters. 
> 
> I cannot promise that this is one of them.
> 
> Edit: 25/12/20 - Updated with art work and to change Vox from masc pronouns to NB.

**69**

The gentle blue glow of evening draws in to blanket the house on the hill. The cool night air races through the forest and around the house, seeking entrance. It whistles exuberantly through a kitchen window before letting out a mournful whimper as a hand reaches out to pull it shut. The wind must continue its journey elsewhere.

Inside, the woman who barred the way sighs heavily. She rests her hands on the kitchen counter and rests her weight there. She catches sight of her reflection in the dark glass and studies the face she sees there. Tousled, silver hair in a messy pixie cut frames a face heavy with the lines of life and laughter. Brown eyes, wide, expressive and intelligent, stare back at her from the darkness. She holds that gaze, just for a moment, before pushing herself slowly, achingly, back up to her once impressive height - now stooped slightly with the passing of time - and turns to face her partner.

The woman sits facing her. Her beauty and stillness could have been carved by a master sculptor; she is an alabaster statue with golden eyes and flowing bronze hair. And Luz marvels, not for the first time, at her beauty and at her own good fortune that brought this woman into her life. But as she gazes into her wife’s eyes, she realises that no sculptor could ever hope to possess the talent required to capture her beauty or to capture the conflicted expression of dread, of love, of frustration, of sadness on her face. 

“I know you don’t want to talk about this, but we have to.”

“We don’t _have_ to do anything, Luz!”

“Amity-”

“No. I don’t want to talk about this anymore. I don’t want to fight with you.” Amity’s golden eyes are red-rimmed and bruised with unshed tears. “I can’t- I just can’t think about this now. Not yet.”

Luz steps forward and her bones creak and groan as she kneels before her. She takes Amity’s hand in hers. “I don’t want to either, mi amor. But this is a conversation that needs to be had.”

“No.”

“Amity, the episodes are happening more and more. We need to-”

“No!” Amity stands up as the dam lets loose and tears begin to fall. “No.” She says again, more softly. “I’m not ready, Luz. I need more time.”

Luz looks into the eyes of the woman who has been her wife, her lover, her partner, her everything for the better part of five decades and her resolve … weakens. Just like it always does. She can’t deny this woman anything. She never could. Using the kitchen table to draw herself to her feet, she gently wraps her arms around her and pulls her in close.

Amity clings to her wife for several long minutes as sobs wrack their joined frames. Luz holds her tight. Her gentle fingers preen through silken hair. Her voice, soft and low in Amity’s ear, whispers melodious murmurs of comfort. Eventually, the tide ebbs and Amity presses her nose into the opening of Luz’s button up shirt, nuzzling it against her collarbone.

Trying and failing to hide the delicious shiver running up her spine, Luz takes Amity’s chin in her hand and lifts her face closer to her own. Amity’s eyes, swollen from crying, flutter shut. Her lips part and her breath ghosts across Luz’s skin. Luz swallows, hard, and cannot help but lean in. She opens her mouth to speak, their lips just barely brushing together as she forms each word.

“Time may not be on our side, mi amada.”

Amity pulls away from her with a frustrated growl, but Luz captures one of her hands, holds it to her beating heart.

“We need to do this, Amity. But perhaps not tonight. Maybe we can have tonight.”

Amity refuses to look at her, “I don’t ever want to deal with this, Luz.”

Luz’s thumb strokes across Amity’s knuckle, “I know.”

“I don’t know how I’m supposed to get through this.”

“I know.”

Luz lifts Amity’s hand and presses a small kiss into the base of her palm, “But I know you will. You’re strong. You can do this. _We_ can do this.”

“But not tonight?”

Luz smiles sadly. “No, not tonight, love.”

***

A sharp banging wakes her.

Amity groggily opens her eyes before wincing and shutting them again, blinded by the harsh summer morning light. She throws an arm across her face to block it out, but the banging continues.

“Luz.” She grumbles unhappily, rolling away from the light to nestle into her wife’s side, “There’s someone at the door.”

Her eyes blink open in surprise. The bed is cold and empty, the edge yawning away from her. “Luz?” Her voice echoes through their bedroom and Amity’s nerves are instantly ablaze. Tossing her blankets aside, she clambers out of bed and throws on a dressing gown.

She isn’t sure why she is suddenly anxious. It’s not like Luz never wakes up before her. But then she realises… the banging… the banging isn’t coming from the front door. 

Blood races through her veins as she pulls open the door and a bird flutters frantically into the room. Amity’s golden eyes follow the owl’s agitated path about the room.

“Lechuza?” She gazes in horror at the little creature. “Where is she? Is she hurt?”

The soft white of the little wooden owl glows in the early morning sun as she flicks back and forth between the window and Amity. Amity nods decisively and twirls her staff into existence. Her ebony fox companion is curled up in a tight circle on the top of her staff and one of their two heads yawns sleepily and blinks blearily about the room. Their eyes widen as the fox senses the tangible alarm hanging in the air. Swiftly, the head turns and grips the ear of another head in sharp teeth, tugging hard to wake their twin up.

“Lechuza, lead the way. Let’s go, Vox.”

With a gentle slap to her staff and a spell circle to throw open their bedroom window, Amity took flight after Lechuza. It didn’t matter that she was only wearing her pajamas and a dressing gown. Nothing matters except finding Luz.

It doesn’t take Amity long to realise where they are headed. And soon, the Owl House looms before them in the distance. She can see the familiar figure of her wife standing in the lee of the house. Lechuza hesitates for a moment before diving to fly around her master in wide, sweeping circles. Amity follows the palisman’s lead, alighting nearby. She twists and Vox unlocks from her staff to leap gracefully to the ground. As they fall, they double in size and sprint towards their master’s wife. Looking up at the tall woman, they yip at her in stereo, nuzzling against her calf.

“Luz?” She calls, cautiously.

Her wife turns, but there is no recognition, no love, no _light_ in her eyes. This isn’t her wife. This is a scared little girl, lost and alone, looking for her mother.

“Who are you? How do you know my name?”

Amity takes a deep breath and tries to quell the thudding in her chest. Speaking calmly and evenly, she says, “My name is Amity. I’m a friend. Let me help you, Luz.”

Amity slowly reaches out a hand to her wife, but she shrinks back. Lechuza takes that moment to attempt to land on her shoulder but Luz flinches away from the owl as well. Lechuza lets out a soft sad coo and flies instead to perch on Amity’s shoulder. Vox lets out a low whine at this and one of their heads takes a tugs gently at Luz’s pajamas. She looks down at them and her eyes widen.

“Dios mio!” She scrambles away from the two-headed fox creature. “What are you? What is this place?”

Vox whimpers and one of their heads hangs in shame while the other licks their cheek in comfort. Amity’s hand is still outstretched, still reaching for her wife, hoping she is somewhere in there, praying she can bring her back. This isn’t even 14-year-old Luz, an odd kid who could take weirdness in her stride. This woman is a stranger to her.

Both women flinch violently as the Owl House door slams open and two teenagers run outside.

“Grandma, Gramity! What are you doing here?” The elder of the two asks in greeting, while her younger sister ignores words in favour of barrelling towards her grandparents and throwing herself at Luz.

Amity registers what is about to happen and opens her mouth, but it is already too late.

“Get off me!” Luz yells. She shakes her granddaughter off roughly. Despite her age, Luz is still a strong, fit, and healthy woman and Emira falls to the ground with a heavy thud. Tears begin to well in her eyes as the 13-year-old stares up in horror at the kindest, gentlest woman she has ever known.

Luz is shouting now. Incoherent words falling from her lips like stones. She reaches out to grab Emira, to shake her, but she is stopped when the 15-year-old Maevyn swiftly pushes in front of her sister.

“Grandma,” She says calmly, her voice quavering, “You need to stop this. Now.”

Amity heaves a sigh of relief and steps forward to place a calming hand on Luz’s shoulder. “I know that you’re scared right now, Luz. It’s all too overwhelming right now, isn’t it?”

Luz turns her face away, but not before Amity can see the stark tracks running down her face. She lowers herself to the ground and, hugging her knees to her chest, she rocks ever so slightly as she cries.

“Are you okay? Can you tell me what’s wrong?”

Her mouth falls open and shut but the words do not come.

“Are you hurt?”

“My legs…” She finally manages to mumble.

Amity casts a glance at the teenagers and gestures for Maevyn to take Emira inside. Her youngest granddaughter has dirt on her face from her fall and her face is ashen.

“Can I look?” Luz nods hesitantly and Amity carefully rolls up her pant leg to see a bruised and bleeding knee. With delicate movements she reaches out to trace a tiny spell circle over the cuts. Luz watches in awe as the scrape heals itself. “Magic.” She whispers and a tiny smile appears on her face. Amity repeats the process on Luz’s other leg and Luz watches with just as much interest.

“Would you like to see some more magic?” Luz nods her head vigorously.

Looking around, she spies Vox behind Maevyn, tail tucked and heads hung low. She clicks her tongue and they bound towards her, leaping into the air and shrinking once more to take their place on her staff. Gracefully she draws a large circle and suddenly a glowing vortex appears before them.

“It’s a portal. It will take us home,” Amity explains to Luz. “Would you like to try it?”

As Luz eagerly steps forward, Amity mutters sotto voce to the two witchlings, “I’ll be back as soon as she is settled.” Then she follows her wife into the light.

***

Once an exhausted Luz is curled up in bed with her faithful palisman watching over her, Amity returns to the Owl House. She enters without knocking through the kitchen and sees Maevyn puttering about at the stove. Emira sits at the table, a blanket wrapped around hunched shoulders that curl in on themselves as though to keep the whole world out.

Amity walks to Maevyn and places a gentle hand on her shoulder, giving her a reassuring squeeze. The young woman looks relieved to see an adult. She has been doing her best, but this all feels too much for her.

“Where is everyone?” Amity asks.

Maevyn grimaces slightly, “Eda and King had to go do something - in their words - ‘completely and totally legal’. Mother and father are at home; we came alone today.”

Amity nods and squeezes her granddaughter’s shoulder again.

“Come,” she says. “Sit.”

Amity guides Maevyn to the table and sits between the two girls. Reaching out she gently intertwines one hand through each of theirs, holding their fingers loosely.

“That must have been really scary for you both.” She begins.

“What’s wrong with Grandma? Why was she so angry?” Emira’s voice is tiny, that of a much younger child.

Amity sighs. “Your grandmother has a human illness. It’s something that can happen to some humans as they get older. It means that sometimes she forgets things or gets lost or confused.”

“But why was she angry?” Maevyn parrots her sister’s question.

“Sometimes people with dementia can become violent or aggressive. As the illness progresses it can become harder for them to express what their needs are and that can cause them to act aggressively. In this case, I think Luz was in a lot of pain from falling earlier and was confused about who and where she was. It seemed like she couldn’t remember much about the Boiling Isles. All of that combined to make her feel scared and overwhelmed and the only way she had of expressing that in the moment was through shouting.”

Amity sends a pulse to each of the hands in hers. “But Luz doesn’t want to be aggressive. She’s not acting this way on purpose and she still loves you very much.”

Emira’s eyes are filled with sadness, “How can she love us if she doesn’t remember us?”

Squeezing the 13-year-old’s hand again, Amity says, “I believe - with all my heart - that even when Luz is struggling to remember who she is and who we are, that there is a part of her in there somewhere that is still holding on to that love.”

She smiles sadly, “I’ve never met anyone who loved quite so fiercely or strongly as your grandmother. And I think it will take more than an illness to take that away from her.”

Maevyn looks up, a serious expression on her face and Amity is struck once again by the strangeness of seeing such a sober expression on a face so like her sister’s. “What’s going to happen to her, Grammy?”

Tears fill Amity’s eyes and she takes several deep breaths, trying to rein them in. Suddenly Maevyn squeezes _her_ hand.

“It’s okay to cry, Grammy. It’s sad. It makes sense that you’re crying.”

Amity smiles fondly at her, “Ah, Maevyn, always looking after everyone. Don’t you know that it’s _our_ job to look after you?” She asks rhetorically. Then she sighs heavily. “Luz and I have been talking about this for a little while now, that perhaps it’s time for her to return to the Human Realm where there are places and people trained in supporting humans as they age. I didn’t… I don’t want to do that. But perhaps it is time.”

The three of them sit in a somber silence for a few minutes, then Emira speaks up as a thought occurs to her.

“Gramity, we’re part human. Does that… Does that mean that it could happen to us too?”

“... I don’t know, dear. I just don’t know. I hope not.”

***

Amity clings to Luz’s hand as they stare up at the building in the Human Realm. It squats on the hill like some grim beast, long and grey and featureless. Flowers nestle against its structure in an attempt to liven the place up but the exterior is beyond saving. The building is death itself.

Luz squares her shoulders. “I know it doesn’t look like much, but…”

“I know. It’s so close to the portal. We should at least check it out.”

“Who knows? Maybe it’s not so bad once we get inside.”

Hand in hand, they enter the facility and are pleasantly surprised by what they see. Soft, worn furnishings dot about the reception area. Several residents and visitors occupy some of the seats, playing games, reading, and talking.

A man in his late 30’s with a bright smile, large round glasses, and a clipboard greets them as they walk through the door. He shakes their hands warmly, “You must be the Noceda’s. Welcome to Brightview.”

He introduces himself as the general manager of Brightview and gives them a brisk tour of the facilities. Luz’s head is spinning from the pace he sets and from all the new information whirling around her head but she grits her teeth, determined not to worry her wife or to ask the man to slow down. He seems to notice her frustration though and falls into an easier pace as he guides them to his office and waves them into the large comfortable seats.

The man talks for a long time. He talks about the services they provide, how they support residents, the training and qualifications of the staff. He talks about the cost. Amity blanches slightly at the figure and is exceedingly grateful for the Boiling Isles bloodstone. 

Several years ago, they had discovered that the bloodstone - the most common, cheap, and gaudy of the Boiling Isles gems - was indistinguishable from the Human Realm’s ruby. Thanks to some shady connections that Eda’s unerring nose for trouble had managed to sniff out, they had managed to procure a tidy sum of human money. But the rest home would take a large chunk of that money. Amity realised she would have to continue with this illicit gem ring into the future in order to secure Luz’s well-being.

Returning her attention to the present moment, Amity realises that Luz’s hand is now slack in her own. She squeezes it gently, “Luz?”

Luz turns to look at her, her bright intelligent eyes clouded with age and confusion, “Amity? You’re not in the Potions Track, you need to get to class quick or you’ll get in trouble!”

The man’s eyes are gentle with compassion. “It’s difficult when our loved ones begin having delusions or hallucinations. Do the delusions happen often?” He asks Amity.

Luz bristles at his words, “Delusions? Magic is real! I can prove it too!” She tries to leap to her feet, but her old bones aren’t 14 anymore and she trips. The only thing stopping Luz from crashing to the ground is Amity’s firm grip on her hand and arm.

Amity looks at the man as she carefully guides her wife back to her seat, “Can we have some time to think about it? We need to discuss whether it’s a good fit.”

He hummed slightly, “You can… but we only have one dementia care room available and I have other families coming in this week to view it.”

Amity hesitates, just for a moment. Then she looks at her wife, at her muddled brown eyes and she nods decisively. “We’ll take it.”

***

A week later, Amity and Luz are standing in the Human Realm, a large duffel bag at their feet. Amity smiles sadly and takes Luz’s hand in hers.

“Before we go, can we have just one last adventure?”

Luz smiles at her, tangling her fingers with Amity’s, “Of course, mi amor. Wherever you lead, I will follow.”

Amity guides her wife to the car they keep registered and parked nearby for them to use when they visit the Human Realm. She shakes her head briefly, smiling at the memory of the time she forgot to lock it. They were fortunate to get the car back in one piece and the teenagers who had taken it were fortunate to see magic up close and personal. They were also fortunate that Luz had been there to cool her temper.

Amity gives Luz’s hand a gentle tug when the other woman walks to the driver’s side of the car. She looks up and scratches the back of her head with her other hand, smiling ruefully. “Sorry, force of habit.”

Putting the car into drive, Amity begins to take them out of the suburbs, towards the countrywide with its wide open roads and sloping hills. The drive is silent, save for the sound of the engine and the rattle of the car. Amity glances away from the road briefly to look at her uncharacteristically silent wife. “You still there, querida?”

“Amity!” Luz beams at her. “When did you learn Spanish?”

Her grip on the steering wheel tightens and she says nothing.

She parks an open field and walks around the car to open Luz’s door. She holds out her hand and Luz is quick to take it, allowing Amity to lace their fingers together and help her out of the vehicle. She pauses to thank whatever deities exist in the Human Realms that Luz has always been a very tactile person. It makes her episodes easier to manage in some ways. She looks at Luz as she bounces on her heels, enthusiastically swinging their arms back and forth. In some ways, it makes it much, much harder.

She leads them into the field. Rows of golden wheat stand tall in the sun. Amity can feel the soft fronds brushing against their interlaced fingers as they walk. Luz’s hand drops from Amity’s grasp and she steps forward to spin slowly in place, her hands reaching out to caress the barley as she turns. She finishes facing Amity, a giddy smiles on her face and a flush in her weathered cheeks.

Amity smiles. She can still see the carefree teenager in her lover’s smile, the confident young woman, the loving mother, the doting grandmother. She holds out her hand, enticing, “May I have this dance?”

Luz beams at her and steps forward to take her hand. “Who needs music?” She says, cheekily.

“Not us.” Amity agrees.

They fall into it as easily as breathing. Graceful steps and turns flow from the pair as though rehearsed, as though fate always intended them to dance together.

Eventually their movements slow. Amity places her arms around Luz’s neck and Luz’s hands fall to rest just above her hips. She tucks her head in against Luz’s chest. She needs a moment’s respite from the confusion in her eyes, just a moment where she can cling to her wife and savour her, a moment she can hold on to. A moment to remember.

Luz clears her throat softly. Her lips part and Amity starts slightly as her wife begins to [ sing ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4dXabQhT5c&list=LLvJ51e0QH3_0F7WOlzDLIaQ&index=184) in her familiar husky voice.

 _You'll remember me when the west wind moves upon the fields of barley_ _  
__You'll forget the sun in his jealous sky as we walk in fields of gold_ _  
__So she took her love for to gaze awhile upon the fields of barley_ _  
__In his arms she fell as her hair came down among the fields of gold_

Amity’s head shoots up and her gaze locks with eyes warm and full of meaning. Luz smiles as she continues to sing. Tears glisten unshed in her eyes and Amity leans back into her, basking in the love that only Luz could give her.

 _Will you stay with me, will you be my love among the fields of barley?_ _  
__We'll forget the sun in his jealous sky as we lie in fields of gold_ _  
__See the west wind move like a lover so upon the fields of barley._ _  
__Feel her body rise when you kiss her mouth among the fields of gold_

Nuzzling into her chest, she presses a soft kiss to Luz’s neck. She smiles sweetly as she feels the song’s vibrations rumbling against her lips.

 _I never made promises lightly and there have been some that I've broken_ _  
__But I swear in the days still left we'll walk in fields of gold_ _  
__We'll walk in fields of gold_ _  
__Many years have passed since those summer days among the fields of barley_

They were both crying now. Luz’s breath hiccups and she stumbles over her words as she fights for air among her sobs. Amity clings to her with a desperation she has never felt before. Before now there had always been hope. They could always fight. They would always triumph. 

But no one can fight the endless march of time.

 _See the children run as the sun goes down among the fields of gold_ _  
__You'll remember me when the west wind moves upon the fields of barley_ _  
__You can tell the sun in his jealous sky when we walked in fields of gold_ _  
__When we walked in fields of gold, when we walked in fields of gold_

As the last notes peter out into the summer air, the two women embrace tightly. Neither one wanting to let the other go. Neither one wanting to admit that, perhaps, their journey together is coming to an end.

Neither one wanting to admit that it’s time to go.

***

Amity returns home alone. Their big house feels suddenly empty and cold and she has no real desire to be there, but she has nowhere else to go right now. So she wanders through rooms without any real purpose or aim. Luz has been gone barely for two hours and already Amity feels lost without her, directionless, untethered. 

Her family and friends had checked in, of course, but Amity had insisted she wanted to be alone. Luz had said her goodbyes to all of them earlier that week, but one witch had been stubbornly absent. 

Amity takes several deep, hiccupy breaths as tears threaten, once more, to overwhelm her. Then she leaps in fright as the front door slams open.

Wind howls triumphantly as it races down the hallway, whipping at Amity’s clothes. A figure stands, framed in the doorway, backlit by the last glowing embers of the day’s light.

The figure stalks towards her, fury in flashing in her eyes. Amity has rarely seen Eda this angry, and it had never been directed at her. The last time she remembers seeing Eda this angry, she had single-handedly defeated Amity’s parents in a vicious two-on-one duel that had ended in victory and freedom for the Blight siblings.

But this time Eda’s narrowed gaze spears Amity through her broken heart.

“WHO GAVE YOU THE RIGHT-” She snarls, but cuts herself off. “How _could_ you?”

Amity opens her mouth and searches desperately, but she could find no words there.

“Do you have any idea what those places are like?!” Eda screeches at her. “You’re just going to put her in a room and leave her to rot, is that it?”

Finally, Amity found her voice. “We didn’t have a choice!” She yells back. “Luz was getting worse and worse and… we just couldn’t handle it anymore.”

“You mean, _you_ couldn’t handle it.” Eda retorts coldly. “I guess ‘in sickness and health’ really were just words for you.”

Amity snarls, baring her fangs. “Do you think I _wanted_ this? Any of this? She’s the love of my life and she-” She chokes off her words as tears splash down her cheeks. She has cried so much today. Amity didn’t know she had that much water in her, but still the tears continue to fall.

“If you didn’t want this then you should have done something else!”

“ _Because it’s what she wanted!_ ” Amity clasps her hands over her mouth, horrified. “ _Wants_.” She stutters. And Eda almost looks smug, triumphant that she has won this sparring match. “This is what Luz wants. This is what we need. To keep her and our family safe.” 

She fixes Eda with a flinty look, “I’m sorry that you disapprove. But this is the decision that _we_ have made. You don’t have to like it.” Drawing herself up to her full height, which barely reaches Eda’s nose, she says, “Now. I’d thank you kindly to _get out of my house._ ”

Eda looks speechless. “ _Your_ house?! This is Luz’s house! I have always been welcome here!”

“Luz isn’t here!” Amity barely notices the tears running down her face now, the dull ache in her heart at those words. “You can’t just come in here screaming at me and expect me to take it lying down! Now, get out!”

Amity walks forward until she is right up in Eda’s face. She holds the older woman’s gaze and finally, Eda growls, whirls on one foot and marches out the front door. Amity races after her, slamming it shut.

She leans her head against the door’s cool, unforgiving surface and tries to swallow around the sudden lump in her throat. _Great work, Amity,_ she thinks, _you’ve just banished one of the only parental figures you’ve had who_ wasn’t _terrible._

She turns her head to gaze at the huge painting resting over the fireplace. A smiling Luz wraps a proud arm around her wife while Amity gazes lovingly at her and cradles their daughter. Amity’s tears are easing now. She sniffs loudly and brushes the remaining droplets away irritably.

“What would you do, Luz? What would you have me do?”

She sighs deeply and runs a frustrated hand through her hair.

“How am I supposed to make her understand? I’m doing this for you. To give you what _you_ need. To keep you safe. To keep the kids safe.”

A single tear rolled down her cheek.

“How am I supposed to do this without you?

“How am I supposed to keep going?”

  
  


“How am I supposed to live my life without you in it?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks as usual to [Maxrimus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maxrimus/pseuds/Maxrimus) for being my second pair of eyes on this. If you haven't read his story You Are Worth Being Loved yet, then you really should!
> 
> Thanks for reading and please let me know what you thought!


	7. No One Is Alone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As a very white person who doesn’t speak Spanish, I’ve been keeping the amount I use in this story fairly limited. For this chapter however, it felt really important to me that I step up. I have tried to do justice to the language and to Luz and Camila’s culture as Dominican Republicans, but I am very, very open to criticism and feedback. I am also super aware that anything I have written here is from an outsider’s perspective and I have done my best to honour that.
> 
> All that said, I hope you can all enjoy this chapter.
> 
> Translations are in the end notes.

**55**

The golden rays of a bright autumnal morning pierce the gloom. They glide across the floor, twirling to pick up dust motes which dance and swirl in their warmth. They tumble over white skin which glows at their touch. They flit through flowing locks of bronze, pulling out hints of copper and rose-gold in their wake.

The rays fall across long, delicate lashes causing them to flutter open and reveal eyes of molten gold. The woman blinks slowly. She yawns and raises a hand to rub sleepily at bleary eyes while her other arm reaches out above her to brush against the ornate headboard. Her back arches into the bed as she stretches and lets out a soft grumbling groan of displeasure at finding herself awake.

A soft chuckle tickles her ear and she turns to meet warm brown eyes dancing with amusement. Luz lies on her stomach with her head propped up on her hands as she smiles down at her.

“Buenos dias, amor. How did you sleep?"

“No.” Amity mumbles. “Go away, ‘m not awake.” Despite her words, she rolls towards her wife and nuzzles against her.

She feels Luz chuckle again, feels the whisper of lips brush against her forehead but resolutely keeps her eyes closed. Her slender arms worm around Luz’s waist to hold her tight. Luz pulls away, causing Amity to growl and grumble in protest, but she simply shifts her weight and flops on to her side so she is facing Amity. Smiling, she tugs Amity into her arms and runs light fingers up and down her spine, leaving tendrils of fire in their wake.

Amity presses against her, wanting to be closer - no, even closer - but also wanting to be asleep. Her hand reaches up to sleepily toy with Luz’s hair and Luz smiles as the hand clenches briefly to yank playfully at her short curly locks.

Amity hums as Luz presses gentle kisses against her neck. She is surprised by a sound - not quite a gasp, not quite a moan - escaping her lips as Luz bites down.

“Luz,” she mumbles, half in protest and Luz smiles against her skin. Releasing it, she presses a gentle kiss to the spot and Amity feels the wet rasp of a tongue caress the swiftly forming bruise.

“Luz!” She laughs, pushing her away good-naturedly. Still laughing, they press their foreheads together. Their bodies shift and intertwine and soon neither one knows where one ends and the other begins. Gold eyes lock lovingly with brown and flutter shut as one body is lowered to fit perfectly against another.

Amity can feel the welcome pressure of Luz’s body against every inch of her own. The touch of her lips resonate through her, sending delicious shivers of pleasure racing from their joined lips through her body, and down to the tips of her toes. She pushes against her, up into the kiss and opens her mouth to welcome the delicate swirl of Luz’s tongue. Groaning softly into her mouth, Amity reaches up and desperate fingers twist in soft fabric, tugging Luz closer.

Drawing back enough to breathe, lips brush against lips with each whispered word, “This is my favourite way to start the day.” Amity smirks and drags her nails down Luz’s back. Her lips twitch in pleasure as the action causes Luz to groan and arch against her.

Luz wrests herself away to gaze through heavy lashes at Amity’s flushed and panting face. She smiles and presses a loving kiss to her forehead. One hand traces its way up her body, its touch soft like butterfly wings against soft skin. Their eyes meet and hold as Luz’s hand paints hot fire across her abdomen, and Amity’s hips twist upwards in unconscious desire. The hand lingers, just for a moment, before pulling away as Luz suddenly leaps out of bed with a laugh as Amity spits curses and tries in vain to catch her.

“Nope! Ya amaneció! Up you get!”

Amity frowns and flops back onto the bed with an audible thump, “Titan, you are such a tease!”

“Maaaybe! But I’m  _ your _ tease.” She grins cheekily and flashes a wink at her pouting partner as she pulls on a pair of jeans before tugging a white t-shirt with a cartoon purple otter and the words ‘otterly adorable’ over her head.

A muffled, grumbling groan is her only reply.

She turns and sees that Amity has rolled over and hidden her head under the blankets, her butt sticking up slightly in the air. Leaning over, Luz steals a quick squeeze before yanking the blankets off of her wife as Amity squeaks in protest. She adroitly sidesteps a soft projectile as a pillow sails past her to hit the far wall with a quiet thump.

Her laughter rings in Amity’s ears as she finally sits up in bed. She arches into another bone cracking stretch that she feels click its way up her spine. A different click draws her attention and she looks up to see Luz bearing a poorly hidden grin and her scroll. Luz’s smile softens and she sits on the edge of the bed next to Amity. Immediately, Amity turns so she can press against Luz's back and lean all of her weight onto her. Resting her chin on Luz’s shoulder and draping her arms around her, she peers down at the scroll. 

“Ugh,” She mumbles in disgust, “Too bright.”

Luz chuckles and dims the scroll, before holding it closer to Amity’s face. Amity smiles at the image. Her long bronze hair is a tangled mussed up bird’s nest, and her face is scrunched in a tongue-curling yawn. Between her black singlet and the blankets pooled around her waist, a tiny sliver of fair skin peeks out. Her back is arched and her hands are clenched into tiny fists twisting high over her head. Despite the glimpse of skin, and the red flush of arousal and frustration still on her face, there is a softness to the image. An innocence.

“You look so cute.” Luz says, gazing fondly at the image.

“Mmmm,” mumbles Amity, pressing a chaste kiss against Luz’s shoulder. Her hands reaching out to trace the gentle swell of muscle in strong arms.

Luz turns further towards her and her hand wraps Amity’s knee in a gentle squeeze. “Te amo.” She says, squeezing again softly. 

Amity gasps as their lips collide and the passion simmering below the surface threatens to boil over once more. 

The moment is shattered by the insistent, shrill call of a ring tone. Pulling away reluctantly, Luz glances down at her scroll but the screen remains dark. Amity sighs and summons her own scroll, but it too is not the source of the obnoxious noise.

Exchanging puzzled looks, Luz clambers to her feet and begins her search. Amity simply watches with a soft, amused smile gracing her face as her wife tilts her ear towards the sound and allows it to lead her, ear-first, about the room. Finally, she reaches into the bottom drawer of a low dresser and rummages around blindly for a moment.

“Ah hah!” She yells in triumph as her hand emerges clutching a simple phone. Then she stares at it in confusion. “It’s an unknown number.” She looks at Amity, “But only Mami has this number. Who could it be?”

“There’s only one way to find out.” Amity urges.

Hesitantly, Luz accepts the call and presses the phone to her ear.

“Hello?”

Amity sighs heavily and tunes out the sound of Luz and the tinny voice she can just hear from the phone. She climbs clumsily out of bed, shaking a leg to divest herself of the tangled nest of sheets. She quickly changes into fresh clothing - nothing fancy, just simple black dress cinched at the waist with purple - and begins making the bed.

She is retrieving the errant pillow from near the wall when she hears a soft thud. She turns and her heart stutters and clenches in her chest. Luz is slumped to her knees, her arms hanging limply at her sides. The phone lies forgotten, still clenched in her hand as the sharp metallic voice continues to break the hush that has fallen over the room.

“Luz!” She flings herself onto her knees and Luz looks up at her with vacant eyes. Her stare shifts past Amity, moves through her as though she held no substance at all.

Quivering fingers quest out tentatively and Amity gently plucks the phone from Luz’s hand. With her eyes locked on Luz’s face, she lifts it to her ear. “She’ll call you back.” She says and hangs up, abruptly silencing the voice.

Taking each of Luz’s hands in hers, she squeezes gently, two warm pulses. “Luz. Mi amor. Talk to me.”

Luz blinks and her eyes focus for just a second on Amity’s face. Amity lifts trembling fingers to brush hot tears away from Luz’s cheek.

“Luz de mi vida, háblame por favor.”

Brown eyes, so warm with love and affection just moments ago, now lie cold and empty. Amity falls into the deep shadows and feels the pain throbbing within them, feels the darkness begging for relief.

Luz’s voice calls out from that darkness and Amity has never heard her sound so small, so lost and alone. Luz is not sorrow and uncertainty. She is laughter and colour. She is loud and confident. She is full of life and fervour. Luz is light. 

But now her tiny voice rings out across the stillness.

“Mami used to call me that.”

And Amity’s heart shatters.

***

The storms of autumn are wild and untamable.

The rolling grey tumult of the sea blends into a dark colourless sky. The wind howls in fury as it whips up spray and buffets the small crowd gathered on the cliff’s edge. Rain thunders down to lash harmlessly against an invisible barrier high overhead.

A dozen witches stand vigil around the small gathering, representatives from every coven. They stand with their backs to the crowd, their attention focused on holding the shield in place.

Luz fixes her eyes on the horizon. She absently tugs at her raincoat collar, pulling it up to protect against the wind’s bitter chill. As her hand falls to her side, graceful fingers entwine with hers. She smiles absently and sends two gentle pulses through their joined hands. She imagines each pulse tracing its way up Amity’s arm, into her torso and reaching up to warm her heart. Tearing her eyes from the vista, she smiles sadly at her love.

Her wife looks tiny. Thick woolen clothing swaddles her willowy body. A rosy nose and pink cheeks emerge reluctantly from a thick scarf wrapped tightly around her neck and face. But it is not the layers of clothing swamping her frame that makes her look small. It is the desolation in her eyes.

Luz can’t bring herself to feel anything for herself right now. The emotions are too big and unwieldy, too terrifying. But for her wife, for her family? For them, she can find strength. For them, she can find solace.

For them, she can.

Gently untangling their fingers, she wraps her arm loosely around Amity and pulls her close. Amity snuggles into her rangy frame and Luz shivers slightly as a cold nose is pressed against her bare neck.

“Lo siento, amor.” Amity mumbles against her skin. Luz hugs her tighter. She thinks that if she can hold Amity tight enough, maybe then she won’t fall apart. Maybe then the parts of her that are threatening to shatter can stay whole. And she needs to stay whole right now. Silently, Luz presses a kiss to Amity’s temple and looks to the rest of those gathered with them.

Her gaze darts past the concerned expressions on Willow and Gus’ faces, past Eda’s despondence, and rests on a young woman. Her long mint hair has been wrestled into a tight braid but some tendrils have escaped to frame large golden eyes and warm, brown skin. A tall man stands pressed against her back, a shock of fiery red hair whipping about his pale, almost colourless, face. He cradles her protectively in his arms, reaching down with both hands to reverently caress the small bump protruding from her abdomen. 

Azure’s hands mindlessly stroke her husband’s fingers where they rest on her stomach. Her tear-soaked face turns to the heavens and she wishes, just for a moment, that the shield would fail, that she could feel the hot, cleansing stain of water on her face. But the shield does not fail and they are not in the Human Realm where rain would bring relief rather than screams. Azure sighs and her gaze is caught by her mom’s dark eyes.

Azure absent-mindedly worries her lip with pointed teeth - a terrible habit she had picked up as a teen and had almost trained herself out of it. There is no emotion in her mom’s eyes. Where she expected to see pain and sadness, perhaps even rage, all she sees is a blank canvas. A woman going through the motions.

Azure’s gaze rolls past her mom and settles on her mother, curled protectively against Luz. As though sensing her presence, golden eyes meet and there is a wordless exchange of concern.

_ Luz is not ok. _

Luz gently squeezes Amity around the waist before releasing her to step towards the yawning edge of the cliff. Smiling grimly, she opens the silver canister cradled in her hand. Luz swallows around a dry lump in her mouth. She grasps for something to say, some words that carry enough weight for this moment. But there are none.

Her steady hand surprises even her as she slowly pours half the canister’s contents towards the sea.

Then her eyes fly open in horror as the capricious wind captures her mother’s ashes and swoops towards her. She flinches, turning away and praying to any gods present that she is not about to swallow a handful of her mother. Any gods who happen to be passing by stay silent on the matter. But Amity does not. Quick as lightning, a spell is cast and the turbulent wind is swiftly muzzled and brought to submission. It limps away reluctantly, floating down to the water’s edge and off into the grey unknown.

Luz heaves a sigh of relief as a part of her mother flies away to mingle with the Boiling Isles forever.

The canister hangs heavy in her grip as she returns to her loved ones. Amity steps forward and slips her hand back into place and a cold that Luz had not yet noticed recedes just a little. She smiles sadly at her wife and squeezes her hand twice -  _ te amo  _ \- before feeling two soft pulses in return.

***

The dry lump is clawing Luz’s throat again. Her eyes flit around the living room, taking in the changes she and Amity had rushed to make. Dozens of autumnal flowers - enough to open a florist boutique - are gracefully scattered amid framed photographs and paintings. The images depict Camila’s life. Here and there, Luz can spot polaroids where the more traditional images have been supplemented with the memories of witches. Candles of every shape and colour bathe the room in a warm amber glow that flickers gently as the storm continues to pelt the walls and roof. Turning her gaze towards the ceiling, she looks up and watches the glowing orbs she and Amity had lit earlier to complement the candlelight. Luz hears the soft clearing of a throat and she can feel the gentle weight of Amity’s gaze on her back, the warm caress of her love tempered by the bitter tang of concern and fear.

Luz coughs slightly and steps forward, suddenly self-conscious in front of her assembled loved ones.

“Thank you all for joining us.” Her voice is stiff, robotic, not like Luz at all. “We- I wanted to celebrate Mami’s life with you all. Her- our people believe that tonight, at midnight, her spirit will pass through the celebration to say farewell before moving on.” 

Luz blushes, and feels the flickering flames of guilt and shame ignite in her chest. The degree of separation between her and her culture had never really bothered her before, but with Mami gone, the reality is thrown into stark relief. She knows so little about her own culture, her own traditions and practices. All she has are some frantically Googled articles and half-formed memories of attending her abuela’s funeral as a child.

Taking a deep breath, Luz squares her shoulders. She’ll do her best. For Mami. For her family. And maybe after, maybe then she can learn more, teach more to her child and future grandchild.

Luz takes a moment to fill a glass, before raising it in Camila’s honour. “ Salud!” She says with forced cheer before downing the amber liquid.

A chorus of ‘salud’ and ‘cheers’ reaches her ears and a small smile grows on her face. From across the room, Amity’s gaze is captured by Willow’s and the two women exchange a meaningful look. Both had noticed the smile had done nothing to soften the despair in Luz’s eyes.

As Gus steps forward to tell an involved story about the time Camila rescued him from nearly being arrested in the Human Realm, Luz slips away from the gathering. Amity watches her go and exchanges another look with Willow before following her wife into the kitchen.

“Luz?”

Luz looks up from where she had been leaning against the counter. She smiles that dead smile again. “Lo siento, amor. How are you doing?”

Amity gives a soft humourless chuckle, “Shouldn’t I be the one asking you that?”

Her wife avoids her eyes, “You loved her just as much as me. Perhaps more even. What with your parents and all…” she waves her hands limply “I know that Mami, Mom, and Lilith became parents to you. I know how important that is- was.”

“Oh, Luz.” Amity steps forward with arms outstretched. She hovers for a second, half afraid that Luz will reject her comfort and Luz does hesitate before opening her arms wide and pulling Amity into her warm embrace. 

“There’s no such thing as more or less when it comes to love.” Says Amity. “Love just is. You know that.” She stands on her tiptoes and kisses the corner of Luz’s jaw, the only place she can reach when Luz stands up straight.

Amity feels a deep shudder reverberate through the woman she loves. “ Háblame , love. Please. Let me in.”

She feels Luz’s arms wrap tighter around her, enveloping her tiny frame in an all-encompassing hug. Luz buries her head into Amity’s shoulder and just… holds her. She is silent for so long that Amity thinks maybe she won’t speak, that maybe being here with her is all she can do right now. That maybe that will be enough. But then Luz starts speaking. Her voice is low, a soft murmur in her ear. Her words are for Amity alone.

“I just… I think maybe I’m broken. Like, I should be feeling sad, but I’m not. I’m angry and I’m upset. And I’m worried. Ever since I got the news I’ve been non-stop worrying. About you. About Eda. About Azure.”

She falls silent and Amity simply tightens her grip on Luz’s shirt, feels the thick soft weave of the fabric bunch under her nails.

“I feel like I’m letting her down.” Luz admits. “Like I should know more about where I come from. Like I should know more about her. Like I’m doing this all wrong.”

Amity presses a kiss to Luz’s cheek but stays silent.

“And I keep searching for the right thing to say or do and I... have no idea. And I know… I know that she would know  _ exactly _ what to do.”

Luz blinks in surprise as she feels a wave building inside her. It bubbles up to her chest and grasps her throat.

She chokes, “I just miss my mami.”

“I know, baby. I know”

Amity holds Luz as she cries for the first time since hearing the news that her mother is dead. She sobs silently, gasping for air, safe in her wife’s arms.

When the river slows and the wave within begins to ebb, Amity draws back enough that she can press her forehead to Luz’s.

“Luz,” she says seriously, gazing deep into her lover’s eyes. “There’s no wrong or right way to do this. It sucks and it’s painful. And maybe one day it will hurt a little less. But not today, and not any day soon. Right now, we’re all just doing our best. And that is enough.”

“Whatever you need right now is ok. Whatever you give right now is enough. You don’t need to be doing any more or less for anyone right now, except perhaps yourself. You are allowed to feel whatever you feel right now.”

Luz smiles wetly and gives a small chuckle. “How did you get so wise?”

Amity smiles back at her, “From you.”

She reaches down and weaves her fingers with Luz’s. Softly she squeezes twice and feels the gentle reply. “Are you ready to go back?”

Luz nods, holding her close for one more moment before stepping away. Hands still clasped, they return to the lounge feeling maybe just a little lighter than before.

A quiet air holds the lounge hostage, but the low buzz of chatter cuts the air as their friends and family swap memories and stories. Looking around, Luz nods decisively and drops Amity’s hand gently, stepping forward to speak to their daughter in a soft murmur. Amity watches with interest as Azure hugs her mother and steps away. She returns shortly with a guitar in one hand and a violin and bow in the other.

Without preamble, Luz takes a seat in the corner and begins to  [ play ](https://youtu.be/uz1X-6jUqh0?t=24) . Azure pulls a chair up next to her mom and expertly draws back on the violin bowstring. Luz’s low voice picks up the melody and Azure’s high sweet voice weaves in and out. The room falls silent as the two play their soft refrain.

_ Mother cannot guide you _ _  
_ _ Now you're on your own _ _  
_ _ Only me beside you _ _  
_ _ Still, you're not alone _ _  
_ _ No one is alone. Truly _ _  
_ _ No one is alone _

_ I wish _ _  
_ _ I know _

Amity closes her eyes and smiles softly as Willow and Gus move to stand with her. The trio lean against one another as they watch their loved ones spin their sorrow into music. Amity feels the gentle weight of Luz’s gaze settle about her like a warm winter’s cloak. She hesitates and then joins her voice to the chorus. Willow’s low alto and the quiet rumble of Gus’ bass join the harmony soon after.

_ Mother isn't here now _ _  
_ _ Wrong things, right things _ _  
_ _ Who knows what she'd say? _ _  
_ _ Who can say what's true? _ _  
_ _ Nothings quite so clear now _

_ Do things, fight things _ _  
_ _ Feel you've lost your way? _

_ You decide, but _ _  
_ _ You are not alone _

_ Believe me _

_ No one is alone. _

The  music plays late into the night. Sad songs. Happy songs. Mournful, wistful songs. Luz doesn’t stop playing and singing except to drink. Eventually, Azure carefully places her violin in its case and silently escapes the noisy room. She makes her way upstairs and pushes open a door. She walks slowly through the room, idly running a finger along the spines of books. Finally she sits on the bed and picks up a soft toy, cradling it in her arms. A tiny squeak emits from the rabbit. She strokes its fur absently. Purple fur, faded with time and love, is soft under her fingertips. She pulls at a loose thread for a moment, lingers over a button replacing an eye.

“Yeah, Cam got you that when you were just a baby. It used to be your mom's.” A shadow moves from the hallway to lean against the door. Eda shook back long grey hair and smoothed her svelte black dress before crossing the room to sit with Azure.

“How you doing, kid?”

“I’m worried about mom.”

Eda sighs, “I asked about you.”

“I…” Azure hesitates and then leans her head on her grandmother’s shoulder. “Eda, I miss her.”

She slings an arm around Azure’s shoulder, “Me too, kid.”

They sit in silence for a long moment. Then Azure places one slender hand on her middle, “She never got to meet her great-grandchild. My baby will never know her.”

Eda looks around the room and takes a deep breath before speaking. “They will know her through us, through the stories we share. It’s not enough, but it’s something.”

Azure sighs and shifts uncomfortably. Her pregnancy had been an easy one thus far, but she still tired easily and the day had been long. Eda notices. “Come here,” she says, shuffling backwards to make more room. Azure curls up on her childhood bed with her grandmother’s lap for a pillow and smiles as she feels nostalgia run through her. "I feel like a little kid." She admits. Eda tuts, "You are a little kid," and gently unbraids Azure's hair before running her long, talon-like nails through it, scratching lightly at her scalp.

King found them there, hours later. The evening was drawing to a close and midnight was fast approaching. He looks at the sleeping woman and then at his long-time companion. Then, without a word, he quickly clambers up her body, digging his feet and claws into her painfully before nestling himself into her wild hair.

“Family dinners are going to be a lot quieter, King.” Eda says softly.

He hums in quiet agreement.

“Who’s going to argue with me about the kid now? Who’s going to try and get the best gifts, cook the best meals?”

He lets out a soft hweh, “I guess that means you... win?”

“Yeah... I won…”

And silence rushes in between the two old friends.

“I’m going to miss her, King.”

“Yeah. Me too.”

***

For Luz, it seemed as though midnight came and went quickly that night. She could not tell you if she felt her mother’s passing but after an evening of tears and memories and sadness and joy and music and laughter, an evening surrounded by all the people who matter most to her, she did feel a change. She felt a lightness. The weight, the heaviness, remained but it was lifted somewhat.

She felt… lighter.

***

With the warm orange hues of the setting sun caressing their backs, Luz and Amity walk hand in hand along the ocean’s shore. They are alone on the beach with nothing but the impish wind tugging at their hair and clothes for company. The soft sand is surprisingly cold under foot and Luz smiles as she relishes in the strange pleasure of grains making their way between her toes.

It had taken her and Amity far too long to make this trip, but maybe that was for the best. The heaviness in Luz’s heart had receded a little with each passing day and a lightness had returned to her step. A lightness that let her be here in this moment. She casts her gaze to the woman walking next to her and smiles fondly, grateful to have Amity at her side in this as she is in all things.

There were still days when the heaviness returned with a sharpness that stole away her breath, days when tears weren’t enough. But with Amity at her side those days are merely painful, not insurmountable.

_ Together, we can get through anything. _

At some unspoken signal, they turn to face the gently lapping waves. Luz places the silver canister she carries at her feet and slowly begins to roll up her pants. She retrieves the canister and begins to walk out into the soft surf. Fingers lace with hers, gently pulling her to a stop. Amity quietly slips off one sandal, then another before taking Luz’s hand in hers once more and stepping into the water. She flinches as the frigid waves lap about her ankles but smiles through the cold.

Hand in hand, they step out into the waves. Water splashes at Amity’s simple skirt and soaks into the rolled up cuffs of Luz’s linen pants.

Luz reclaims her hand briefly so as to open the canister before slipping it back into Amity’s. She looks out to sea. Out there, somewhere to the southeast, is the land where her mother was born. Luz hopes that her ashes can make their way home again.

As she pours the container into the endless ebb and flow of the tide, Luz gives Amity’s hand two gentle squeezes.  _ Te amo. _

Amity’s hand squeezes back.  _ Te amo. _

Luz smiles as she watches the water twisting about their feet. Tears well in her eyes and she lets them fall.

“Te quiero, mami. I’ll miss you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations:  
> “Ya amaneció!” - It’s morning already!  
> “Luz de mi vida. Háblame por favor” - Light of my life, speak to me please.  
> “Salud” - Toast ‘to your health’  
> “Te amo” - I love you, generally used romantically  
> “Te quiero” - I love you, generally used to friends and family
> 
> Please, please let me know if I've made any errors.
> 
> And please leave a comment, I'd love to hear what you all think of this chapter.  
> Thank you as usual to [Maxrimus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maxrimus/pseuds/Maxrimus). Honestly, dude I don't know how I'd write this without your help!


	8. I'm Getting Older Too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh wow, a wild chapter appears!
> 
> I am so sorry it has taken me this long to update, for some reason I really struggled with writing this chapter. But I got there in the end.  
> Anyway, I hope you have all stayed safe and well over the holiday period and are enjoying welcoming in the new year. Here's hoping 2021 behaves itself!
> 
> Now, on to the story. I believe I promised people fluff?

**54**

The house on the hill glows in the harsh light of the early summer morning sun. Golden rays blaze down to flicker through windows and light up the lingering gloom of the night before. It’s warmth floods through the open bedroom window on the second floor. It flows like molten gold across the floor and onto the bed to fall across the slumbering figures of two women.

Their limbs are helplessly entangled with one another and even in their sleep they twist protectively around each other, arms holding each other tight.

The light blares across the closed eyelids of the taller of the two and she flinches, clenches her eyes shut tighter and buries her face in the tangled hair of her sleeping partner. The movement causes the other woman to wake and she too blinks in frustration at the jarring light of day. Grumbling in displeasure, she pulls the other woman flush against her body as she rolls onto her back and hides from the light’s intrusion in the shadow of her lover.

The taller woman blinks at this, smiles down at her and brings their lips together in a soft, searing kiss which causes molten fire to ignite and trickle down her spine to the tips of her toes.

Tingling pleasantly, Amity pushes back against Luz’s lips and hums in happiness.

Luz smiles against her lips and pushes up slightly to rest her forehead against Amity’s, “This is my favourite way to start the day.”

Amity smirks at her, “I’ve heard that before.”

Luz kisses her nose playfully. “And you’ll hear it again!” She peppers Amity’s face with kisses, tracing along her sharp jawline and up to her sensitive ears. She nips gently and chuckles as they twitch away from her and flatten against Amity’s skull in irritation.

“Luuuz, cut it out,” she mumbles sleepily, but Luz just chuckles low in her ear and gently traces the sharp outline with her tongue. Her teeth are featherlight as they drag a soft moan from the ear’s owner. The ear twitches and reddens a moment later and Luz smiles to herself.

Shifting her weight slightly, she turns her attention to Amity’s neck and mumbles against soft white skin, “I love how sensitive your ears are. I love that even after all of these years, I can still make you blush.”

Amity hums in embarrassed irritation and rising tension. Her lips twist into a pout as she tries to hide a smile. Then she gasps and twitches as Luz’s tongue and teeth nip at a sensitive patch of skin, causing fire to pool in her stomach. Her wife’s oral exploration continues down her throat, across slender shoulders and collarbones sharp enough to cut paper. Luz lets out her own low hum of pleasure as she finds the soft dip between the collarbones at the base of the neck and nuzzles her nose into it. Smiling, she breathes in the familiar musky scent she finds there.

“This is my favourite place to be,” she mumbles against the delicately flushing skin of her wife. Suddenly she pauses and glances up at Amity with a suggestive wink, “Well, one of them anyway.”

Amity’s head flops back against the pillow and she reaches up to tangle her hands through Luz’s hair, urging her to continue her oral expedition south.

Amity’s attention is briefly diverted when she hears a small yip and a scratch at the door. She gasps as Luz’s fingers caress a particularly ticklish spot, “Not now, Vox! We’re busy!”

With laughter and smiles, Luz continues to kiss and nip Amity’s body while her teasing fingers dance across smooth skin. She moves slowly, deliberately, avoiding those spots where she knows Amity wants - needs - her most. They have time this morning and Luz intends to make the most of it.

Repositioning her body with the blankets tented over her head, she draws gasps and shudders from her love as she continues her careful ministrations across Amity’s belly. She can feel her partner whimpering now, grinding helplessly against nothing in desperate search of relief and Luz feels that familiar rush that comes from knowing she and she alone can do this, can bring this powerful, beautiful woman to the brink of desperation… and that they can tumble over that edge together.

“Luz!” Amity’s voice is sharp, needy. She’s getting annoyed now, Luz can tell. She knows Amity loves it when Luz teases her, but also knows it drives her absolutely wild. “Just hurry up already.”

“But don’t you love it when I tease you? Don’t you…”

“Mija, we’re here!” The bedroom door banged open and Amity instinctively kicked Luz away from her with a yelp as she rushed to cover herself with the blanket. Luz fell to the floor with a thump and her thoroughly tousled head slowly peeked out above the bed. A vindicated Vox sits in the doorway, and gives Amity a pointed look before turning away with a sharp huff. As they trot down the stairs, one of their ebony heads swivels round to briefly stick a small pink tongue out at the pair, making Amity frown and Luz hide a smile. Lechuza chirps disapprovingly before swooping away after the small fox.

Quickly moving to shield her friend’s eyes, Eda leans against the doorframe with a dangerous grin, “And here I thought that I’d stop walking in on this kind of malarkey once you were older!”

“Moooms!” Luz yelled, thoroughly red-faced and scandalised. Meanwhile, Amity was turning a pretty shade of pink and appeared to be attempting to evaporate through willpower alone. “What are you even doing here? Haven’t you heard of knocking?”

“Did you forget your own birthday again, kiddo?”

“And Amity told us to come over at 9am so we could all have breakfast together.”

Luz casts an accusing glance at her wife who pulls the blanket up to her nose in an attempt to hide her flushing cheeks. “Oops.” Her pointed ears hang low against her head as she mumbles into the fabric, “Is it 9 already?”

“A quarter past, even,” Cami said with a playful smile. Unlike Eda, she has mostly managed to avoid being scandalised by the pair over the years. “I guess we should count ourselves lucky that we decided to come upstairs now rather than in 15 minutes. We would have been really blinded then!”

“Mami!”

“Alright, alright, we’ll leave you two to get dressed. Don’t take your time though, you have guests coming over and I am not above sending them upstairs to fetch you!”

Eda laughs, “If we have to be scarred, then so does everyone else?”

“Exactly,” Camila says with a chuckle.

“I knew there was a reason I like you, Cami.”

Eda turns to her silver-haired companion and offers her a gallant arm to guide the elderly woman back downstairs. As they retreat, a trail of teasing laughter and gentle jibes is left in their wake. Luz and Amity exchange red-faced looks. Reaching up to scratch the back of her head, Luz chuckles nervously, “Titan, I feel like a teenager again.”

“I often feel like a teenager around you, mi amor.” Amity replies, still tomato-red but smiling. She leans back in for a chaste kiss, but even this is interrupted as a loud clatter and a thump makes its way up the stairs.

“I’m okay!” A familiar voice calls.

Camila’s voice is sharp as she chides her erstwhile companion, “You’re not okay! Your head fell off! _Again._ ”

“Pfft, decapitation is a perfectly natural part of life for witches. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

“If you say so, Loba. Just keep your head out of the batter.”

Luz chuckles under her breath and presses a gentle kiss against Amity’s shoulder, “We’d better get down there before Eda breaks something.”

“Or before Camila breaks Eda!”

***

When Luz and Amity emerge from their bedroom an _entirely acceptable_ amount of time later, they are greeted by a scene of restrained domestic chaos.

Camila has laid claim to the chair at the head of the kitchen table and is reigning supreme with an iron fist. King stands at her side, imperiously waving a wooden spoon and repeating every order she gives in high, nasal tones. Amity reflects on how the usually mild-mannered woman tends to develop a spine of steel when it comes to three things: her family, her work, and - most important of all - _the kitchen_. She barks out orders left and right while Lilith and Eda rush to fulfill her every will.

A gargantuan mountain of food is slowly appearing under Camila’s watchful eye with lashings of bacon, leaning towers of pancakes, a small fortress of toast, and a hillock of scrambled eggs.

The two younger women exchange an amused glance as they linger silently in the doorway. But their presence is announced when Amity lets out a small undignified snort as she watches the literal _Empress of the Boiling Isles_ get scolded for burning the latest batch of tostones.

Instantly, Camila’s steely gaze captures them, “Mija, don’t think you can stand back watching just because it’s your birthday! And Amity, querida, I see you hiding there too! Come help set the table.”

“Yes, Mama.” Luz says obediently, but she dashes in amongst the hubbub to press a soft kiss to her mother’s silvery hair. Amity smiles too and pops an ironic salute before rushing to obey.

Before long, the table is set and Amity takes a moment to lean back on her heels and just breathe. As she does so, her gaze flickers skyward and she smiles in amusement when she spots two small owls and a raven huddled together on the rafters overhead. Catching Luz’s eyes, she motions upwards and Luz’s smile meets her own.

Stepping into Amity’s embrace, Luz grins and presses a soft kiss against her cheek, “What do you think those three are gossiping about?”

“I’m more concerned about where Vox has gotten off to?” Amity says with a wry smile, causing Luz to chuckle. It caused Luz no end of amusement that her serious wife’s palisman was the biggest troublemaker she had ever met - and considering the competition, that was really saying something!

Looking around, she gently nudged said-wife in the ribs, “There they are.” Amity follows Luz’s nod and spots her cheeky fox palisman under the kitchen table.

“What the Titan are they doing down there?” But Amity’s question is swiftly answered. She and Luz watch in stunned silence as Camila carefully swipes a piece of bacon from the table and palms it off to the little creature. One of Vox’s ebony heads snatches the offering from her hand while the other tussles playfully with their ear and attempts to steal a bite. A second piece is stolen and proffered to King; the ebullient demon having long since abdicated his throne in favour of tummy scratches and a spot on Camila’s lap.

Laughing, Amity turns to her wife, “Es una buenaza, verdad?”

A rare peace hangs in the air as a comforting blanket of warmth and love and affection wraps around the eclectic family and holds them in thrall. Into that warmth, a cacophony of laughter and light explodes as the kitchen door bursts open. A mud-splattered Edric tumbles into the room first, dragging a blushing and slightly dishevelled Jerbo who waves awkwardly at those assembled. He is followed by an equally messy Viney who bounces into the room and immediately sweeps Luz up into a bone-cracking hug, spinning the taller woman around with a chuckle.

“It’s your birthday today!” She sings breathlessly.

Behind Viney, the always immaculate and fashionably attired Emira glides into the room and slings a sly arm over Amity’s shoulder. Glancing at her sister, they exchange a fond, exasperated smile over their lovers’ antics. Then Amity smirks and pushes Emira’s arm off her shoulder.

“So, how long exactly were you standing outside waiting to make sure all the work was finished?”

Emira grins back, “Only 20 minutes. We managed to get a good impromptu game of grudgby going actually.”

“Grudgby? Don’t you need at least 6 for that?”

At that moment a familiar dark-haired woman sticks her head through the door, accompanied by a tall Black man. The woman is dressed casually in deep green homespun pants and a simple cream blouse, but the man is resplendent in a patchwork suit of reds, greens, and browns.

“Room for two more?” The man asks.

Camila chuckles, “For you two troublemakers? Always. Now, get over here and give me a hug!”

Laughing, Gus and Willow make their way over to the woman and fondly fall into a group hug. Luz quickly wrestles her way out of Viney’s embrace so she can flop over the threesome with a smile.

Amity’s own lips twinge as she watches the woman she has pledged her life to. No matter how old she gets, she knows that Luz will always be quintessentially Luz. Feeling her gaze, Luz picks herself up and dances across the kitchen. Scuffing her bare feet slightly on the worn tiles, she enthusiastically pulls Amity over to join the cuddle pile. Amity’s cheeks are beginning to hurt from the force of her smile and she laughs when she hears a small click. Emira winks at her before forwarding the image to their group chat and banishing her scroll.

In the chaos of hugs and greetings, Edric stands with a look of passionate love crossing his features. He gazes with enamoured desperation at the objects of his affections and Jerbo keeps a firm arm around his waist to keep him from descending on the food. Ed absent-mindedly wipes a small trickle of drool from the corner of his mouth before asking in plaintive tones, “Are we waiting for anyone else, or can we get to the eating?!”

“Just us,” a shy voice announces from the doorway and Luz and Amity break out in radiant smiles.

A handsome couple stand framed in the doorway. Her long mint-coloured hair is pulled back from her face in a flipped low ponytail and it clashes gloriously with the fiery red curls sported by her hulking partner. Innis flashes a small smile at the room before stooping slightly in order to fit through the door frame. As he does so, he drops his much shorter wife’s hand and she flies across the room towards her parents.

Azure winks as she darts past them to give Camila an enthusiastic hug. “I need to say good morning to the most important people first, right Abuela?”

Luz laughs good naturedly as she waits patiently for her daughter to turn and wrap her arms around her.

“Happy birthday, Mami,” she murmurs in Luz’s ear before turning to wrap her mother in a hug as well.

“Well, now that everyone is here,” Amity says with a pointed look at Edric, “ _Now,_ we can eat.”

The crowd quickly gathers around the table and, after some friendly squabbling over seating arrangements, descends upon the food mountain like a horde of locusts. Lilith, Amity, and Camila exchange an exasperated look across the chaos. Even after all these years, they are still not used to the sight of this unruly family at dinner time. Once they would have made an attempt to remind their loved ones of their manners but they have long since given this up as futile. Amity absently uses a handkerchief to dab a sliver of syrup from Luz’s chin and reflects on how grateful she is that her wife’s manners improve drastically when she is away from their extended family. She eyes her brother distastefully as he and Luz begin tossing tostones between them, attempting to capture them in the air.

“You are a terrible influence on each other.” She remarks softly to no one. Luz flashes her a quick wink before throwing her arms in the air in victory after successfully catching a piece of flying fruit. Amity coughs slightly to hide a chuckle but she knows that Luz has heard her amusement.

The conversation ebbs and flows over the delighted sounds of furious mastication. Finally, with a groan, each person pushes back from the table, leaning heavily in their chairs; many of them now cradling their sated and protruding bellies.

“Man, do you know how to cook, Camila!” Gus announces to the room.

“Yep,” Edric agrees, letting loose a long burp. He blushes furiously, “Er, excuse me.” And the table erupts in laughter. Camila casts him a look of faux disapproval but can only hold the expression for a moment before she too joins the uproarious mirth.

Eda claps her hands brusquely, “Right! You six are on cleaning duty,” she says pointing at the Blight twins, Viney, Jerbo, Gus, and Willow. “Don’t think we didn’t notice your little grudgby match outside. You’re going to have to get up a lot earlier than that to put one past us!” She says gesturing to herself, Lilith, and Camila, the three women sporting near identical smirks.

“We can’t really blame them, Eda.” Camila says soothingly. “After all, they’re just fortunate they missed the show we were almost treated to this morning.”

“Mami!” Luz yells in mock-outrage as Amity turns a delicate shade of pink.

“Ew.” Azure comments quietly as she sips daintily from her mug.

***

“Gus?” Luz yells into the kitchen, “We need you to help set up the projection.”

Gus obediently wanders through into the lounge. He has rolled up his sleeves and donned an apron to protect his suit. The yellow of the apron clashes garishly against his multi-hued suit and has the phrase ‘Kitchen Witch’ incongruously emblazoned upon it. He quickly takes the apron off and tosses it over a chair carelessly. Amity frowns at him and banishes it with a simple spell circle.

“I’ve shown you how to do this so many times, Luz. It even works with glyphs!”

“I know, but you’re just so much better at it than I am,” she counters with a winning grin.

Gus smiles back and walks over to the small oracle ball that has been pain-stakingly linked up to a human device called a Blue Ray. With an elaborate flourish, he creates a blue spell circle and points it at the empty wall in front of him. Immediately, the title screen of a familiar movie appears before him.

“We’re watching _Coco_ again? I mean, I know it’s good, Luz, but that’s like five years in a row.”

“Look, it’s a really good movie okay?”

Shaking her head at their playful bickering, Amity returns to the kitchen and begins fetching the horde of movie snacks they had prepared earlier for the annual marathon. Summoning a low table, she begins laying out bowls of popcorn, chips, and rotten candy, plates of cookies and thornberry mini-muffins, setting them down alongside an unholy amount of wrappers containing various chocolates and gummy treats.

Once she is satisfied with the lavish spread, she settles into the couch, nestling snugly between her wife and daughter. Eventually the rest of their rowdy family ceases their rough-housing and squabbling over chairs and couches and bean bags and they begin to settle down. With everyone suitably comfortable, Luz flashes one more smile around the room before extinguishing the lights and starting the movie.

***

After _Coco_ , the family had blazed through _Lilo and Stitch_ and straight into _Into the Woods_ \- “The Broadway production, thank you very much,” said Luz - before finally finishing with a bootleg copy of _Wicked._ Not a single eye - not even Eda’s famously dry, heterochromatic ones - had managed to escape the marathon without emitting a sob.

Lunch had been pulled out and devoured as the movies were consumed. Luz had laughed and sung along with _every_ single song despite her daughter’s playful attempts at smothering her with a pillow.

Now Luz leans against the front door and sighs deeply as she watches her friends and family wander away. Amity puts her arm around her and chuckles as she hears the stringent tones of a small argument brewing between Viney and Emira over the portrayal of witches in _Wicked._

“I just think that the humans could have done a better portrayal of witches! It’s sexist and kinda queer-baity.”

“It’s just a musical, Viney! From ages ago! Why can’t we just enjoy nice things?”

Ignoring the familiar tiff, Amity turns to their daughter, “Will you be joining us for dinner, querida?”

Azure smiles at her mother before casting a beatific look skywards at her husband, “No, we can’t stay long. But we’d love to have a cup of tea before we go, if you all have time?”

“Of course!” Luz beams.

They gather in the kitchen. Camila is seated by the window, she looks tired, wan and pale. The day’s festivities are beginning to have their toll on her but she is smiling nonetheless. Eda hovers anxiously nearby, unconvincingly pretending that she isn’t hovering. Lilith has claimed a chair at the table where her palisman has alighted on her shoulder to nuzzle into her hair. She smiles and laughs with King, who stands atop the table, wooden spoon once more in hand. Luz takes a seat next to them and laughs together with Lilith at King’s antics.

Amity smiles as she watches her family, the people she loves most in two worlds. She quickly pours out mugs of tea, coffee, and mulled apple blood before turning quizzical eyes to her daughter. 

She lingers in the doorway with Innis, clutching his hand nervously in hers. He holds her eyes with his and smiles encouragingly at her.

Luz notices their daughter’s uncharacteristic behaviour too. “Is everything ok, Azure?”

The room falls silent immediately as every head turns to stare at the young woman who blushes furiously.

“Er, yes, it is. I mean… that is, we have an announcement to make.”

She glances up at Innis again and he flashes her a loving smile before squeezing her hand gently.

“We’re having a baby.”

The room immediately erupts in cheers. Luz and Amity are the first to swing their daughter up into their arms while the rest clamor around demanding hugs of their own.

Luz wraps Innis up into a huge bear hug that somehow lifts the comically larger man off his feet. Amity simply smiles at him and pats his arm in congratulations.

“We’re so happy for you both.”

Azure breaks free from the hubbub and makes her way over to her grandmother who has remained a still oasis amid the chaos.

“Abuela?”

She has tears in her eyes, “I’m going to be a bisabuela?! This is wonderful news! I am so happy for you, nieta.”

“Thank you, abuelita! I can’t wait for you to meet them.”

“Do you know how far along you are?”

“Just five weeks, we have an appointment with the midwitch next week so we’ll find out the exact due date then. But, for now, we’re thinking we’ll be joined by a witchling of our very own next winter!”

“That’s so exciting, mija!” Luz is beaming, “But why on the Boiling Isles were you nervous about telling us?”

Azure blushes, “Oh, you know, I just don’t like talking about…” And she mumbles something quietly under her breath.

“What?”

“I don’t like talking about sex.”

“What?”

“She said she doesn’t like talking about sex,” Innis explained helpfully. “I’ve told her it’s nothing to be ashamed of, but…” he shrugs.

Luz and Amity exchange slightly embarrassed looks, _did we accidentally scar our child?_ But Azure smiles and places a hand on each of their arms.

“It just feels really personal and intimate talking about this and about having a baby and becoming parents. It’s scary!” Then she grins playfully, “I also really didn’t want to take the spotlight away from Mami too much today!”

“As if you could do that, nieta!” Camila butts in with a chuckle.

The family gathers round for another hug and are about to continue laughing and gossiping when they are interrupted by a loud “ _AHEM_.”

“Do you mean to tell me that soon, very soon, I shall have another soldier for my _Legion of Darkness_!?”

“Er, yes?”

“Wonderful! I must inform Francois immediately so we can begin preparations!” And King hurls himself off the table, onto the floor and runs away as fast as his tiny legs can carry him. The room is silent for a moment before they all burst into uproarious laughter.

“We’d better get off after him before he causes too much property damage,” Eda says, “Plus we should probably be getting you home, Cam. Unless you’d rather stay at the Owl House tonight?”

Camila smiles fondly and hides a wince, “Perhaps that would be for the best. It’s a long way back home and I can always return in the morning.”

“Then we shall bid the two of you adieu,” Lilith says as she offers them a sweeping bow. “Enjoy the rest of your evening.”

“Feliz cumpleaños, Luz.”

“Yeah, happy birthday, kid.”

“We need to head off too, Mami. But you’ll come to our midwitch appointment?”

“You want us there?” asked Luz, feeling touched.

“Of course!” Innis rumbled, “Azure made me make sure it was on a day you were both available just so you could join us.”

“Then we will be there,” Amity says sweetly. “We’re so happy for you, love.”

“The two of you are going to make such wonderful parents.”

***

“Alone at last,” Luz says with a smile and a wink at her wife. They stand still for a moment, savoring the silence and hush in the air. And then Luz lunges for her wife, hands outstretched and fingers wiggling.

“No, get away from me!” Amity cries, but there is a smile on her face as she skips away from her lover’s tickling fingers.

They race through the house, laughing and whooping like teenagers. Luz suddenly screeches to a halt as they race past the entrance to their library. Flashing a grin at Amity, she charges into the room at full speed before dropping to her knees and sliding along the floor to land near their piano. 

Amity leans against the library door and chuckles. “That really hurt you, didn’t it?”

Luz gets up with an exaggerated groan and rubs her knees ruefully, “Yes.”

“Still think it was worth it?”

“Yes.”

They chuckle and Luz holds out a hand to Amity, “Dance with me, amor.”

“Always.”

Amity smirks and casts a quick spell which floods the room with [ music ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rUuusqy50yk). She steps forward languidly, the insistent beat pulsing in every step as she falls into Luz’s arms.

Together, they glide gracefully through the room. Amity’s face lights up as she feels the music thrumming in her veins and the gentle touch of Luz’s hands against her body. The knowing look in her lover’s eye as she pulls their bodies flush against one another sends a cascade of shivers trickling down her spine. Dancing has always felt so intuitive between them, like they were meant to be, meant to dance together forever.

On and on they dance and, as the shadows lengthen and night begins to fall in earnest, they slowly come to a gentle halt. Their arms shift and soon they are in a softly swaying embrace, Amity’s head tucked into Luz’s chest.

“Was it a good birthday?”

“Best birthday.”

Amity smiles, “You say that every year.”

“That’s because every year is better than the last.” Luz lifts her head to look down at her. “Every year with you is better than the last, mi amor.”

They kiss softly, sweetly, tasting the tenderness in each other’s hearts. Fire flares and their kiss deepens. Luz’s mouth falls open and she gasps at the sensation of Amity’s tongue caressing her own.

As lungs begin to cry out for air, they break reluctantly apart, pressing their foreheads together. They lean there for a moment, breathing deeply, sharing one another’s air and enjoying the closeness.

Then Luz’s stomach lets out a deafening gurgle and they dissolve into belly-splitting laughter.

“I guess we should feed you.”

“I guess we should!”

***

Looking across the table, Luz cannot help but marvel at her wife’s beauty. The soft flicker of pink candlelight casts a rosy hue across Amity’s face, turning her bronze hair copper. Golden eyes shine with affection as Amity reaches across the table to caress brown skin. Their fingers link and intertwine, stroking gently across pads and calluses.

Without breaking eye contact, Amity lifts their hands to her face and presses a tender kiss against Luz’s skin. 

Luz presses two soft squeezes into the fingers held delicately in hers. _Te amo._ And smiles when she feels the answering call.

Her eyes slip away from Amity’s and out the window. In daylight, she would see a glorious view out across Bonesborough to the sea but now that night has truly fallen all she can see is her own reflection gazing back at her.

She stares deeply into her own eyes.

Amity watches in surprise as a line begins to crease between Luz’s brows and she shifts closer to her, reaching out to smooth it away with her thumb.

“Luz?”

Brown eyes meet gold before flittering away, back to the dark expanse of glass before them.

Amity follows Luz’s gaze, “What do you see, amor?” She returns her eyes to her wife’s face, concern growing in her breast with each passing moment.

Luz is silent for so long that Amity thinks perhaps she didn’t hear the question. She is about to repeat herself when Luz murmurs something so quietly Amity almost misses it.

“I’m getting older.”

Amity quirks one perfect eyebrow quizzically.

She bites back an instinctive sarcastic response, _Yes, it happens every year too._ She isn’t sure why this is suddenly causing Luz concern, but she knows now is not the time to be making jokes.

“I _look_ older.”

Amity returns her attention to the mirror-like window. Silver dusts Luz’s hair now where once there had been none. The barest whisper of lines caress her face and there is a heaviness to her frame which once had been whipcord lean.

“I don’t understand.” She confesses.

“I look older. And you… don’t.”

“But Luz, you’re beautiful.”

“I’m old!” Luz snaps back in a rare moment of self-recrimination.

Amity gets to her feet and, still clutching Luz’s hand in her own, moves to kneel before her wife with her back to the window.

“You’re beautiful.” She reaches up to stroke Luz’s hair but Luz flinches away from her touch. “You look more beautiful each and every day. You make me speechless with how beautiful you are.”

“I’m aging.” She frowns at her wife, “It won’t be long until I look old enough to be your mother. Will you still think I’m beautiful then?”

“Yes.”

“How can you though? How can you possibly still find me attractive when you’re… _you._ Beautiful and unchanged. Will you want me when my hair has all turned to grey, when my face is covered in wrinkles, when I need help just to get up from my chair?!”

“Yes.”

“ _How?_ ” Tears are running down Luz’s face now. “How can you be sure?”

“Because I love you. I think I always have and I know I always will.” Amity reaches up to grasp Luz’s chin in sure fingers, guiding her face to lock brown eyes with gold. “I love you for more than your body and I always will. You are more than your looks.”

Luz closes her eyes and a sob wracks her body.

“But Titan knows, I do love your looks. I love that I know your body better than my own. That I can feel as it shifts and changes through the years. I love the silver in your hair and how distinguished you look. I love the lines around your mouth and how I can count each and every laugh and smile that caused them. I love that _I_ caused so many of them, just by making you happy, by loving you. I love that you still excite me each and every single day, that you can set me on fire with just a word, just a glance, just a touch.”

Luz leans forward in her seat and pushes her forehead against Amity’s.

“I love you,” she whispers through her tears.

“I love _you_ ,” Amity replies. “And I always will.”

***

Amity Noceda is still awake. 

The first chime of the Bonesborough Clock Tower echoes through the still night air as Amity stares at the ceiling and counts the chimes to 13. The blissful release of sleep has eluded her this evening. It has wafted tantalisingly at the corner of her vision, pulled at her heavy limbs. And yet...

She is still awake.

And she thinks she knows why. She huffs under her breath and flips noiselessly onto her side to face Luz.

Her wife is sprawled out on her back, her arms flung carelessly above her head, one leg twisting over Amity’s own while the other is thrown out from the blankets. Amity smiles as she watches the reassuring rise and fall of Luz’s chest. She has always likened Luz’s sleep to that of a child, deep, boneless, and precious. Something to be protected. Amity can - and has had to upon occasion - rearrange her limbs or roll her off her back when she snores too loudly and Luz will simply slumber on. She has even managed to pick Luz up once or twice and carry her, staggering under her weight, from the lounge to their room. And through it all, Luz has always continued cutting logs unbothered.

It amuses Amity that, after decades, Luz still doesn’t quite believe her about the snoring.

Luz lets out a low, snuffling honk and Amity stifles a chuckle. Her eyes caress Luz’s sleeping form and she smiles as she lets her gaze dance up to the hopelessly tousled nest of hair atop her head. 

Her smile fades slightly as she sees that gentle twist of silver, the hint of lines here and there.

She wasn’t lying before. 

Amity thinks these things make her wife even more beautiful, even more stunning. Luz never fails to take her breath away each and every single day. And she doesn’t think that will ever stop.

And yet…

Seeing Camila today. Seeing her looking so _frail_. Amity cannot help but feel tendrils of fear lick at her spine. She shivers slightly before gathering the blankets closer to her body and cuddling into Luz.

_Best not to think about it._ She decides.

So she tries.

Tries not to think about her wife getting older. 

Tries not to think about what that means.

And she fails.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translation:  
> “Es una buenaza, verdad?” - She’s such a soft touch, isn’t she?
> 
> Outfits:  
> Gus’ outfit: [https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0234/5963/products/08_29_Christmas_GuysSuits_IMG_5136-Edit.jpg?v=1605133227](https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0234/5963/products/08_29_Christmas_GuysSuits_IMG_5136-Edit.jpg?v=1605133227)
> 
> Look, before you get mad. I'm me. And if it didn't have a soupçon of angst, is it even really a One Lifetime is Enough chapter? Do I even have totally angst-free chapters planned? *checks outline* I thiiiiiiink so?
> 
> Thanks Maxrimus as always for being an amazing beta reader :)


	9. Our Little Girl

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m actually quite proud of this chapter, so I’m really hoping you all enjoy it too. Also, I kinda feel like you all deserve this chapter after the hard slog we’ve had through all of that pain and sorrow.
> 
> Thank you everyone for reading this far. I really never thought I would be able to write as big a story as this, especially having not written anything for five years. And thank you especially to Maxrimus for being an amazing friend and beta reader. I enjoyed all the keyboard smashes you gave this one.
> 
> So!  
> Since you’ve eaten all of your angsty veggies, I reckon you’ve earned yourselves some delicious and fluffy dessert.
> 
> Update: 22/01/21  
> Check out this beautiful commission by Marimo. You can see more of her wonderful art on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/MarimoJenn).
> 
> Thanks for the wonderful Christmas present, Maxrimus!

**49**

She stands in the doorway, contemplating the room before her. The hazy light of a grey and dreary morning filters through a window in the hallway to dance up the lithe, stealthy form of a shadowy figure. The shadow stalks her prey with large, exaggerated steps; her feet skim lightly across the luxuriously carpeted floor as she expertly avoids floorboards that might groan in irritation at her passing.

The woman in the doorway pretends not to notice the approaching shadow, but, as the taller figure swoops down on her, she turns swiftly and places one pale finger firmly against smiling lips.

“Shhh,” she says softly. Turning back to observe the room, she leans all of her weight into the comforting warmth of her wife’s body. Luz wraps her arms tightly around the smaller woman and props her chin on Amity’s crown. 

Together, they gaze fondly upon the room’s sole occupant. The dim sunlight peers hesitantly into the room through a crack in the tightly drawn curtains. It lights up to reveal a child’s bedroom. Hand drawn posters and paintings, crudely but lovingly crafted, are pinned here and there on the walls. Soft toys are a prominent feature, with dozens of different animals and colours occupying every surface in the room. A huge bookcase groans under the weight of various knick-knacks and young adult novels. A nearby desk is littered with paper and drawing utensils.

Luz and Amity shift their eyes from the room’s childish decor to the slumbering figure ensconced in blankets. And, despite the faded purple rabbit clutched in her arms, this is no child. Luz gives Amity’s waist a gentle squeeze and whispers reverently in her ear, “Our little girl is all grown up.”

Amity smiles and nuzzles her face into Luz’s neck, kissing the soft skin she finds there. “I can barely believe it.”

Amity’s hand trails down the length of Luz’s arm to caress her hand. She steps forwards, into the room, but allows her hand to linger in Luz’s fingers until the last possible moment. Smiling over her shoulder at her lover, Amity sits on the edge of the bed by her sleeping daughter. Smiling softly, she reaches out and tucks a strand of mint hair behind one pointed ear before resting her hand warmly on the 20 year-old’s shoulder.

“Azure? Sweetheart? You asked us to wake you at 7.”

Azure stirs in her sleep, swimming back through dreams towards consciousness. Finally, she sits up and yawns. Blearily clutching her purple rabbit to her breast, she rubs her eyes with the back of her hand and Amity hears Luz bite back a sound from the doorway at how cute their daughter looks in that moment.

“Mom?” Azure asks, still dazed with sleep. “Just five more minutes.”

Amity glances to the doorway and meets Luz’s amused eyes, “Well, we could let you sleep in, if that’s what you really want.”

Luz walks across the room and kneels on the floor as Azure slumps back into her bedclothes and pulls a blanket over her head. “Yeah,” she says with a cheeky grin, “You just sleep in and get your beauty rest. It’s not as though there’s anything important happening today.”

“Exactly,” agrees Amity, playing along, “It’s only your wedding, after all.”

Azure’s head emerges from the sheets and she gives her parents an unamused look, “What?” Then, recognition dawns and she leaps out of bed in a rush, knocking both Amity and Luz over in her hurry. “I’m getting married today!” Then she sits just as suddenly and her eyes widen dramatically. “I’m getting married today.” She says woodenly.

“Mom, I’m getting married today.”

“I know, sweetheart.” Amity says with an indulgent smile as she rights herself on the bed.

Azure turns to her mother and grabs both her hands in her own, “But what if everything goes wrong? What if it rains? Or if Innis changes his mind? What if Abuelita can’t make it to the ceremony? What if I forget my dress?”

“Querida.” Luz cuts through the tirade with a calm, firm tone as she watches her daughter start to whip herself into a frenzy. “Take a deep breath for me. That’s it. In for four, hold for seven. Good girl. Now, out for eight.”

Amity strokes Azure’s hand soothingly while Luz wraps an arm around her shoulders. They watch and breath in solidarity with her while she attempts to ground herself.

“Better?”

Azure gives a tiny nod, “A bit.” She acknowledges. “It’s just… I want this day to be perfect.”

“What do we say to perfection, love?” Amity asks her daughter.

Azure answered obediently, repeating the words she has learned by rote, “Perfection is not reality. Reality is messy and unpredictable. And that’s okay.”

Amity finishes in unison with her daughter, “You do not need to be perfect to be enough. You are valid and you are loved.”

Azure smiles shyly at her parents, “I love you.”

Luz smiles back warmly, “We love you too. We’re so proud of you and of who you’ve become. And we’re excited to welcome Innis into the family.”

“I know that perfection isn’t real… but, what if today is a disaster?”

“What’s the bare minimum you need for today to be a good day?”

“Innis.” Azure answers immediately. “We’re together and we love each other and we begin the next chapter of our lives together.”

Amity smiles encouragingly at her daughter, “Disasters will come or not. What matters most, what you’ll remember most, is the feeling of being there with the love of your life.” Her eyes meet fleetingly with Luz’s, “I promise you, once you see him there, nothing else will matter.”

“Besides,” Luz grins, “Have you forgotten that you put Willow in charge? There’s no way she’d let anything go wrong!”

A miniscule smile is beginning to grow on Azure’s pretty face, “You’re probably right.” 

She hesitates and bites her lip. “If I’m being really honest, I’m also… I’m a bit nervous about the ceremony. About speaking in front of so many people.”

Amity squeezes her daughter’s hand, “The only person who _needs_ to hear what you have to say is Innis.”

Luz covered both their hands with her own, “Anyone else who hears is a bonus!” She squeezes the hands under hers. “And don’t you worry about your Abuelita. She would _never_ miss today. Eda is picking her up and she will be there, come Hell or highwater, monster or monsoon.”

Sandwiching their daughter in a cuddle, Amity and Luz hold her tight for a long moment. A very long moment.

The moment stretches out and finally Azure begins to shuffle uncomfortably. “Er, moms? I should probably start getting ready.”

Luz looks at Amity and grins, “Just five more minutes.”

***

Luz smiles and hums to herself as her bare feet dance across the cool kitchen floor. Pulling out her scroll, she quickly selects her _Mami’s Tunes_ playlist and presses [ play](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5E7yuLsgXOE). 

Luz’s hips begin to sway to the beat of the bachata while she pours oil in a skillet and sets it to heat, before turning to bread the queso fritos. Setting the cheese to fry, she then switches her attention to finishing the mangú she started last night. Heating the plantains through, she mashes them until they are creamy and smooth. Then, she dances across the kitchen, throwing in a couple of spins for good measure. She checks on the cheese and sets up a new frying pan for the eggs and salami.

She is plating up their breakfast and topping it with avocado when she hears movement and slender white arms encircle her waist. Turning in her wife’s arms, they fall into the bachata together and Luz is _so glad_ they took the time to learn this dance when they were younger. She pulls Amity close and their hips sway smoothly in time to the music. Luz loves dancing like this with Amity. She loves the way it flows, the call and response of their movements, the synchronicity between them. She loves how their feelings emerge through the dip and sway of their bodies. Some days it is all passion and steamy looks, others it is a quiet, smoldering affection, others a tingling, longing sensation. Today is a mixture of passion and affection and she can feel her love for this woman seep from her very pores with every step.

There is a sudden throat clearing and the music stops abruptly. Laughing, Luz turns to face her daughter. Azure has a slightly horrified look on her face. 

“Moooooms.” She mutters in displeasure, but Luz can hear the hidden smile in her tone, “We have _talked_ about the dancing. If I am present, there will be no salsa, no tango, no bachata,” she continues ticking off dance styles as she speaks, “no meringue, no rumba, or any other remotely se… Look, just don’t dance like that if I’m around. Stick to a waltz or swing or something.”

Luz laughs and reaches out to pull her daughter into a tangled embrace with her and Amity. “Oh my poor darling! Are we _embarrassing_ you?”

“Yes.” She replies smartly, but there is a twinge to her lip and a twinkle in her eye that suggests happiness at her parent’s delight. In fact, Azure looks to her parents as role models for married life and secretly hopes that she and Innis will be as enamoured of each other after 25 years as her parents are.

Luz turns her attention to her daughter’s hair, “Give us a spin then, princesa.”

Azure steps away from the family snuggle to oblige with a slight blush and her mother hums her approval. “Ay, Amity, you did a wonderful job. You look beautiful, Azure.”

Azure blushes again, “You really think it looks good?” She nervously touches her newly styled hair. She feels sophisticated and elegant, almost regal. It is a new feeling for her.

Luz nods vigorously and says, “You look like a faerie princess, mija.”

Amity smiles and squeezes her arms around Luz in a show of affection, before leaning up to steal a chaste kiss. Stepping lightly away, she gently takes her daughter’s hand and guides her to a seat. Luz places her food before her and the couple share a smile.

“Eat up,” Luz implores her daughter.

Azure eyes the small mountain of food nervously. “It looks delicious, Mami, but to be quite honest… I actually feel a bit sick.”

Amity smiles at her daughter and squeezes her shoulder reassuringly. With an elegant flick of her wrist, she summons a drink for her daughter and places it before her. “Sip this slowly, love. It has lemon and ginger in it to settle your stomach. But you do need to eat, at least a little.”

Luz smiles gently, “The last thing we need today is a fainting bride.”

Placing the popular Dominican breakfast dish before her daughter, she hands Amity hers and takes a seat. Luz loves the delicious meal, but they only have mangú tres golpes on special occasions as the ingredients can be hard to come by on the Boiling Isles; her daughter’s wedding certainly qualifies as such an occasion.

Obediently taking a sip of her drink and a tentative bite of the mashed plantain, Azure pauses and gives her parents a calculating look. “Moms?”

Luz smiles at her around a mouthful of queso frito and Amity quirks one elegant eyebrow at her.

“What’s it like?”

“What’s what like?” Asks Luz.

“Being married. Did it... change things?”

Luz and Amity exchange a surprised look.

“Well,” says Luz, thinking about it. “It kind of changed everything…”

“And nothing,” Amity finishes, “at the same time.”

“We were already living together when we got married and had already been together for,” She looks at her wife for confirmation, “seven years?”

“Eight,” Amity clarifies, with a smirk.

“So not a lot changed on the day-to-day basis.”

“But everything felt…”

“More somehow.” Luz finishes. “I used to be having dinner with my girlfriend, my fiancée, but suddenly I was having dinner with my wife.”

“I think - for us, at least - it brought us even closer together.” Amity’s gaze is gentle and she reaches out to squeeze her daughter’s hand fondly. “But that’s what marriage has meant to us. You and Innis will need to work out what it means to the two of you.”

***

Azure surprised herself by managing to eat almost all of her breakfast despite her frayed nerves; the familiar food and bittersweet drink went a long way towards soothing her. When she finally pushed her plate away, she saw looks of approval flicker across her parents’ faces.

“Do you still want me to help you with your make-up, love?”

“Yes please, Mom.”

Heading back upstairs, Amity helps Azure carefully don her dress while Luz hovers in the background attempting to look helpful. Once clothed, she wraps herself in a thin cotton robe to protect her dress and then wraps a soft towel around her shoulders for good measure.

“Ready?” Asks Amity.

“Ready.”

“Oh shit! I was totally meant to be taking photographs this whole time,” Luz cries suddenly, pulling out her scroll and beginning to snap photographs.

“This is nice,” Amity says, leaning in to apply foundation. “I’m glad we get to spend this morning with just the three of us.”

Holding very still while her mother finishes with the concealer, Azure attempts to speak without jostling her, “Yeah, it’s really nice. Thanks, Mom.”

Luz looks up and flashes a quick grin, then she pushes a button and her scroll flashes too as it takes multiple pictures.

“Mami...” Azure says, embarrassed.

Luz just starts laughing and clicking even faster, taking more photos. Affecting a silly accent, she gets in nice and close to her wife and daughter. 

“Beautiful, simply beautiful! Now, give me gorgeous! Gorgeous, oh you’re good at this! Ooo okay, now give me sexy. Work it girls! Perfect! Oh, ok, now give me annoyed... Yep, that’s annoyed alright.” She quickly drops the accent. “Okay, I’ll stop.” 

She grins sheepishly and rubs the back of her head with one hand. “Sorry, loves. Got a bit carried away there.”

Amity raises one perfectly coiffed eyebrow at her wife, before turning to put the final finishing touches on Azure’s make up. Luz feels a slight blush climb her cheeks and busies herself with looking at the photos she has taken. “You know,” she says hesitantly, “some of these are actually really good.”

Amity chuckles and then delicately pecks Azure on the forehead, “You’re all done. And you look beautiful, sweetheart.”

“I do?”

“You do.” Her parents agree together.

“Let’s see the whole look, mija.”

Blushing deeply, Azure stands and removes the towel and her over-robe. 

Normally, Azure wears her long mint hair rather simply, but today Amity has helped her pull it into a twist so that it tucks in on itself just above her neck. Then Amity had braided a series of small flowers of peaches and creams along the twist so that it looks like half of a flower crown cascading down her head. One long tendril has come loose from the twist and hangs down to frame her elegant features. As always, the light green of her natural hair colour nicely complements the warm undertones of her dark skin. Her make-up is understated and natural. A hint of colour pops in the pale green eyeshadow to accent her golden eyes.

Allowing her gaze to wander from Azure’s face and hair, Luz feels tears begin to well as she takes in her daughter’s wedding gown for the first time. The dress had been Amity and Azure’s thing. _And by Titan, they did a good job._ Blindly, she reaches out to clasp Amity’s hand in hers and squeezes tightly. Then she turns to Azure and murmurs, “You look stunning, princesa.”

The white floor length gown contrasts beautifully against her brown skin. The gown gathers under Azure’s bust in an empire waistline before the chiffon flows down, over her hips, to graze gently against the floor. Luz’s smile widens as she spots pale green canvas sneakers peeking out from below her daughter’s skirts. The gown features an embroidered bodice in a sweetheart neckline that flows up and over her shoulders and, as Azure spins, Luz can see that the embroidery leaves part of the back open. Thick white ribbon laces the dress up to complete the look.

Luz leans over and kisses her wife on the cheek, then she winks at her daughter. “I think Innis is going to be speechless.”

***

Camila eyes the stormy clouds warily. They gather on the horizon and mutter moodily amongst themselves. Light flashes and the boom of thunder can be heard cracking out across the Boiling Sea.

“I don’t suppose witches know weather magic?” She asks her companion who is busily laying out chairs.

Eda stands and cracks her back loudly before holding one manicured hand above her eyes and looking to the sky.

“Afraid not.” Turning, she calls out to the stocky witch wielding a clipboard like a shield against the small group of caterers and musicians and decorators in front of her. Her shoulder-length dark hair is tucked behind one ear by a pen and, despite her defensive use of the clipboard, her expression remains serene amid the chaos. “Willow!” Eda barks out sharply. Once she has the witch’s attention, she points to the horizon.

Irritation flickers across Willow’s previously tranquil face and she takes a moment to indulge in a rare curse. “Titan’s balls!” She swears. “Alright people! You all know what you need to do, get out of my way. Beta team, I need you to set up those glyphs on the perimeter like we discussed. The first sign of rainfall, I want whoever is closest to activate the master glyph.” 

As the undisputed master of her craft, Luz had painstakingly drawn several forcefield glyphs and tied them to one larger trigger glyph. Once activated, the master glyph would set off every other glyph in turn which would combine to create a giant forcefield over the event. Despite many botched attempts, Luz was still the only living witch able to pull off something this intricate through the use of glyphs and Willow was grateful for it. Casting a forcefield over an area this large would require at least a half dozen witches and would be a constant drain on their resources and energy.

Camila watches the normally passive Willow bark out orders to bring the disarray back under control through sheer willpower alone. Turning back to Eda, she smiles, “It looks like Willow has everything well in hand.”

Eda grins wolfishly, “Well, what do you expect from the youngest coven leader in history and one of the foremost leaders of the Revolution? No mere wedding is a match for that kid!”

Camila hums softly in reply. Pausing in her work laying out chairs, Eda glances at her friend. Despite her diminished height, Eda has never really thought of Camila as a small woman; her energy and calming presence easily fills any space she is in. She seems small now though. Camila is swaddled in blankets and warm clothing and is reclining regally in a floating chair. The chair has separate foot rests and the left one is raised to elevate Camila’s foot. Eda allows her gaze to linger for a moment too long and Camila smirks at her. “I’m _fine_ , Loba.”

Eda blushes slightly and snaps, “I know that! I was just wondering how best to steal that chair after you’re done lazing around in it.”

Allowing her smirk to grow even wider, Camila gives her friend a knowing look, “Sure.” She says, sounding very convinced.

Eda looks away, feeling a little flustered. She knows that Cami really _is_ okay, but she can’t get the image of the rehabilitation facility the other woman has been staying in out of her head. After Camila’s fall and subsequent hip fracture, she had managed to find a centre nearby that took her insurance. Luz, Amity, and even Eda had all offered to help pay, but Camila had stubbornly refused any and all offers of assistance. Her surgery had gone well and her body was healing nicely, but Eda had been somewhat horrified by the conditions her friend was living in. The facility was tiny and lifeless and Cami’s room was even more so. The staff were all burnt out and impersonal. Worst of all - in Eda’s mind, at least - Camila was lonely and bored. Eda had even offered to host the woman at the Owl House while she recovered, but Camila was insistent in staying close to her doctor and the hospital, just in case. She had refused to confirm or deny whether Hooty had played a role in that decision.

Eda’s musing is cut short when a hand reaches out and squeezes her arm. She stares down at the contrast caused by the deep copper of the other woman’s skin against her pearl-white arm. She raises her head and is met with warm and gentle affection. “Eda. I promise, if I needed help, I would ask for it. I am ok.”

Eda nods and briefly covers Camila’s hand with her own, before pulling away abruptly to continue with her task.

***

The distant clouds have shifted to growl and grumble overhead, but it is not until the first tender strains of a violin are heard that the rain begins to fall. Quick as a flash, one young witch dashes for the master glyph on the edge of the clearing and slaps her hand on it. Hard. Hard enough that she has to shake her fingers out while she watches the amber force field spring into action high overhead.

The violinist’s bandmate, a petite and pretty witch with ochre skin and silver hair, is quick to cast a spell circle, instantly amplifying the instrument’s volume. Soon, the heavily falling rain creates a consistent tattoo over which the violin’s sweet refrain sweeps and soars.

Below a tree so massive in proportion that it dwarfs even his bulky figure, Innis waits. He shifts his weight nervously from one well-shod foot to another as he looks out into the sudden gloom. Dozens of orb-like spell lights have been cast about the clearing, their soft glow creating dancing shadows and lending an aura of cosiness to the locale.

Thick fingers anxiously toy with the coarse fabric of his waistcoat, smoothing out imaginary wrinkles. Innis takes a deep breath to centre himself and calms his itching fingers. He closes his eyes and inhales through his nose, imagining the moment when he will finally see her. The moment when she will finally see him. They have kept their wedding clothes a secret, wanting to share in the moment of joy and surprise each will feel. Innis feels confident for once, he thinks he looks good. He is not a vain man by any means, but he is proud of the outfit he has chosen and thinks his wife-to-be will appreciate it greatly.

Opening his eyes, he takes stock of his grey tweed suit and matching vest. He thinks the grey contrasts nicely against the light blue of his linen shirt. He allows himself another moment of jittery fidgeting and straightens his tie and pocket square, both a deep maroon which clashes tastefully against his fiery locks.

Innis ceases his fussing when a warm hand touches his shoulder. He turns his head and meets Willow’s gentle eyes. The older woman is dressed simply but elegantly in green and white and she smiles reassuringly at the nervous groom as she removes her hand.

Just then, the violin reaches a crescendo and trails off sweetly into a new tune, joyous and uplifting and the assembled guests turn as one to gaze upon the bride.

Blushing furiously under the weight of the attention, Azure begins her slow walk towards her future. Sandwiched between her parents, with a hand held delicately in the crook of each woman’s arm, she ignores the crowd and sets her eyes resolutely on the man who is to become her husband. Luz chuckles under her breath and, in a stage whisper, murmurs, “If you thought looking at Innis would cure your blush, you were sadly mistaken, my dear.”

A discordant voice behind the trio whisper-shouts, “Walk slower! Not all of us have long legs!”

Amity looks over her shoulder and smiles indulgently at the tiny, formally dressed demon. King tugs nervously at his bow tie, while his other hand clasps a small bouquet. “You can’t have the wedding without me,” he says, “and don’t you forget it.”

“Of course not, King,” She replies, “You’re the most important bit, after all!”

Amity and Luz slow their steps, pulling Azure in line with them. They both bite back grins as they feel the tension in Azure’s fingertips as she fights back the urge to race down the aisle and hurl herself into her lover’s burly arms.

Innis is star struck as she approaches, as she takes his hands, as she gazes into his eyes and he almost misses his cue as Willow addresses the crowd. Dropping his hands, Azure reaches out one hand in a point. Nerves forgotten, Innis mirrors her and, fingertips pressed against each other, they draw a circle in the air. Once drawn, the spell circle glows golden in the dusk and they clasp their hands within it.

Willow’s voice is a dull roar in Innis’ ears as he loses himself in the golden orbs of his beloved. Willow smirks and nudges his leg subtly with her foot, drawing him back from his reverie.

“I d-do,” He stammers out. And then he is lost again, hopelessly lost in the glory that is her.

Azure manages a little better, but she too trips on the small words, her tongue twisting over on itself in her hurry and glee.

“I do.”

They are dimly aware of King proudly passing a ring to each of them with a grand flourish. Blushes bloom across each face as fumbling hands attempt to slide the ring onto its new home astride the vena amoris.

One sentence cuts through the couple’s fugue state. “You may now kiss each other.” And as their lips meet in a rush, sound floods back into their world. They hear the cheers and applause. They hear the piercing wolf whistle that Luz emits with glee, and the gentle slap of a hand as she is admonished by her wife. Innis can hear the soft sob of his _wife_ as happy tears melt on his face and mingle with his beard. Azure can hear her _husband’s_ happy chuckle bubble up his throat; can feel the curve of his smile against her lips.

It was perfect.

***

Gus’ cheerful voice rings out across the clearing as he announces the newly married couple. Skara gestures to her band and the pianist cracks their fingers, before beginning to [ play](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UQmlzOW-CLY). Soon, the graceful notes of a violin join the piano’s mellow tones. After a moment, Skara nods and moves closer to her microphone.

 _Heart beats fast_ _  
__Colors and promises_ _  
__How to be brave?_ _  
__How can I love when I'm afraid to fall?_ _  
__But watching you stand alone_ _  
__All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow_

_One step closer_

Azure looks in surprise as her partner - _her husband! -_ steps confidently onto the dance floor. Taking her into his arms, he gently guides her into a slow and graceful waltz. As the tempo of the music increases, so too does the rhythm of their dance. She gazes wonderingly at him as he ushers her into a spin before drawing her in close to him once more. And just like that, Azure forgets the eyes upon her and she dances. Innis’ look of concentration is broken only by an adoring smile as the large man adroitly whirls his new wife across the artificial flooring they have laid out beneath the Grom tree.

Watching the pair, safe in the embrace of her lover, Amity gapes in astonishment. “I didn’t know Innis could dance.” She remarks.

Luz smirks. “He couldn’t. But I soon fixed that.”

Golden eyes widen in realization, “Oh, so that’s what you two have been up to!” She chokes back a chuckle unconvincingly, “Azure was so worried when he started ‘working late’ that I had to convince her he wasn’t having an affair!”

She watches as the big man effortlessly lifts their daughter to glide through the air and leans her head back against Luz’s chest. “How many times did he drop you?”

Her wife chuckles darkly, “You don’t want to know. My ass was bruised for weeks!”

They laugh together as they stand, intertwined, and watch their daughter celebrate the beginning of the next chapter of her life. Luz’s slender fingers tickle playfully into Amity’s side as she teasingly whispers in her ear, “Guess what?”

“What?”

“I bet it won’t be long until you’re a Gram… ity.”

Amity groans and elbows Luz in the gut. “That was terrible.”

Luz just laughs, “Oh, you know it's going to stick though.”

“You might be right.”

Amity’s smile fades slightly as she returns her attention to her daughter and her new son-in-law. Leaning back into Luz, she sighs.

Feeling Amity’s mood shift, Luz hugs her tighter against her chest. “I know, love.” She says simply. “I think about her too.”

They need no other words as they bask in the bittersweet feeling that comes from watching their daughter dance through life. Slowly they curve protectively into one another, each providing the other with comfort and love.

“Te amo, Amity.”

Amity responds by pressing a soft kiss against eager lips as her hands press two soft pulses against her back. She bites down gently on Luz’s lip and the taste of sorrow fades slowly. Love rushes in to fill her heart, and Luz’s heady scent fills her nose while their breath mingles together.

Slowly, reluctantly, they pull apart and return their gaze to the dance floor. Light shines in eyes bright with unshed tears of happiness and sorrow and pride and regret all mixed up together. The feelings are so big, so overwhelming that for a moment, Amity’s vision blurs. But then she feels Luz’s hands on her bare skin, stroking up and down her arms and she breathes.

She returns to the moment. Returns to cherish her daughter’s unbridled joy.

And the music comes to a soft end.

Skara waits for the applause to peter out before making her announcement. “The couple of the hour have asked us to play a special song. And they’ve dedicated it to one of the best examples of love they know.”

Closing her eyes, Skara smirks for just a second before taking a deep breath. Her [ voice](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-AhIqpfmwU) rings out like a bell, echoing across the silent clearing.

_Well I found a love for me_

Her graceful melody is then joined by the soft strum of a guitar and the keening cry of the piano.

 _Oh darling, just dive right in and follow my lead_ _  
__Well, I found a girl, beautiful and sweet_ _  
__Oh, I never knew you were the someone waiting for me_

Amity feels Luz chuckle against her back. “I think that’s our cue, mi amor.” 

She smiles, stepping away from her wife and holding out both her hands. Taking them with a beatific smile, Luz allows Amity to guide her out onto the dance floor. The two couples look at one another for just a moment before nodding solemnly and falling into their separate dances. For the older couple, it is as easy and effortless as breathing. For the younger pair, it is fraught with the excitement and anxiety of a new page in their life’s story, an empty chapter for them to fill.

As Amity and Luz swirl around the clearing, they are only dimly aware of the world around and outside of them. Soon there is less room to manoeuvre as more couples take to the floor and it is only through the pair’s experience and wisdom that they do not collide with some of the more novice pairings. 

A smile graces Luz’s lips as she twirls Amity near the edge of the dance floor and catches a glimpse of her smiling mother, a disgruntled Eda standing stalwart at her side. Amity catches a wink from Willow as their graceful duet takes her past the witch’s lively conversation with Gus.

Luz suddenly brings their graceful dance to an abrupt conclusion as she doubles over, laughing fit to burst. Following her eyes, Amity laughs too when she spots three tiny figures nimbly weaving their way through the sea of legs. If it weren’t for the brilliant white of Lechuza’s feathers glowing dimly in the gentle orb light, they might have missed the three palismen. 

Lechuza and Owlbert hop and twirl to the rhythm of the music, their movements elegant and refined. Close behind the pair, Vox dances alone. Their two heads sway to the tune of the music and the tiny fox’s uncoordinated patter of feet brings tears of laughter unbidden to Amity’s eyes. Luz attempts to regain her dignity as she gasps for air, but she quickly loses it again when one of Vox’s heads pounces on their own tail and, gripping it tightly in sharp teeth, spins round on the spot. Vox’s second head follows blindly, their eyes rolling with dizziness as they pirouette in place.

Slowly, the couple regains their poise and straighten, stepping back towards one another. Eyes meet and Luz tries desperately to catch her breath as Amity’s beauty wrests it once more from her control. Golden eyes soften as she draws her wife into a kiss, sharing her breath with the speechless woman.

“I love that, even after all these years, I can still take your breath away.” Amity whispers against delicate lips.

“You always take my breath away.”

***

Predictably, Luz and Amity are the last people on the dance floor. Their limbs are tired and they know they will feel the ache tomorrow but, for now, the evening is far from over.

Azure skips over to them, dragging Innis along behind via their interwoven hands. For the entire evening you could not see one without the other, always within arms reach, glowing with happiness and contentment. Their cheeks are red from exertion and perhaps a little from the alcohol that has flowed this night but if there is an unsteadiness to their gait, then no one will mention it.

Azure flings herself at her parents who catch her, laughing. Luz sweeps her up into her arms and spins her around like when she was a little girl. Amity laughs at the pair and gives Innis a kiss on the cheek. She is startled when a hand gently taps her on the shoulder. Amity turns and is pulled into a bear hug by a beaming Willow. 

Luz, spotting a hug she isn’t in, immediately drops Azure and launches herself at the two women. The trio fall to the floor in a tumble of limbs and laughter. Azure hides a smirk behind her hand as she chuckles and pulls her mother upright. Meanwhile, Innis offers a hand each to Luz and Willow and tugs them to their feet so strongly they almost fly through the air. Righting herself with a laugh and leaning against the big man momentarily for balance, Willow grins at the family. “So, was it everything you wished for?”

“Everything and more, Auntie.” Azure says, stepping forward to tenderly embrace the older woman. “Thank you so much,” she murmurs into her ear. “We couldn’t have done it without you.”

“Probably not.” Willow says with a smirk, causing Luz to chuckle and push her friend playfully.

“So have you decided where your honeymoon will be yet?”

“Yes!” Azure beams, excited and flushed. “Do you remember that beautiful cottage Mom bought out in Armpit Bay? I think you came with us for a couple of summers.”

“Is that the one near Hot Pool Beach?”

“That's the one,” Innis says in his deep rumble.

“It’s a beautiful spot,” Azure continues. “Perfect for a honeymoon.”

“It is.” Luz says, with a smile at her wife. “Just don’t forget to take a shovel so you can enjoy the beach.”

“Won’t it be packed at this time of year?” Asks Willow.

Amity shakes her head, “No, the cabin is really secluded and hard to get to. It basically has its own private stretch of beach.”

“We’re just about to leave now actually,” Innis says softly.

Eyeing her daughter’s euphoric and slightly inebriated state, Amity raises an eyebrow as she looks up at the tall man. “Who’s flying?”

“I am,” he replies, unphased. “I’ve been drinking water for the past three hours.”

“And you’ve eaten?”

“Yes, Mom, he’s eaten!” Azure says, but there is no bite to her words. “We’ll be fine. We just wanted to come say thank you and goodbye.”

“You’re all okay with the clean up?” Innis asks.

The group assures him that the clean up will be no trouble at all and then line up for their final good wishes and goodbyes.

“Have an amazing time, mijita.”

“I will, Mami.”

The trio watch the two witches make a beeline for Ed and Em to thank them for helping with the decorations, the pair then stand up to make a brief, more general farewell to the remaining guests. As soon as the newlyweds leave, Willow snaps into Coven Leader mode.

“Right!” She calls out, “Thank you all so much for coming, we’ve really appreciated having you here. If anyone would like to stay and help us with the clean up, that would be lovely. Otherwise, we wish you a pleasant rest of your evening.”

Swiftly, the band packs up their instruments and Skara drops by for a quiet word with her former Hexmates before disappearing into the gloom. The artificial dance floor is dissolved with a wave of a hand and the chairs and food are quickly tidied away.

Luz spots her parents in a secluded corner near the tree and the tension in Eda’s body quickly sends her scurrying across the clearing to play peacekeeper. “Moms.” She greets them steadily, “Is everything okay?”

“Luz!” Eda snaps. “Will you please tell this stubborn woman that it’s ridiculous to go back to the Human Realm tonight?”

Camila glares back at Eda, “Mija, dile a este idiota que deje a mimarme.”

“You know I don’t speak Human!”

“¡Español!”

Luz looks back and forth between her two mothers in rising panic. She knows better than to take a side, really she does, but… She takes her mother’s hand and murmurs quietly. “Mami…”

“Bah!” Camila says. “Fine, fine. I know when I’m outmatched.” She points a finger at Eda emphatically, “But _she_ is not allowed to treat me like an invalid! Puedo cuidarme sola.”

“Fine!” Eda says shortly, crossing her arms.

Camilla leans back in her chair and crosses her arms too. “Fine!”

“Okay then…” Luz says nervously into the silence. “Now that that’s settled, I guess you should get going then.” She stretches and braves a fake yawn. “It’s getting late after all.”

“Yeah, yeah, kid. You’re hilarious. Alright, we’re going.”

Luz grins and wraps each woman up in a fond hug. “Since you’re staying in the Isles, why don’t we do breakfast tomorrow?”

“If you turned up at the Owl House tomorrow morning - late morning! - then I _suppose_ i could be convinced to do a grocery run.” Eda says with a sigh, fooling nobody.

Luz wiggles her eyebrows, “Plantains from the Human Realm for tostones?” She asks hopefully.

She receives a grunt in response but knows she has won. Luz does a quiet fist pump as Eda turns away from her to summon Owlbert. She then attaches Camila’s floating chair to the staff with a short length of rope.

Rather than watch the two fly away, Luz turns her attention to the quickly emptying clearing and breathes the still night air in deeply. The rain had passed overhead hours ago and now the night is quiet, peaceful. Breathing in again, she savors the petrichor left behind by the rain.

She jumps when hands grab her waist and pull her backwards against a soft body.

“Amity!” She says, laughing and clutching her chest. As she feels arms tighten around her, she relaxes and leans into her shorter wife’s embrace. “Everyone else packed up and gone?” She asks.

“Yeah,” Amity says, pressing her face into Luz’s shoulder blades. “Willow and Gus said goodbye, by the way.”

“Oh good. We’re doing breakfast with Mami and Eda tomorrow. I’ll message them later to see if they want in on the tostones.”

“That does sound good.” Amity mumbles against Luz’s back.

Luz pivots in Amity’s arms to face her and presses a tender kiss to her forehead. Then, with a glance around the empty courtyard, she smiles and pulls away from her love. Quickly she removes her shoes and socks, placing them neatly on the floor. Then, she rolls up her pant legs slightly and shucks off her ecru suit jacket, folding it carefully and placing it atop her shoes. Amity looks at her, a question in her eyes as she rolls up the sleeves of her light purple linen shirt.

Luz turns towards her and Amity blinks, rendered speechless by the sight of her wife in the moonlight. A gentle breeze tousles her curly brown locks and the look in her eyes causes Amity to blush to the tips of her ears. Moonlight halos Luz’s body, creating a soft nimbus around her ecru suit pants and vest. 

Luz smirks and extends a hand towards her. “Well then, if that’s settled, may I have this dance?”

Amity takes her hand and reaches down to slip off her low heels. Luz then tugs her wife, bringing their bodies flush together. Luz’s gaze flickers to Amity’s lips which twist upwards in a confident smile. They clasp hands in a closed waltz position and then they are dancing, skipping, their feet skimming through the warm, wet grass.

Amity closes her eyes and leans her head on Luz’s shoulder as Luz begins to hum and then to sing. Her voice is soft, barely more than a whisper. This song is for Amity and Luz alone.

 _Baby, I'm dancing in the dark, with you between my arms_ _  
__Barefoot on the grass, listening to our favorite song_ _  
__When I saw you in that dress, looking so beautiful_ _  
__I don't deserve this, darling, you look perfect tonight_

Luz’s hand strokes against the lace bodice covering Amity’s back, moving higher to caress her neck, before tangling in soft hair. Tilting her head down, she presses a sweet kiss to Amity’s temple. As she gazes at her wife, she marvels at the woman in her arms and cherishes the gentle swish of her wine-coloured dress against her legs, the gentle press of the hand she holds in hers. 

_Baby, I'm dancing in the dark, with you between my arms_ _  
__Barefoot on the grass, listening to our favorite song_ _  
__I have faith in what I see_ _  
__Now I know I have met an angel in person_  
 _And she looks perfect_ _  
_I don't deserve this

The breeze picks up around them, rustling the leaves overhead. Delicate pink blossoms fall from the sky in a shower around them. Gold locks with brown as they stare deep into one another’s eyes. Luz brings both her hands up to carefully clasp Amity’s face like a treasure and their lips meet in reverential devotion.

Slowly Luz pulls away, just slightly, and presses her forehead against her wife’s. Lips brush lightly against each other like a fluttering of wings as she whispers the song’s final line.

_You look perfect tonight._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations:  
> Mija, dile a este idiota que deje a mimarme - Daughter, tell this idiot to stop fussing over me. (Many thanks to Hyacinth for helping me out with this one! Even if she doesn’t read this fic cause it’s too sad XD)  
> Puedo cuidarme sola - I can take care of myself.
> 
> Outfits:  
> Dress - <https://www.aliexpress.com/item/32717238122.html>  
> Hair - <https://i.pinimg.com/originals/65/6b/b6/656bb61897fcd9f2dfd0562f507f0ed7.jpg>  
> Suit - <https://i.pinimg.com/736x/65/3f/d6/653fd65692a109a49b33ff867576dfd4.jpg>  
> Amity Dress - <https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0305/4482/2408/products/19102304135_66624fb7-af8f-47e7-9875-633763ac9d8f_1024x1024@2x.jpg?v=1579070912>
> 
> Music:  
> Kitchen song: [Dominican Bachata mix](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5E7yuLsgXOE)  
> First song: [A Thousand Years cover by Kurt Hugo Schneider ft. Aimée Proal and Lindsey Stirling](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UQmlzOW-CLY) [](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UQmlzOW-CLY)  
> Lumity song: [Perfect cover by Alex G](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-AhIqpfmwU)


	10. Fields of Gold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's this? Another fluff-filled chapter? Who are you and what have you done with RainbowBuddy?!
> 
> Thank you so much for reading this far and I hope you all enjoy this chapter.
> 
> Please let me know what you think, I love and cherish every single comment I receive!

**34**

The winds of Autumn are capricious. They carry with them the last lingering caress of summer and whisper promises of the winter to come. They dance through treetops and whirl through banked up piles of leaves. They howl and hurl themselves against windows, battering them alongside the rain. They race down streets and through alleys, chuckling joyfully as they pick up litter to flutter - tap, tap, tap - down the road.

The winds of Autumn are mischievous. They flutter and twirl down the nearly deserted street. Like Puck, they tousle soft brown hair and tug on green locks. Impishly they play with the tasseled ends of woollen scarves and toy with heavy skirts.

The winds of Autumn send a shiver down the trio’s spines as the cool breeze rushes by them. The winds continue their journey, but not before attempting to steal words and breath out of the air; souvenirs for the impish gust to carry away.

“One… Two… Three!” On three, two arms strain as they swing a little girl between them, hefting her up into the air.

A tall woman with warm hazel eyes, dark skin and tousled brown hair glances over her squealing offspring at the woman holding the child’s other hand. Sparing her wife a warm smile, she looks down at the little girl between them.

“My gosh, you’re getting big, Mija! Soon, you’ll be too big for us to swing you like this.”

“Never!” The five-year-old is quick to assure her mami. She shakes her head vigorously, causing short green pigtails to whip back and forth about her face. “I’ll never be too big for swings!”

“Is that so?” Luz asks with a chuckle, “Well, in that case… One… Two… Three!” And on three, she and her wife again swing their arms, muscles screaming, as their little girl giggles and kicks her feet in the air.

The child’s other mother narrows golden eyes and sighs in relief as she spots salvation. “Azure,” she says softly, squeezing her daughter’s hand and pointing with a slender, pearly finger. “Look.”

Azure drops both their hands and is gone in a flash. Her amber eyes sparkle with mischief as she dives into the huge pile of raked up leaves sitting neatly on someone’s lawn. Luz winces as the pile explodes outwards in an impressive display of chaotic energy. Stepping closer to her wife, she bumps her playfully with her hip before taking Amity’s hand in hers. “I hope the homeowner doesn’t catch us.”

Amity smiles back, “If it gives our arms a rest, I will gladly take any scolding and blame it all on you.”

Luz places a hand on her chest, her face frozen in mimicry of shock, “You would blame me? You would blame your innocent and loving wife?” She cries out in faux offence.

Amity turns, places one finger on Luz’s chest and smirks. “In a heartbeat.” She says and skips teasingly out of reach when Luz predictably lunges after her.

The wind twists around them as they tussle, snatching their laughter and bringing it swiftly to their offspring’s ears. One pointed ear twitches and Azure looks up from the leafy destruction she has wrought upon the stranger’s manicured lawn. She turns to observe her parents through narrowed eyes. Picking herself up clumsily, she does her best to stalk towards them, running as stealthily as a five-year-old is able to. 

Amity makes eye contact with her daughter and merely smiles wider as the young child hurls herself at Luz’s legs. “Me too, Mami! Me too!”

Luz chuckles and picks the girl up, whirling her through the air to finally rest on her hip in a cuddle. “It looks to me like someone needs a visit from the… tickle monster!” She cries before unleashing a wave of tickles on the child. Peals of joyous giggles ring out as Azure wiggles and squirms. Finally she breaks free from her mami and, with a huge smile locked in place, rushes to peek back at her attacker from behind her mother’s legs.

“You can’t get me, I’m safe now!” She pokes her tongue out at Luz.

“Is that so?” Luz pauses before unleashing a devilish grin. “I guess, I’ll just have to get your mother then!” And she laughs as she lunges forward to tickle her wife. Amity laughs as she playfully fends off Luz’s advances and finally Luz just sweeps her up in her arms, spinning her around and planting a big kiss on perfect lips.

“Ew, yucky!”

Amity smiles at her daughter. “Oh, are kisses yucky then?”

“Yes. They’re gross!”

“I guess you won’t want any of our kisses then!” And together with Luz, they bundle the little girl up in a tangle of arms, peppering kisses all over her face and hair. Azure’s delighted squeal echoes off the houses all the way down to the end of the street.

The trio continue their jovial journey, laughing and in good spirits before finally reaching their destination. The house is small and somewhat worn down, but it is clean and tidy. It’s homely appearance is softened by the presence of low bushes in the yard. Behind the house, a friendly forest stretches gracefully to brush the grey canvas of the sky with splotches of reds and golds.

A sturdy, brown-skinned woman with rectangular browline glasses leans against the open door frame. Her arms are crossed and she wears comfortable jeans, a soft plain t-shirt, and a fond, exasperated smile.

“Mi hijas! Nieta!” She calls out to them.

Azure immediately wriggles free from her mother’s arms and drops to the ground, almost faceplanting before catching herself at the last second. She races up the steps and flings herself headfirst into Camila’s arms.

“Abuelita!” She cries and Camila chuckles as she sweeps the little girl into her arms. As Luz and Amity approach, the older woman reaches out and playfully pretends to cuff Luz’s ears.

“What did I do?”

“I think you’ve managed to wake the entire street with your rough housing.” Camila levels a stern look at her daughter before, relenting with a chuckle, she pulls her daughter and daughter-in-law into a big hug.

“Thank you so much for agreeing to watch Azure, Camila.” Amity says, placing a warm hand on the woman’s forearm.

“It is no trouble at all, mija. I’ll take any excuse to spend time with mi conejito!” Camila’s smile broadens suddenly. “Which reminds me, I have a gift for you.” She quickly hands off her fidgety grandchild to her daughter and disappears inside. She reappears, moments later with a small package wrapped in purple patterned fabric and tied up with string.

Azure’s eyes widen and she clasps her face in two tiny hands, “For me?” She asks in surprise.

Camila chuckles, “Yes, querida, for you.” She hands her the present.

“You spoil her, Mami.” Luz scolds playfully.

“The fabric is a scarf for your mom, nieta, so be gentle with it.”

“I will, Abuelita.” As gently as an over eager five-year-old can, Azure pulls the string and fabric away to reveal a purple furry face looking back at her. As Azure’s delighted screech echoes down the street, Amity adroitly steps forward to catch the scarf and string before the impish wind can snatch it away from them. Pocketing the string, she drapes the scarf around her neck appreciatively. She then steps in close to wrap her arms around Luz and Azure, resting her chin on Luz’s shoulder to peer down at the gift.

“Es un lindo conejito!” Azure cries.

Luz grins and bounces Azure on her hip. “Just. Like. You.” She says, joyously booping her daughter’s nose with each word.

“What do you think you will call them, cariña?” Amity asks.

Azure thinks for a moment and then grins back at her mother, “His name is Otabin!” 

Suddenly, the little girl remembers her manners. She quickly wrestles her way out of her mami’s arms again. Once free, she wraps her little arms around her grandmother and presses her face into the coarse fabric of the older woman’s denim jeans. “Muchas gracias, Abuelita. Me encanta!”

“De nada, conejito. I love to see your smile.” She places a hand on Azure’s shoulder. “Why don’t you go inside and show Otabin around the house.”

“Okay!” The little girl’s face lights up the sky and she runs into the house. From the doorway they can hear her loudly begin giving Otabin the grand tour. “And this is the living room, where Abuelita relaxes after a hard day’s work and watches her shows and over here is the kitchen…”

The three adults share a fond smile over her antics.

“Okay,” Amity says. “Luz, you have your cell phone so Cam can call us if she needs to?”

Luz frantically pats down her pockets before finding the phone in one of her back pockets. “Got it!” She cries, holding it up victoriously.

“And here are Eda’s and Willow’s cell phone numbers, just in case you can’t get a hold of us.”

“Si, si. No te preocupes mucho, por favor? I love having Azure come visit.” She lightly pushes the two women down the stairs and makes a shooing gesture at them from the top step. “You two concentrate on having a nice day today. Te quiero, mi hijas.”

“Te quiero, Mami.” Luz replies and then with one last glance past the woman barring entrance to the house containing their precious five-year-old, Luz takes Amity’s hand and gently pulls her away.

Amity looks down at the warm hand interwoven with her own and smiles serenely as she sends two quick pulses Luz’s way. _Te amo._ Luz’s lips quirk into their own smile as she returns the squeezes with her own. Amity tugs and Luz is drawn down into a chaste kiss against smiling lips. When Amity pulls away, Luz simply grins and tugs her close once more. She peppers Amity’s cheeks, lips and nose with kisses before attacking her neck with a soft and playful growl.

Amity’s silvery laugh rings out into the cool Autumn air and she pushes Luz away somewhat reluctantly. “Come on, silly. We’ll never get there if you don’t hurry up.”

“Ok, ok.” Luz smiles with a grin and, taking up Amity’s hand once more, she leads them both to their car.

***

The car ride is a short one. Their hands remain tangled together as they whip past cookie-cutter houses and lawns. Soon, they leave suburbia and are welcomed by the reds and yellows of the forest on their left and the rolling open expanse of fields on their right.

Eventually, Luz slows the car and pulls off the road, parking next to a rickety old gate. Exiting the car, she does not bother to lock it out here in the middle of nowhere. Nimbly, she puts one hand on the gate and vaults over it. She fudges the landing slightly as the gate shifts unexpectedly under her weight, but she manages to catch herself before falling. With a laugh, she turns and throws her body into a gymnast’s finish pose - legs tight together, back straight, head held high and arms outstretched to the sky in a Y shape.

Despite herself, a soft giggle escapes Amity’s lips. Shaking her head at the ridiculous woman she chose to marry, she says nothing and simply extends her hand. Luz takes it with a flourished bow and helps the shorter woman clamber over the gate.

Hand in hand, they make their way through the field towards a tree they can see on the horizon. The path they follow is narrow and well-beaten, and it meanders aimlessly through the field. As they walk, Luz and Amity are able to reach out with their empty hands to brush against the field’s flaxen glory. 

The wind has softened now. It carries the memory of summer as it frolics amongst the barley, causing rippling waves of gold as far as the eye can see. The shy sun emerges from behind gloomy clouds and Luz laughs joyously as brilliant rays of light rain down on them.

They halt in the shade of the tree and Amity casts a small spell circle before reaching in to retrieve a large picnic basket and blanket. She hands the blanket to Luz who flaps it open - almost catching Amity in the process, but she manages to flinch back from the sudden movement - before laying it out flat on the small hill they find themselves on.

Luz flops down to sprawl on the blanket with a large sigh. “I love it here.” She announces softly.

“Me too.” Amity quietly agrees, as she gracefully sits next to her, tucking her legs in under her skirt demurely. “It’s so peaceful.”

“It reminds me of our tree,” Luz admits. “Except nothing is trying to eat us here.”

Amity chuckles softly as she pulls out two plastic goblets and a bottle of wine. “I’ll always love our tree the most,” she agrees. “But this is certainly a close runner-up.”

Luz rolls on to her side and rests her head in her hand in her best ‘draw me like one of your French girls’ pose. With a sultry smile, she regards her wife who pinks prettily under her heavy gaze.

“Stop it.” Amity says.

Luz smirks. “I’m not doing anything.”

“You know exactly what you’re doing.”

“Do I?” 

“Yes.”

Luz grins and shifts her weight slowly, turning on to her front. She crawls fluidly across the blanket and props herself up on her arms to lean dangerously into Amity. 

“What, exactly, am I doing, mi amor?” She asks, her breath ghosting across Amity’s lips.

Amity’s own breath catches and her gaze flutters to Luz’s mouth. She closes her eyes and leans down, ever so slightly, and is startled when Luz’s head flops into her lap with a flump.

Luz’s uproarious laughter rings out across the field as Amity gently slaps her shoulder in jest. “Yeah, yeah. You’re absolutely hilarious.” Amity deadpans.

“I like to think so!” Luz beams as her wife frowns down at her. “I love how flustered you get, even now.”

“Hmmph.” Amity says and pushes Luz off her lap. She opens the wine and hands a glass to Luz with a wink. “Perhaps this will keep you out of trouble.”

“Not likely!”

Soon, their lunch has been consumed and the half empty wine bottle rests nearby, completely forgotten. Luz has returned her head to its pillow on Amity’s lap and Amity’s hand is absently carding through soft brown curls. Luz closes her eyes and hums in pleasure as sharp fingernails gently scratch at her scalp, sending tendrils of electricity down her spine. Warm, hazel eyes open and meet her wife’s loving, golden gaze.

Luz reaches up to where Amity’s hand rests against her chest and wraps her long fingers around Amity’s slender wrist. She marvels, not for the first time, at how her whole hand can encircle Amity’s tiny wrists. She loves holding her like this, feeling like she has all of her in her hand. She sees Amity’s soft smile at the touch and she gently taps her fingertips twice against the delicate skin.

Amity continues gently caressing Luz’s head, stroking her hair, and watching, bewitched, as the enchanting woman falls into a light doze. Amity isn’t sure how long they lie there, long enough for her legs to get stiff with pins and needles but, despite the discomfort, you couldn’t pay her to move. Not when she holds the world in her arms.

Eventually, Luz awakens from her light nap and sits up to stretch and yawn like a cat. Amity watches her for a moment, a gentle expression on her face. Then she experimentally stretches each leg out and winces as pain shoots up them. Seeing her wince, Luz leans over quickly and gently helps massage the blood back into Amity’s legs before pressing a soft kiss to her wife’s forehead.

Clumsily, she clambers to her feet and rummages through various pockets before emerging with her phone. Her tongue sticks out her mouth slightly as she frowns at the device, opening an app and scrolling through it until something catches her eye. With a mischievous glint in her eyes, she presses [ play ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=egkk079oZu0) and places the phone reverentially on the blanket before stepping away from Amity to stand before her in what she considers a classic boy band pose - arms crossed, leaning back slightly, head tilted on an angle.

She winks at Amity and sings along.

_Yea-yeah_

_You are my fire_ _  
__The one desire_ _  
__Believe when I say_ _  
__I want it that way_

_But we are two worlds apart_ _  
__Can't reach to your heart_ _  
__When you say_ _  
__That I want it that way_

With a devilish grin, she lunges forward and pulls Amity up to dance with her as she struts her stuff in time to the music.

_Tell me why_ _  
__Ain't nothin' but a heartache_ _  
__Tell me why_ _  
__Ain't nothin' but a mistake_ _  
__Tell me why_ _  
__I never wanna hear you say_ _  
__I want it that way_

Amity can’t help but laugh as the woman she has chosen to intertwine her life with swings her around the empty field. She loves human music, finds it exhilarating and new, thrilling in a way she can’t quite describe. And she loves dancing with Luz. Luz has always had something about her that just melts all of her inhibitions away, leaving her raw and vulnerable. Open. It’s terrifying and invigorating and even after all these years, she can’t quite believe how much she longs for it. There’s a tiny broken part of her that still thinks she should run from these feelings, from this _openness_ , but the rest of her is drawn to this feeling like a moth to a flame. She sometimes wonders if one day she will catch fire but she hasn’t yet. She knows that each passing year soothes that broken little girl inside her a little more. She knows that Luz is there with her to help stitch the pieces back together.

She wonders if, one day, maybe the cracks will all be repaired. She knows that, if she lets her, Luz will paint those broken pieces with love, much like the kintsugi pottery Camila showed her that one time. She knows that, if she lets her, Luz will hold her and cherish her and celebrate those pieces, not as broken, not as things to be fixed, but as things that Amity _survived._

Amity knows that she will let her.

As the music comes to an end, Amity swings around to catch Luz’s hands in hers. She draws her close and Luz leans down to press their foreheads together. Two pairs of eyes flutter shut, two mouths smile softly and meet reverentially, as though in prayer.

Another [ song ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4dXabQhT5c) begins and Luz gently draws Amity into a slow waltz. They move away from the tree, hearing the soft music’s gentle refrain echo around them. Barley brushes against hips and legs as they sway gracefully to the rhythm. Pressing their foreheads together once more, Luz whisper-sings the words she knows so well.

_So she took her love_ _  
__For to gaze awhile_ _  
__Upon the fields of barley_ _  
__In her arms she fell as her hair came down_ _  
__Among the fields of gold_

_Will you stay with me?_ _  
__Will you be my love?_ _  
__Among the fields of barley_  
 _We'll forget the sun in his jealous sky_ _  
_As we lie in fields of gold

Amity swallows the rest of the song’s words with a gentle kiss. The kiss is returned and lips glide delicately against one another.

The song ends, but the couple do not notice. They are too entwined and entranced in their own little world.

“Happy anniversary, mi amor.”

“You too, Luz.”

“Here’s to another ten amazing years.” Luz says, sealing her wish with a kiss.

***

The Autumnal wind has fled. In its wake, it leaves the still hush of early evening, the quiet anticipation of the setting sun as it paints the sky with every hue of the rainbow. Amity looks up and shakes her head with a rueful smile as the colours splashed across the vista remind her of the first time she saw a rainbow in the Human Realm. She had yelped and thrown herself at Luz, trying desperately to cover her eyes while the human had laughed and pushed her off, assuring her that all was well.

Seeing her love’s headshake, Luz squeezes her hand gently and raises an eyebrow in query.

“Just remembering old times.” She says, smiling wryly.

“Good times?”

Amity hesitates, mulling it over. “Funny times. Embarrassing times.”

The eyebrow remains askance.

She relents. “Rainbows.”

Amity frowns slightly when Luz bursts out laughing at the memory, but a smile still lingers in the curve of her lip. Then Amity smirks and hip checks her wife, before dashing off ahead of her. She turns back to laugh at her and is surprised when Luz tackles her around the waist, lifting her up into the air and spinning her around before effortlessly tossing her over her shoulder.

“Luuuuz!” Amity cries, playfully smacking Luz’s back with soft fists. “Put me down!”

“Nah, I think I like you where you are.” Luz says with a smirk.

“Weak nerd arms, my ass.” Amity scoffs under her breath. 

Luz’s grin grows even wider and, after a furtive check that they’re alone on the street, places one gentle smack on Amity’s bottom. “If you insist.” She says, wryly.

“Luz!”

They continue down the street, with Amity still held firmly in a fireman’s lift. At this stage, Amity has resigned herself to her fate and has an elbow propped on Luz’s back and is resting her head in her hand.

“Mija, we’re here!” Luz cries out as she kicks the front door of her mother’s house gently.

“MAMI!” A shriek emits forms somewhere in the house. They pause while they hear the surprising thunder caused by tiny feet and then the door bangs open. “Mam- Mami, why are you carrying Mom?”

Luz laughs and pats Amity on the bum again, “Oh this? Mom just got a little tired, is all.”

“Oh, is that all?” A familiar voice asks and Luz looks up in surprise to see a stocky witch with short dark hair leaning against the door frame.

“Willow!” Amity yelps and turns a violent shade of pink. She scrambles off her perch and whirls around to face their friend.

Willow is silent for a moment, studying the pair. Then she casts a small spell and summons a long, thin, white piece of card. She steps forward and holds it up next to Amity’s face. Willow squints slightly, eyeballing the list of colours on the card. 

“Wow, Amity!” She says with a smirk. “I think this might be a new record, you’ve made it all the way to ‘Feverish Magenta’! Your last effort only got as high as ‘Watermelon’s Delight’.”

“Willow! You promised you would retire the paint card joke!” Amity cries. Then she turns on the softly snickering Luz. “I wish you’d never introduced her and Gus to them in the first place!”

Luz gently wraps her arms around Amity, ignoring her flailing limbs. “Mi amor,” she says placatingly. “We only tease you because we love you so.” She presses a gentle kiss to the tip of Amity’s nose. “Besides, it could have been so much worse. We’ve never told Ed and Em about the cards!”

“And you never will.”

“And we never will.” Willow and Luz repeat solemnly, hands on hearts.

Azure has watched this exchange wide-eyed and mouth agape. She tugs on Willow’s dress and Willow obediently bends down to place her ear at child-level. “Aunty Willow, what’s a paint?”

“Next time I’m looking after you, Azure, I’ll make sure we have some paint to play with.”

“Speaking of,” says Amity, once she had managed to calm her complexion to a soft ‘Blushing Rose’. “How come you’re here?”

“Oh, there was a big crash on the highway apparently and Camila got called in to help. She asked if I minded stopping by to watch Azure instead.”

“You didn’t have to do that, we could have come back.”

“Nah,” says Willow. “We wanted you to finish your date. You two so rarely get time to yourselves these days, we wanted to do something nice for you.”

Amity thinks for a moment. “But tonight… Wasn’t tonight your big date too?”

Willow scoffs slightly, “Turns out my big date was a big flop, but hey, you win some you lose some.”

“Oh no. You’ll have to tell us all about it. Join us for dinner tonight.” Luz offers.

Willow hesitates. “I’d hate to be an intrusion.”

“You are never an intrusion.” Amity is quick to reassure her.

Together, the trio of witches gather up Azure’s belongings which have somehow become scattered through every single corner of the house. Luz manages to find belongings she wasn’t even sure they had brought with them. Azure helps the adults by running around, singing and dancing with Otabin and generally being underfoot.

***

“And _then_ she started going on and on about how much money she earns as a Peacekeeper and just... Wouldn’t. Stop. Talking. She kept going on about how she’s going to rise up through the ranks now that she’s ‘caught the Empress’s eye’ and how the Empress knows her name.”

“No!” Luz bursts out laughing, “Did you tell her you know Lilith and that she makes a point of learning the name of _every_ new recruit?”

“I couldn’t get a word in edgeways!”

Amity’s high chortle joins the mirth, but she tries to hide it behind a hand. “Surely she had some redeeming qualities.”

“I’m sure she does,” Willow admits. “They’re just not for me. So, no, I was quite glad when your mother rang.” She pats Luz on the hand. “She provided me with an acceptable reason to end the date early.”

Luz frowns slightly, “You know you’re allowed to just end the date, right? You don’t actually need a reason.”

“Ah yes, and you would know this from the wealth of experience you’ve gained from dating one person your entire life?”

Luz drapes an arm around Amity’s shoulders and pulls her in for a peck on the cheek, ”Hey! I think that’s a sign that I’m actually really good at dating, personally. I won on my very first try.”

Amity smirks. “Yes, you won. Even if it did take you two years to notice me.”

“Titan, those years were long.” Willow quips.

“Hey!” Amity says, picking up a paper napkin, scrunching it up and tossing it at the witch.

Willow catches it out of the air and tosses it easily into the bin across the kitchen. “Anyway, it’s getting late. I should probably be heading off.”

Luz and Amity escort their friend to the door and farewell her into the cool night air. Luz watches Willow’s quickly disappearing figure atop her staff for a moment before turning and pulling Amity into her arms. Leaning down, she presses a chaste kiss against tender lips.

“A good day, love?” She asks.

“Best day.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations:   
>  Es un lindo conejito! - It’s a cute little bunny rabbit!   
>  Muchas gracias, Abuelita. Me encanta! - Thank you very much, Granny! I love him!   
>  No te preocupes mucho, por favor? - Just don’t worry so much, all right?
> 
> Music:   
>  [ I Want It That Way ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=egkk079oZu0) cover by MAX, Alyson Stoner and Kurt Hugo Schneider   
>  [ Fields of Gold ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4dXabQhT5c&list=LLvJ51e0QH3_0F7WOlzDLIaQ&index=184) cover by Kina Grannis 
> 
> Thanks, as always, to Max for being my second pair of eyes on this!


	11. Can't Wait To Hold You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Important:** This chapter contains a heavy subject matter that may affect many readers. Please pay attention to the content warning within the chapter. There will be a summary at the end for readers who wish to skip to the End Notes.
> 
> This chapter has been a long time coming. Thank you for taking this journey with me. I really hope you like this chapter. 
> 
> It was a hard one to write and it will be a hard one to read.
> 
> But before all of that, enjoy some fluff.
> 
> Update 31/01: Added art.

**26**

Dark horses gather on the horizon. They stamp their hooves and champ their teeth while inky clouds billow and dance around them. With a roar, they race across the skies leaving devastation in their wake. Thunder clashes. Lightning flickers.

And rain falls.

It tumbles from the sky in a flurry of steam to embrace the rising mist and the two swirl about to create something wild, dangerous, and new.

The house on the hill withstands it all.

A woman stands vigil in the house, gazing out into the darkness. Warm, brown eyes trace the droplets as they fall, watches them splash against the sod to create bubbling pools of molten mud.

She sighs deeply and an arm darts out, somehow avoiding the scalding rain as she pulls the window shut with a resounding clack. The woman sighs again, louder, drawing out the sound. As she does so she casts a glance at her companion, ensconced firmly on the couch.

A solitary ear flick is her only reply.

The woman huffs in mild displeasure, jostling the bangs from her face. She swings her long arms aimlessly and slouches across the room.

She pauses near her companion, looking down at her and then shifts slowly to perch on the arm of the couch furthest from her. In a swift movement, she flops backwards so that her back hits the couch cushions with a whumph and her feet dangle gormlessly in the air.

With more care, she shuffles her way up the couch and plops her head carefully in the other woman’s lap. She gazes up at her partner, past the book she studiously continues to read, and smiles cheekily.

“Amity, I’m booored.”

Amity simply tuts, and turns a page. After a moment, she replies.

“So, go find something to do then.”

“I’m trying to,” Luz wheedles, “but she won’t stop reading!”

Amity lightly drops the book on her face.

Ignoring her wife’s splutters of outrage, she picks the book back up and continues reading as though nothing had happened.

After a few moments, Amity feels a soft nuzzling against her stomach and looks down once more. Taking a moment to mark her place, she sets her book aside and raises one perfectly manicured eyebrow in amusement at her wife.

Luz glances up at her and smiles, but swiftly returns her attention to Amity’s soft midsection. Chuckling slightly, she tugs at the fabric of Amity’s shirt and presses her lips to the pale white skin she finds there.

Suddenly, Amity and Luz both freeze. They stare at each other, eyes wide in amazement.

“Did you-”

“Was that-”

Luz leans forward and presses her cheek firmly against Amity’s abdomen and waits. There it was again. A soft flutter, followed by a harder thump.

“She kicked me!” Luz cries, ecstatic.

“You felt her this time?”

“I did!” They are both beaming now. “She kicked me in the face!”

“That’s amazing!”

“It’s all I’ve ever wanted in life!”

Smiling fiercely, boredom forgotten, Luz shifts and presses her ear to Amity’s stomach. “I can hear her heart beating. Well, I think so anyway.”

“Yeah?” Amity is gazing down at her fondly. Pale fingers reach out to card gently through tousled dark hair.

“Yeah. Either that or the ocean. Or indigestion.” Amity playfully taps the side of Luz’s head in retribution.

“What were you reading anyway?” Luz asks, letting herself sink even further into Amity’s lap.

Amity’s lip curves, “An old favourite.” She holds the book up so Luz can read the cover. Luz smiles fondly as she recognises the familiar style of book.

“I told you how it got to the point that I could spot a trashy lesbian mystery at 20 paces in the library, right?”

“Yes, you did.” Her lips quirked. “Several times, in fact.”

Turning her head to kiss the gentle curve by her head, Luz looks up at her with starry eyes, “Read to me?”

Luz chuckles as a faint blush blooms across her wife’s cheeks.

“Oh, _really?_ You must be at a good part then.”

The tips of Amity’s ears redden, “Hush you.” She says putting her hand over Luz’s face. With her other hand though, she fumbles with the book and opens it. Clearing her throat with an embarrassed cough, she begins reading, “Rebecca turned to stretch lazily against Catherine’s body, running both hands up and down her lover’s back…”

***

Amity was slightly trapped. At some point during the impromptu reading, she and Luz had shifted on the couch to cuddle and now her entire lower body was trapped under the weight of her snoring wife. 

Amity stifles a wry chuckle as she attempts to wrangle a tingling arm out from under Luz’s sleeping form and is able to reach the forgotten book where it lies, discarded on the floor. Clumsily, she picks it up one-handed and replaces the bookmark, before placing it carefully on the end table.

She smiles sweetly as she gazes at Luz’s relaxed face. Her arms are wrapped firmly around Amity’s waist and her brow is pressing gently into the swell at her midriff. Amity reaches a tentative hand down and smoothes Luz’s messy hair back from her face. She caresses her cheek and then presses her palm to her stomach.

Her smile widens and she gazes in wonder at this strange miracle.

There is a strange flutter, like butterfly wings. Gone in an instant. But then there is another and soon Amity is beaming, gazing rapturously at her own body in complete and total awe.

Brown fingers reach up and caress pale skin, holding the hand against that curve. Sleepy brown eyes meet wide golden ones and white teeth gleam against dark skin. “You’re growing a person.” She says.

Amity chuckles, “ _We’re_ growing a person.” She corrects her fondly.

Maintaining eye contact, Luz presses a delicate kiss to Amity’s skin. “I love you.” She murmurs quietly.

“Who are you talking to?” Amity laughs, “Me or the baby?”

Luz simply grins, “Yes.” And Amity’s laughter is like music to her ears.

Eventually Amity stretches uncomfortably and Luz quickly shifts her weight to her elbows. “Too heavy?” She asks.

“A little,” Amity admits.

“I’ll move,” Luz says, sitting up and pulling away from her, even as Amity mewls in protest. “I won’t go far.” She promises. Shifting her weight, she kneels by the couch and rests her chin on crossed arms as she gazes affectionately at the woman she is fortunate enough to share her life with.

Amity meets her gaze. “I still can’t believe we got to see her.”

Luz smiles, her eyes shining in the evening gloom.

“You don’t understand, Luz. We don’t do that here! That’s a different kind of magic.”

Luz reaches out and clasps Amity’s hand, squeezing gently. She squirms slightly and pulls a piece of paper from her pocket. Heavy creases point to the paper’s frequent handling. She unfolds it carefully and holds it where they both can see.

_“You don’t think they’ll notice anything strange about the baby, do you?”_

_“I mean, I hope not.” Luz said with a shrug, “We don’t know how human and witch anatomy will combine, whether there’ll be a bile sac or anything really.”_

_Amity’s face was even paler than usual and Luz quickly wrapped an arm about her wife’s shoulders. “Don’t worry. Mami called in a favour. Anything they find, they’ll run past her first and then we can clue in Viney back home and compare notes.”_

_“I’m just nervous.” Amity admitted. “It seems unnatural.”_

_“What does?”_

_“Seeing them before they arrive.”_

_“Amity, love, you are literally a witch who does magic. I don’t think using an ultrasound is all that unnatural. Comparatively speaking.”_

_Amity glared at her wife, “Magic is perfectly natural, I’ll have you-” But her tirade was interrupted when Luz pressed a soft kiss to her nose._

_“Boop.”_

_Amity blinked. “I can’t believe I married you.” She huffed slightly, but the hint of a smile tickled her lips._

_Luz squeezed her tighter, “It’s because you looooooove me.”_

_She tapped her fingers against Amity’s bare wrist. Two taps. “And I love you too.”_

_Amity sighed, and turned to press a gentle kiss against Luz’s neck._

_A door opened, “Mr and Mrs Noceda?”_

_Luz straightened and coughed loudly, “It’s Mrs and Mrs.” She said firmly, in a tone that brooked no argument._

_The ultrasound tech had the good grace to blush, “I’m so sorry! Um, please come through if you’re ready.”_

_Luz stood and helped Amity to her feet. Amity wobbled slightly as she rose, still not quite used to this strange new centre of balance she had. She smirked slightly at Luz’s concerned eyes._

_“Every time I get used to my new size, Baby goes and gets even bigger.” She said with a chuckle as she caressed the bump._

_Luz helped her up onto the bed and pulled up her shirt as the tech directed. With impersonal and cursory movements, he tugged her pants slightly lower and tucked a coarse white towel in against her skin. Amity exchanged a slightly surprised look with Luz, but the man was not done yet. Taking a bottle he held it over her stomach and then hesitated._

_“It’s cold,” he warned, before squirting a copious amount of pale blue liquid over her stomach. The liquid gooped slightly as it exited the bottle and Amity cringed. She could not help but be reminded of her Abomination magic and while she was very used to the mixture’s sticky consistency, having it on her stomach was not particularly pleasant for the fastidious witch._

_Catching her displeasure, Luz reached out and took Amity’s hand in hers, squeezing lightly. They turned their attention to the screen next to them while the man picked up his electronic wand and began pushing it firmly across Amity’s abdomen._

_Amity made a face. It wasn’t painful, exactly. But it was uncomfortable._

_“You remembered to drink and have a full bladder?” The man asked her._

_She blinked at the personal nature of the question, but nodded yes. That was half the reason this was so uncomfortable. The other half was the tiny, growing baby who was currently dancing on her bladder._

_“There we are!” The man announced triumphantly. Luz and Amity returned their attention to the screen and their jaws dropped simultaneously as they saw their child for the first time ever thanks to the magic of human technology._

_The black and white image flickered slightly, as though seen through twisting shadows while the baby pulled away from the pressure the wand exerted. The man raised his hand, “Let me just take a few measurements here, but look there’s the spine. And this here- come on, little one, move please, thaaat’s it. This here is your baby’s-”_

_“Face.” Luz interrupted, a euphoric expression on her own._

_“That’s right.” He said._

_Luz squeezed Amity’s hand, “Mi amor, that’s their_ face!” _But Amity couldn’t speak. Tears were streaming down her cheeks as she gazed in wonder at the tiny life inside her._

_The man averted his eyes politely, returning them to the screen. Without looking at them, he clicked a few buttons and took some more measurements before asking, “And are we finding out the sex today?”_

_Luz exchanged a look with Amity, who nodded. They had discussed this previously, but she still felt the need to check in before hearing the news._

_“Please.”_

_“Right, well. If your little one cooperates with me…” He moved the wand firmly against Amity’s stomach and she winced slightly as the device’s movements made the pressure in her bladder even more uncomfortable._

_He noticed her wince, “Let me know if it’s too painful or if you need the bathroom.”_

_He returned his attention to the screen and finally he smiled. Suddenly he looked like an actual person, rather than a simulacrum of one. “Congratulations, you two. You’re having a girl.”_

_Fresh tears pooled in Amity’s eyes and when she looked at her wife, she saw Luz blinking furiously in an attempt to hold her own waterworks at bay. The man looked at them for a moment before clicking a few buttons. The machine whirred and a piece of paper spooled out towards him. Taking it carefully, he handed it to them and they gazed at the photo in wonder ._

_As Luz reached out a trembling finger to trace their baby’s skull, the man cleared his throat. “I just need to step out and fetch some forms.” He winked, “I’ll give you two a minute to process the good news.”_

_Luz lost no time in half sliding onto the bed and wrapping her arms around her wife. Pressing a kiss to her temple, she murmured. “A baby girl.”_

_Amity looked up at her, beaming, before returning her delighted gaze to the photo._

_“Any ideas about names?” Luz asked._

_Amity opened her mouth to speak, but then was interrupted by something that required her urgent attention. “Hold that thought,” she said. “And point me towards the nearest bathroom!”_

Amity reaches out and brushes a finger against the photograph. “She’s so…” she frowns slightly as she searches for a word that will carry enough weight, before settling finally on, “precious.”

Luz nods. “I can’t wait to meet her.” Then she grins and leans down to Amity’s tummy, “You hear that, little one? We can’t wait to hold you.”

***

Amity lies back in her reclining chair and closes her eyes with a heavy sigh. Again, she feels that strange, exhilarating, wonderful flutter in her stomach. Without opening her eyes, she moves her hand to that spot and gently taps twice against the fullness she feels there. A smile bursts across her face as she feels an answering kick.

She sighs again and breathes slowly in an attempt to ease the nausea rising in her gut. She loves being pregnant, really she does, but she does have a few notes for whoever designed the concept. Morning sickness being the most pressing of them.

_Some people only have morning sickness for the first trimester... lucky Amity Blight though, no, she gets it for the whole damn thing._

There is another kick, almost as if in protest and Amity smiles again. _Worth every second_ , she thinks.

Closing her eyes once more, she tries to relax. Her ears twitch slightly as she hears the gentle patter and the answering hiss of the rain falling on the roof. She takes a deep breath in through her nose. She can smell the earthy petrichor drifting in through an open window. She can smell the delicate hints of citrus from her shampoo. She can smell burning.

Wait.

Her ears twitch again as there is a loud crash, a curse, and then a quickly spluttered, “I’m ok!”

Amity pauses for a moment while she debates the cost of pulling herself out of this chair versus the cost of whatever mayhem her wife is wreaking in the kitchen. Curiosity wins out in the end and Amity begins the slow process of heaving her bulky body out of its comfortable position. She grunts slightly and cradles the weight at her front as gravity works its uncomfortable magic on her unborn baby. 

Taking a moment to reorient to being upright, Amity then makes her way towards the kitchen. She isn’t waddling - yet - but it’s not exactly her normal gait either. It’s slower and more cautious, more aware of this new life growing inside her.

Amity pauses when she reaches the open kitchen door and takes a moment to just take it all in. She leans against the doorframe and clears her throat loudly.

Luz whirled at the sound, a cloud of white mist billowing around her. Flecks of flour coated her hair and face and mysterious stains were smeared across her shirt and trousers. Amity’s eyes traversed the similarly affected room.

She raised an eyebrow.

“I was trying to bake you cookies.” Luz said by way of explanation.

The eyebrow remained raised.

“And I may have burnt some of them.”

The eyebrows swapped positions.

“And the counter.”

Amity folded her arms and tried to look stern.

“But I’ll fix it.”

Finally, Amity spoke. “How did you manage to burn the cookies?”

Luz mumbled something under her breath.

“What was that?”

“I was trying to do a one-handed cartwheel.”

“Luz! Again, really?”

Luz chuckles slightly and raises a hand to ruffle the back of her head. “Er… I love you?”

Amity can’t help but laugh too. She steps into the room, carefully navigating around the mess as best she can and places both her hands on Luz’s shoulders. “I love you too.” She looks around the room, “But, by Titan, you’re a mess sometimes!”

“At least I’m a hot mess, right?” Luz says, chucking some finger guns Amity’s way.

Amity rolls her eyes and presses a chaste kiss to Luz’s cheek, doing her best to avoid the smudge of _something_ across her wife’s face. “Right.” She agrees.

She frowns slightly as she thinks of the Boiling Isles wet season, “But we’re really going to have to do something about all this energy of yours while we’re cooped up in here.”

Luz raises an eyebrow, “Got any ideas?”

“A few.” Amity purrs.

***

“When you said you had ideas for how to handle being stuck at home, I really didn’t think you meant go on holiday.”

Amity smirks at her wife coquettishly, “Why, whatever did you think I meant, Luz?”

Luz harrumphs and mutters under her breath good naturedly, “Not this.”

She peers out the windscreen at the countryside, normally so lush and verdant, but now sullen, sodden, and grey. Rain and wind lash the windows, wildly buffeting the car, rocking it from side to side. Luz’s knuckles whiten as her fingers tighten on the wheel and she guides the car back to safety.

“Is it much farther? I don’t like driving in this weather.”

Amity consults the map Camila had drawn them to her brother’s cabin. “Not too much further. This says the private road should be coming up soon on the left.”

Luz frowns in concentration, “I hope I don’t miss it in this squall.”

Amity places a reassuring hand on Luz’s arm, “Just slow down, we’re in no hurry.” She gestures to the world outside, “And it’s not like there’s anyone else on the road out here.”

“Thank Titan for that.” Luz murmurs. She’s not a confident driver at the best of times - she drives far too infrequently for that - and this is far from the best of times.

“There it is,” Amity says, pointing.

Luz indicates and they turn slowly off the main road. The car shudders and jolts as it shifts from the smooth asphalt to the loose gravel and Luz has to swerve to avoid a sudden pothole that appears out of the gloom.

They continue up the road in a juddery, but comfortable silence. Trees press close to the road, their branches swinging low to scrape the roof.

“I’m not gonna lie, mi amor, it kinda looks like you’re bringing me out here to kill me.”

“Like I’d take you somewhere special for that.” Amity turns to smile at her, golden eyes gleaming in the darkness. “You’ve really never been out here before.”

Luz shrugs and then realises that the tension of driving already had them up around her ears anyway. She breathes out slowly and consciously tries to relax them, easing them back to their normal position. “Maybe when I was little. Tio was bit… eccentric. Mami said he didn’t really like people much.”

“Well, that certainly explains the remote location.” Amity smiles at her wife, “Not that I’m complaining. It will be nice spending a week with you somewhere that isn’t our house!”

The car pulls to a stop next to a wooden cabin. It would be generous to call it rustic but the house looks surprisingly well-cared for and welcoming. Luz unbuckles her seatbelt before reaching into the back seat to grab a raincoat. She passes it to Amity and presses a soft kiss to her cheek. “You go on inside, I’ll get everything else.”

“You’re sure?”

She nods, “I’m sure.”

Amity opens the car door, turns sideways and carefully climbs out of the car. Taking care not to step in puddles or to slip on the wet gravel, she holds the raincoat over her head and makes her way to the house. She steps inside and is surprised to find that the cabin’s homely appearance belies its technological ability. Hoping that this model is similar to Camila’s, Amity flicks on the lights and turns on the heat pump. She takes a moment to relish the warm breeze before pulling the raincoat on properly and stepping outside once more. She pauses on the covered verandah, sheltered from the storm, to watch her wife who is struggling because she is attempting to carry every single piece of their luggage in one trip.

After attempting to juggle their bags for a few more minutes, Luz finally gives up, tosses some bags back into the car haphazardly before dashing over to cover. She’s pulled the collar of her flannel shirt up to cover her exposed neck but she is soaked. Her hair is drenched and pressed flat to her head but she is smiling and her brown eyes sparkle as she places the bags down carefully.

“You were supposed to go inside!” She calls over her shoulder as she dashes back to the car and almost falls over only twice.

She loads up quickly for the second trip and, holding the handle of one bag between her teeth momentarily, closes the car trunk and makes her perilous return. Mud has splashed all up her jeans and she can already feel her warm woolen socks squelching unpleasantly inside her combat boots. She smiles, thinking longingly of baths, hot cocoa, and bed, but Amity stops her with a pale hand on her wrist.

Obediently, Luz lowers the last of their belongings to the wooden deck and lookos questioningly at her wife.

Amity takes her hand and laces their fingers together before stepping out into the rain, drawing Luz after her. Her lip curves in amusement and she laughs as she feels the cold water run down her face and neck, feels it trickle slowly down her back.

“We don’t get to do this back home.” She says with a wink and pulls Luz in close.

Luz feels a bump against her belly and chuckles, “My old human school always told us we need to leave room for Jesus, apparently we need to leave room for Baby instead!”

Their heavy shod feet kick up mud as they twirl gracefully in the murky shade of the trees and even the roar of thunder and the constant tattoo of rain cannot drown out their laughter.

***

After their impromptu rain dance, Luz brooks no arguments before bundling Amity out of the rain and into the cabin. She finds some towels and wraps them tightly around her wife, ignoring Amity’s protests that she is fine. She locates the bathroom and begins filling the tub with warm water, the thunderous sound drowning out the weather outside.

Returning to the kitchen, she puts the kettle on and begins the task of seeking out mugs. While she waits for the kettle to boil, Luz starts bringing their luggage in from the porch and tidies away the food they have brought with them. After a quick look at what they have and the near empty pantry shells, she calls out to Amity across the open floor, “We’re going to need to do a grocery run in a day or two, we did not bring nearly enough food with us.”

Then, muttering to herself, she adds, “Although why I thought my reclusive and _deceased_ Tio’s cabin would have more food in it is really a question for another day.”

Amity pipes up from her bundle of blankets and waves Camila’s hand drawn map for emphasis, “It’s a good job your mother knows us so well. According to this, there’s a general store about a 15 minute drive away.”

Luz nods absently, “I can do us a grocery run in a day or two then.”

“Luz?”

“Mmhm?”

“The bath is still running.”

“Mierda!” Luz dashes off towards the bathroom again.

After carefully checking if the water temperature is safe enough for the baby, Luz returns to the lounge and simply bundles Amity up into her arms, towels and all. Amity splutters a sleepy protest, which Luz ignores, as she is carried into the bathroom.

“Luz, I don’t need a bath. I’m fine.”

“Woman, I will undress you myself.” Luz says with faux sternness. Then she smiles, “Please? I don’t want you catching a cold.”

Amity relents, “Alright. You’ll keep me company though?”

“Of course, I’ll be right back.”

While Amity disrobes and manoeuvres her bulky weight into the tub, Luz finishes making them hot drinks and collects Amity’s book from her bag. She carelessly shoves the paperback under her arm before scooping up the steaming mugs and returning to her wife.

Amity reclines in the bubbles in the low lit bathroom, a look of serene relaxation on her face. Her ears twitch as Luz enters the room. “I’ll admit it, you were right. This _was_ a good idea.”

“See? I have those sometimes.”

Luz shuts the door behind her and carefully puts her mug and the book on the floor. “Here you are, mi amor.”

“Hmm? Oh, that’s a very good idea too. Thank you.” Amity takes the hot cocoa in both hands and inhales the scent deeply.

Luz holds up her book, “Want me to read to you?”

Amity pinks slightly and nods, almost shyly.

Seating herself comfortably on the floor with her back up against the door, Luz opens the well-thumbed book, clears her throat and begins to read.

***

The next morning brings them relief in the form of weak light filtering through the stained glass windows of their temporary bedroom. Luz leaps out of bed, running to the window and throwing it open to inhale the clean, fresh air.

Amity watches her from amid a nest of blankets through lidded eyes, a fond smile crossing her features. “You’re like a little kid on Slithermas morning,” she comments with a jaw-wrenching yawn.

Luz turns back to her, eyes wide with excitement. She vibrates with contained energy, “But the rain has stopped! Can we go for a walk, Amity? Just a little one?”

Amity considers her tired and aching form, “If you can make breakfast happen, then absolutely.”

Luz manages to restrain her enthusiasm through the, to her at least, _agonisingly_ slow process of waking up and eating and Amity hides a smirk as she feels Luz’s knee jiggling next to hers at the kitchen table. Reaching out with one hand, while she continues eating her fried egg on toast with the other, she clamps her fingers firmly around Luz’s thigh and gives a gentle squeeze. Luz casts her a slightly abashed look and stills her shaking leg.

Soon, they are both wrapped up warmly and out the door. Luz gently tugs on Amity’s hand as she bounces while they walk. Amity gives her hand a loving squeeze, before letting their fingers slip apart. Her eyes meet Luz’s in permission and Luz is off in a flash. She spreads her arms wide like a child playing at flying and runs in a wide circle around her wife who watches her with fond amusement. Mud kicks up at Luz’s feet as she splashes through leaves and puddles and laughs just for the joy of it.

She returns to Amity, an aura of contentment flowing from every muscle in her body, and takes up her hand again.

“Dios mio,” she says, “I really needed that.”

“I could tell!” Amity agrees, laughing.

With their short walk concluded and a roaring fire in the grate, Luz and Amity sprawl out as best they can in front of the simple fireplace. The warmth washes over them as a casual game of Connect 4 turns into best two out of three and then best three out of five. Finally, Amity concedes defeat and insists they instead play Scrabble. Luz smirks knowingly at her competitive wife, but gets the board out.

The game is fairly well matched. At first. Things become a little heated however when Luz plays… That Word.

“Are you actually serious right now?”

Luz smirks at her, “Deadly.”

Amity mutters death threats under her breath as she dutifully tallies up the additional 22 points Luz scored with ‘HOOTY’.

Play continues and is only interrupted by a hot debate over Amity’s use of ‘ACCENDO’ which she insists is a common phrase on the Boiling Isles.

“Well, how come I’ve never heard it then?”

“Because I haven’t set you on fire… yet.”

“What?”

“What?”

The word is eventually allowed and play continues uninterrupted for a few more turns.

“No, Luz.”

“What? It’s a word.”

“It is not!”

“Is too!”

“Luz! There is no way on Titan that ‘CAZH’ is a word!”

“You’re just mad because it’ll win me the game.”

“I’m mad because it isn’t a word!”

“I’ll prove it!”

“How?”

“Google.” Luz finds her phone and after clicking for a few moments, triumphantly shoves the screen under Amity’s nose.

Amity’s eyebrows raise, “This is an Abomination and I hate it.”

Luz gives her a cocky grin, but quickly realises her error in gloating when she sees the beginning of a pout.

It takes lunch, two apologies, one cuddle session and an agreement that ‘of course, Amity is right, there’s no way CAZH should be a legal word in Scrabble’ before Amity forgives her enough to play more games.

They avoid Scrabble for the rest of the evening though.

***

Eventually, the impending lack of food can be put off no longer and Luz begins the slow process of warming the car engine up before she can head out. Shivering slightly, in the crisp morning air, she ducks back inside to collect her coat.

“Where do you think you’re going?” She asks her wife who is pulling on layer after layer of clothing. At this point, Amity looks more like a marshmallow than her wife.

“With you.”

“But there’s no need.”

“Luz, we both know you’ll forget something. Plus, I’m bored and,” she levels a look at her wife, “I’m perfectly capable of walking around a supermarket for 20 minutes.”

Luz sees the look in her eyes and decides that perhaps it’s best not to argue. Instead, she grabs a bunch of reusable bags and books it for the car.

The drive is peaceful. Weak sunlight streams through the trees, painting the road with pale dappled rays. Luz hums under her breath as they bounce along the rural track, doing her best to avoid potholes. Amity holds her stomach and attempts to limit the painful jiggling as much as she can.

The general store is tiny, but well stocked and they are able to find almost everything they want. Luz is a little disappointed by the choice of sugary breakfast cereals but she supposes she will just have to make do with the off brand Cocoa Peanut Butter Spheres! She’s just grateful they had alternative milk, even if it is soy.

It is as they are leaving the store that they feel the first splatters of rainfall. They make a dash for the car and gaze in awe and the menacing clouds now storming overhead.

“Why does it rain everywhere we go right now?”

The storm picks up intensity quickly. Already the 15 minute drive out to the store has stretched out to a 20 minute return and they appear no closer to home.

Luz peers desperately past the furious windscreen wipers into the murk, praying she will see their exit soon. She has already slowed the car to a crawl and, twice now, trucks have roared past them, horns blaring.Spray splashes up at the window as a third truck races past and their tiny car is buffeted by the turbulence it leaves in its wake.

Luz reaches out and fiddles with the A/C, trying to clear the condensation from her view. Amity is doing her best to help her keep look out for the private road, but the countryside is unfamiliar and she can barely see ten feet in front of the car anyway. Her eyes are caught by the looming forest on either side. Wind lashes through the trees, whipping branches into a frenzy and howling as though in protest at this cruel world.

Amity reaches out and rests a hand on Luz’s on the gear stick. She squeezes gently. Luz meets her eyes for a second and smiles, before returning her gaze to the road. Another truck roars past them and then suddenly, right in front of them, there is light.

A split second is all it takes.

A horn blares.

Brakes shriek.

Darkness blooms.

And then, except for the sound of one solitary wheel spinning wildly on its axis, there is silence.

Burning fills her nostrils.

Her vision blurs and darkens.

She can hear someone calling her name.

They are muffled. Distorted as though through water.

She tries to turn her head. 

To make sense of this new world.

But it is wrong.

There is a great weight on her chest. 

A bruising painful weight.

Her lungs burn.

A loose orange rolls across her vision.

It bounces, almost playfully, across the floor - no, the ceiling.

“Amity.”

“Amity!”

“AMITY!”

***

**CW:** Graphic portrayal of grief following a stillbirth.  
Please skip to the End Notes for a summary if you would rather not read.

Four weeks.

It has been four weeks and Luz still cannot wrap her head around it. She rubs absently at the ache on her chest where the seatbelt contusion remains purple and sore.

It is nothing compared to the ache in her heart.

The deep gut-wrenching ache that throbs through her body day and night.

Placing her hands on the kitchen counter, she rests her weight there. Her shoulders shake for a moment and then she straightens, picks up tonight’s reheated casserole and heads for the bedroom.

She pauses at the door, takes a deep breath and does her best to plaster a smile on across her face. Studying her expression in the hallway mirror, she takes stock. She looks pale, paler than she has ever looked, and the smile is wobbly. But it will have to do. Clinging tightly to the cracks in her facade, she opens the door.

“Hey, love…” She croons softly. “You should eat something.”

Amity sits in a large wingback chair, a blanket folded around her. Her hair lies lank and greasy against her head, her skin is grey and wan and her ears droop pitifully to the floor. Her golden eyes are closed but she opens them at the interruption and looks at Luz.

She does not see her.

There is no recognition in those eyes. No light, no spark. 

No love.

Luz kneels beside her chair. “Please, mi amor, eat something. Even just a little. For me.”

Amity does not answer. In her hands she clutches something ever tighter, bringing it to her heart and lowering her nose to nuzzle against its softness.

Luz tries to avoid looking at it.

Instead, her gaze roams the room. Her eyes fall on the crib, buried under dozens of bouquets and cards. And the pain in her chest throbs deeper.

“Mami and Eda came by again today.”

There is no response.

“They send their love.”

Nothing.

“Amity. Please.” She hates begging like this. But Luz doesn’t know what to do.

There’s no manual on how to survive something like this.

No guidebook on what to say or do.

She reaches up to take Amity’s hand, but she flinches away from her touch. Startled eyes stare into her for just a moment and then they return to the soft toy held to her chest. A pale hand begins stroking the brown fur and Luz thinks she hears something. But it is just a mumble, lost to the oppressive silence, to the slow infernal tick of the clock.

She sighs.

She doesn’t know what to do.

“Please eat.” She pleads, before picking up her own food and retreating.

She eats in the kitchen. Alone. As she has done every night since…

Luz runs the tap in the sink and plunges her hands into the soapy hot water. It is too hot but she doesn’t care. She prefers it.

Her shoulders shake once more and she bites back the sobs clawing at her throat, refusing to cry.

Light flashes.

And Luz jumps when thunder booms, rattling the windows.

Suddenly, for the first time in weeks, she hears a noise from upstairs. Footsteps crash down the stairs, through the hall and the door bangs open.

_Amity._

_No._

Luz races after her.

Amity stands in the swirling darkness. A teddy bear dangles by its arm from one hand, the other is clutched to her chest. Already, her thin nightgown clings to her body. The wind whips around her and she stumbles, trying to stand against it.

Red streaks mar white skin as boiling rain hits flesh.

It sizzles against her skin.

Amity does not cry out, does not make a sound. She merely crumples to the ground.

Luz does not even think. Plunging into the storm, she stifles a cry of pain as the first droplets strike her exposed skin.

It is indescribable.

How Amity is remaining silent, she will never know.

Reaching her, Luz hesitates. She kneels and scoops Amity into her arms but she lashes out at Luz, her fists beating against her chest.

"No!"

Rather than fight her, Luz gives up. Tears sting her eyes and mingle with the molten tracks of water burning her skin.

Ignoring the pain, she thrusts her hand into steaming mud and begins sketching a circle around her wife. She slaps the completed glyph and a golden arc springs into being above them.

The relative relief it brings is immense. Her flesh still burns, still crawls, still stings. But there is no additional pain and pressure.

Ignoring the sting, she pulls Amity into her arms. Fists and feet strike out at her once more but she simply pulls her in tight and holds.

Eventually, the thrashing subsides and a deep shuddering is left in its wake.

Luz smoothes back soaking hair to find Amity's face.

"What were you thinking?!" Her voice trembles with suppressed emotion.

"It doesn't matter."

"Doesn't matter?! You could have hurt yourself!" She grabs Amity's hand, pushes it's burnt flesh towards her face. "You _did_ hurt yourself!"

"I'm already hurting!"

Amity shakes Luz free from her wrist.

"But this is better."

"How can _this_ be better?!" Luz is trying hard to contain her fury, her fear, but she can feel it rolling away from her in waves of anguish.

"Because at least it's something! It's better than nothing! Better than you!"

Luz blinks at her. "Me?"

"It's like you don't even care!" Amity hesitates, aware, even in her rage, that she has crossed some invisible line.

"Luz-"

"OF COURSE I CARE!"

"But you don't- You haven't-"

"How can I, Amity? We can't both fall apart." Amity thought she could not be broken any further, but she was wrong. When she finally meets Luz's fierce gaze, the look she sees there destroys her utterly.

"Someone had to hold it together! Someone had to look after you! You fell apart, which meant I-" She chokes on her words and sobs, "which meant I couldn't."

"Luz-"

"It hurt so much, Amity. Every day."

For the first time in weeks, Amity hugs her back.

"I know." She says and her hand strokes, ever so gently, up and down her spine.

"I couldn't fall apart, couldn't cry." Tears mingle with snot to run down Luz face and soak Amity's shoulder. And Amity is crying now too, great juddering sobs that wracked through both their bodies.

"I was so scared- am so scared that if I start, I'll never stop."

Brown eyes linger for a moment on the teddy bear, forgotten now in the mud. 

Amity's gaze follows hers and they lean on each other in the sludge. 

"How are we meant to survive this?"

But neither one knows the answer to that.

Amity holds her sobbing wife in her arms and thinks of the weight she held there, just four weeks ago.

She wasn't sure if she wanted to hold her afterwards, to see her.

But a part of her needed to.

Amity looks into Luz's eyes and for a second sees a different pair of brown eyes, lifeless and cold.

"How are we supposed to survive losing Camile?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The final scene was written to Eric Clapton Tears in Heaven cover    
>  [ https://youtu.be/wGZOdfkMj1A ](https://youtu.be/wGZOdfkMj1A)
> 
> Thank you to Maxrimus for beta reading and to Imbadatnamingthings for helping me with content warnings.
> 
> **Summary:**  
>  Four weeks after the car crash, Luz and Amity are reeling from the death of their baby. Luz is desperately trying to hold everything together and Amity has just broken down, she barely speaks, eats, or sleeps.  
>  The first storm since the stillbirth affects them both deeply. Amity runs out into the boiling rain. Luz chases after and casts a glyph protection over them both.  
>  Amity is angry because she thinks Luz doesn’t care. Luz didn’t realise it but a part of her is angry with Amity because she feels like she has had to bottle everything up to take care of her.  
>  The chapter ends with Amity looking into Luz’s eyes and thinking of their daughter, Camile.


	12. Bubbles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m so stoked you all are continuing to read and enjoy this little story of mine. Please let me know what you think in the comments, I love each and every one I get!
> 
> Thanks, as always, to the wonderful Maxrimus for beta reading!

**25**

Light droplets of steaming rain tap dance across the roofs of Bonesborough. Here and there, people hurry amid the falling water, the glow of their shields casting golden light across alleys and stores.

The rain tumbles and twists as a gentle breeze plays on the streets. It floats lazily through town to bat at the old weathervane atop the tallest building and the rain joins in its play. Together the spring breeze and the soft rain flutter against the esteemed walls of Bonesborough Library but few of the occupants look up, all too engrossed in worlds of their own making.

In one hidden corner of the library, the sun’s gentle rays filter through the windows to illuminate a wide purple mat occupied by a small gaggle of children of every shape, species, and colour. Those with legs sit cross-legged with their backs erect. Every eye is pinned on the two women seated before them. Every ear is pricked with rapt attention. Several children begin to lean forward in anticipation as the story reaches its climax.

“Eat this, sucka!” A dark-skinned woman with a mop of unruly brown hair cries exuberantly, making several witchlings jump.

Her wife smiles at her, golden eyes warm with affection. “And that’s all we have time for today, children.”

There is a loud chorus of grumblings and moaning. One especially brave young soul, a red demon by the name of Praxus, cries out. “But you can’t end it there! What happens next?”

Luz grins and clambers clumsily to her feet. It is a long way down to young Praxus, but she laughs and scoops him into the air. “I guess you’ll just have to join us next week to find out.”

He grumbles for a second, but a giggle breaks free when Luz lightly tosses him into the air. She catches him easily and then, suddenly, a half dozen children are clamoring around her.

“It’s my turn!”

“No, Miss Luz, do me next!”

“You had your turn last time.”

Amity chuckles to herself as she watches her wife go down under an unruly pile of children, one hand appearing from within the dogpile and pleading for aid. Her eye is caught briefly by a gangly teenage demon, his red face covered with an unfortunate outbreak of acne. He waves shyly at her and she beams as she waves back at the demon as he waits for his little brother. Amity looks down when a small hand shyly touches hers.

A tiny cyclops witchling with pink skin and amber hair looks up at her with wide eyes, “Miss Amity, do you think they’re gonn’ kiss?”

“Azura and Hecate?”

“Yeah.”

“I absolutely think so.”

The little girl cheered before running away in search of her parents. Amity laughed when she heard her faint voice crying out through the shelves, “I  _ told _ you they’re gonn’ kiss!” Amity is unsurprised when she hears a susurrus of ‘shhh’s’ echo through the halls. The other librarians are surprisingly tolerant of the noise that comes from the Kid’s Corner, but the rest of the library is ruled over with an iron fist.

Returning her attention to her wife, Amity smiles as Luz manages to regain her feet. Her movement is slowed by the four children clinging to her limbs, but she is making a valiant effort to move towards the spawns’ waiting parents. The smiles on the tiny creatures’ faces are dwarfed by Luz’s beaming visage.

A thought lodges in Amity’s brain.

It is not a new thought, but she has been too shy to bring it up.

Too anxious.

_ She’s so good with children. _

Having deposited her various charges dutifully into the arms of their parents, Luz returns to her side and stoops to pick up her fallen book. She then slips a hand into Amity’s and squeezes her fingers gently. Two light pulses. Amity likes to imagine them blazing a trail from her fingers, up her arm and into her chest.

Without really thinking about it, she pulls on that arm, draws her closer. Luz smiles into her kiss, lips pressing against soft lips, and hums happily. She pulls back with a grin, her eyes on something just past Amity’s head and Amity blushes fiercely when she realises her unruly ears have given her away again. Slapping a hand over one of the traitorous appendages, she directs a  _ look _ at Luz.

“Shh you.”

Luz merely smirks, “I said nothing.” She mimes zipping her mouth shut and then locking it.

Amity rolls her eyes and playfully bumps her wife’s hip. Suddenly, she pauses. Glancing around furtively, Amity makes a decision and tugs Luz along in her confident wake. Luz grins as she realises where they are going.

They reach a familiar bookcase and, after ensuring they remain unobserved, Amity pulls on a book. Luz’s smile grows as she catches sight of the cover,  _ ‘The Lovers and The Secret Room’. _ There is an audible click, and as Amity returns the book to its resting place, the entire bookshelf pulls away to reveal a tiny room. Luz stoops her head slightly to duck into the room and as the shelf glides silently back into place, she turns and winks at Amity.

“What are we doing back-”

Amity halts her with a finger to her lips and, in perfect silence, draws a magenta spell circle in the air. Instantly, the sounds of the library outside are dulled, then muffled, and finally, silenced completely.

Luz waggles her eyebrows impishly, “A silencing spell, ay? Just what-”

She is cut off once again by lips crashing against hers. Amity wraps her arms around her and pushes her back against the wall. Luz is surprised for a moment but then she returns the kiss with equal fervour. She is uncertain what she did exactly to garner this response, at Amity’s work of all places, but she is certainly not about to complain about it.

Later, the two find themselves tangled together, lying half on the floor and half propped up on a beanbag. Luz is stroking Amity’s bronze locks back from her face and humming quietly to herself. The beanbag rustles noisily as Amity sighs and nuzzles in closer to Luz’s chest. Her own cheerful hum joins Luz’s and for a moment a soft harmony of contentment fills the room.

“Luz?”

“Mmm?” Luz looks down at her and meets wide, golden eyes shining with peaceful adoration.

“How do humans have children?”

And she feels herself freeze. Just for a second.

She hesitates. It’s not as if she hasn’t considered this before. She has. Many times over the years. But still, something about the moment thrills and terrifies her in a way she can’t quite explain. So she does what she always does in these situations. Plays it off as a joke.

“Well, when a mummy human and a daddy human love each other  _ very _ much, they… ”

“Amity thumps her lightly on the chest with a closed fist. “Yes, dear, you’re very funny.” Luz chuckles to herself, but Amity continues. “Now, can you be serious for five minutes?”

“Why so curious?”

Luz watches as shadows flicker across that golden gaze and she curses herself for it, curses her cowardice. Guiltily, she looks away. Casts her eyes about the room in a frantic attempt to find something, anything that might save this moment.

Firm white fingers catch her chin and hold it steady. Her head is tilted down and her eyes meet Amity’s once more.

“Why do you think?” Her voice is soft, tentative. It is an echo of her usual confident tones. “I love you, Luz.” She murmurs.

“I love you, too.”

“And I see you with the kids out there and… it’s all I want. It’s all I’ve ever wanted to have with you.”

She hesitates.

“I- I thought you wanted that too.”

“I do!” Luz blurts out. “I just- it’s scary.” Luz hangs her head, feels shame drip from every pore of her body, but the gentle fingers on her chin shift to caress her cheek.

“It  _ is _ scary.” Amity agrees. “I’m terrified.”

“You are?”

Amity chuckles, “It’s not as if I had the greatest parental role models growing up. What if- what if I end up like them?”

Luz’s arms tighten almost involuntarily around her wife, holding her tight to her chest. “You will  _ never _ end up like them. You hear me? You are  _ nothing  _ like them.” She presses a gentle kiss against luxurious locks, “You are wonderful.” Another kiss. “And magnificent.” And another. “And kind.” She peppers Amity’s brow with tiny kisses now, pausing between each peck to boast her wife’s qualities. “And beautiful and smart and loving and glorious.” Finally she tilts her head down, seeks and finds soft lips and presses a tender kiss to them, “and a fabulous kisser.” She concludes.

Tears shine in Amity’s eyes and she brushes them away impatiently. “I still don’t understand why you’re scared, Luz.” She admits.

Luz sighs and returns her hand to stroking through Amity’s hair, down over her shoulders and down her back. “Neither am I, if I’m honest. I know I want this. I know I want this with you, but taking that first step feels… really big somehow.” She presses another kiss to Amity’s hair, “But since when have I ever let a little thing like fear stop me?”

Amity smiles as her hug around Luz’s middle tightens.

“So… humans. Erm, basically you need sperm and an egg. Folks with penises provide the sperm and folks with a womb provide the eggs.”

She continues her explanation as best she can for quite some time. There is an alarming but quick detour while she attempts to explain to Amity the difference between an ova and an egg that is used for cooking. Amity interjects here and there asking for further clarification or to explore something Luz forgot.

“I take it’s not like that for witches, then?”

“...no.” Amity sits up in Luz’s arms slightly and clears her throat awkwardly. “Witches have a ritual that collects a little of their, well, their essence from within their bile sacs. They then draw that out and mix it with the essence of whomever else they want involved in the process.”

“How do babies happen then? Cause, like, I’m sure I’ve seen pregnant people here.” Luz asks, confused.

“Well, the combined essence is then cast into the womb of the witch wishing to be pregnant. That witch doesn’t even have to be related to the baby.” She frowns sourly, “We were all raised by Carriers.”

“Carriers?”

“Witch servants that the ‘elite’ would pay to bring their children to term. Often Carriers would then be employed as wetnurses and then as nannies.” She sighs and runs a frustrated hand through her hair. “It happens less often since the Uprising, but Carriers are still a thing especially for families who lack a womb. Lilith made some changes to the law though, that gives Carriers more rights and protections. I know-” She chokes on her words slightly. “I know that people were sometimes forced into it in the past.”

Luz tucks her hand into Amity’s and the touch grounds her. It pulls her away from the question that lingers in the back of her mind, away from the thought that haunts her when she thinks of the woman who practically raised her til she was seven before disappearing without a trace. 

“You don’t think-”

“I don’t think I’ll ever know for sure.”

Amity buries her face back in Luz’s chest and breathes in the sweet, earthy scent of her. She stays there until the silence between them grows warmer and softer once more.

Emerging from her safe cocoon, she meets Luz’s questioning gaze. “I’m alright,” she whispers before leaning up to kiss her.

Luz smiles. “So, to clarify. Witches make a magical spunk thing which they then mix up and magic into someone’s womb.”

“That’s basically it.”

“Damn.” Luz says. “You know, sometimes I forget that we’re completely different species.”

Amity laughs.

“But, wait. Does that mean you don’t have to have sex to have children?”

“Nope.” Amity says, make the ‘p’ sound pop.

“But, what’s the point of sex then?”

Amity gives Luz a flat stare. “Luz. Did you really just ask me that?”

A faint rosy hue grows at the base of Luz’s neck at floods up to flush her face and cheeks. Amity simply chuckles at her embarrassment before she relents and continues, “Witches don’t  _ have  _ to have sex to have children, but they can.” Luz notes with interest that Amity is now blushing faintly. “The essence gathering and emerging can sometimes occur naturally.”

“During sex.”

“Well, yes. But it’s not just sex. It’s more about intimacy and connection, really. I mean, that’s what scholars think but no one is  _ really _ sure. Natural occurrence is really, really rare and it’s kind of treated like a bit of a taboo topic.”

“How come?” Luz asks, her intelligent brown eyes wide with interest.

“Well- I mean, it’s embarrassing for one thing. And for another, it’s… well, when you haven’t prepared for it, it’s kind of messy.”

Luz stares at her. “How messy are we talking here?”

***

“So this is it, right?”

“I think so.”

“We’re really doing this. We’re really going to try and make a baby.” Excitement tinges Luz’s words, overriding the lingering remnants of fear she still feels.

“So all we have to do is find a glyph for it!”

Amity snorts. “ _ All. _ Luz, we don’t even know if there  _ is  _ a glyph. Or, if there is, if it will work for humans.”

Luz waves away Amity’s concerns with a carefree hand. They are sitting on the bed in their large room at home. The room is lit by a handful of light glyphs floating about the room and the soft glow of a rosy sunset streams in to join their illumination.

“We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it, amor.”

“I still don’t understand that saying.”

Luz chuckles, “I just mean we’ll deal with that problem  _ if _ it turns up. For now, let’s just try this.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

Amity nods. “Yep, okay.”

“Okay!” Luz grins. “Essence it up!”

Amity smirks and rolls her eyes, “How romantic.” But she obediently begins casting a spell circle. “I’ve never cast this spell before, so…” She trails off as a soft, silver glow builds in her chest. She flicks her hand and something emerges from over her heart. A clear line of glowing liquid trickles out to float in the air and Amity picks up the bowl she had prepared earlier. Another flick of her wrist and the creamy, white mixture drops into the bowl with an audible gloop.

Luz watches, fascinated. “That’s kind of gross.”

Amity shrugs. “I told you it was messy.”

Luz reaches out, then hesitates. “Can I touch it?”

Amity blushes furiously. The idea feels so  _ intimate _ , so vulnerable. But… it’s Luz.

She nods.

A tentative brown finger pokes into the liquid and Luz stifles a gasp. “It’s warm!”

A chuckle bursts from Amity’s lips, “You expected it to be cold?”

“I don’t know what I expected, really.” Luz said, running the mixture through her fingers and playing with the tacky substance. She grins suddenly, “Hey, Amity. Know what this reminds me of?”

“No…?” Amity says, cautiously.

Luz stretches out both arms in front of her and pokes her tongue out her mouth. “Gaaaah, I’m an abomination!” In her exuberance, she flicks her fingers and some of the stringy substance flies off and lands on Amity who recoils with a startled cry.

“Gross, Luz.”

“Hey, it’s your essence, babe.”

Amity shoots her an unamused look, while grabbing a tissue to dab at the offending stain. “So, do you think you can find a glyph in that?”

Luz grinned, “I can certainly try!”

And they do try. They try for several hours, but their labours are unsuccessful.

The next morning, Luz drags an exhausted Amity out of bed for coffee and breakfast at their favourite cafe. Once seated at their usual table, Luz eyes Amity over the top of her coffee suspiciously.

“You seem even more tired than usual.”

“... yeah. Doing the- erm, that spell took a lot more out of me than I expected.”

“Yeah, it did.” Luz cracks.

Amity glares at her but Luz can see her lip twitch in involuntary amusement and she beams happily. 

They sip their drinks in comfortable companionship for a moment. Then...

“So, have you ever… you know, done it naturally?”

Amity almost spits out her drink. She flushes bright pink and glances around the room. “Luz! You can’t just ask me that while we’re in public!”

Luz looks at her with wide, sparkling eyes and pouts apologetically.

Amity sighs, and reluctantly answers. “But if you must know, yes.”

“OhmyGod! When? Was it with me? Or were you by yourself? Or-” A shadow flickered across Luz’s face. “It wasn’t- it wasn’t with someone else, was it?”

“Of course not! Why the Titan would you think that? Who would it even be?”

Luz looked down, staring into her coffee as if it would answer for her. “Well, I just… I don’t understand why you hadn’t told me about this before now…”

Amity reaches across the table to grasp Luz’s hand. “I’m sorry.” She sighs. “It’s kind of hard to talk about this stuff. Even with you. You know how I was raised, this wasn’t exactly appropriate dinner conversation. We were taught not to talk about it.”

Luz nodded her understanding.

“But, look, I was with you and I want to tell you about it, but can we please talk about it later? In private.”

Two plates, laden with food, slam on to the table in front of them, causing them both to jump. Luz smiles and gently squeezes Amity’s hand twice.

“Of course, mi amor.”

***

“Sooooo...” Luz waggles her eyebrows suggestively at her wife. “We’re alone now.”

Amity pinks and mentally curses her fair complexion and she feels the heat bloom across her face. But she nods. “Okay.”

“So, you were with me, and…then what happened?”

“Right, I was with you and-”

“Wait, if you with me… how come I didn’t notice?”

_ Because you’re very oblivious. _ Amity thinks to herself. Aloud, she replies, “Because I went to the bathroom as soon as I realised what was happening.”

“Oh. That makes sense.” Luz murmured. “Because you were embarrassed.”

Amity didn’t think it was possible to get any pinker, but apparently she was wrong. “Yes,” she mumbled, “because I was embarrassed.” Steeling herself, she looked Luz dead in the eye. “Shall I continue?”

Luz pinked too. “Oh, yes. Please. Sorry.”

“So we were together and-”

“Was it the first time we had sex?” Luz blurts out.

“What? No. It was-”

“Ooo, or was it the first time we kissed?”

“Luz! Do you want me to tell you or not?”

“Yes, I do! I’m sorry, I just got excited.” Luz sits back on her heels on the bed but Amity can see her buzzing with excitement. She can see Luz’s lips trembling with the urge to stay silent. She sighs and waves a hand in permission. “Can I have one more guess?”

Amity’s face drops into a long-suffering expression.

“Was it when we got married?”

“It was the first time you told me you love me, okay!” Amity chokes out exasperatedly.

Luz pauses, thinking about it. “... but the first time I said I love you was after our first kiss.”

Amity shook her head. “No,” She says, “I mean the first time you said it properly. The first time you told me te amo.”

Brown eyes fill with heartfelt tears and a hand reaches blindly for another. They intertwine, squeeze and then a soft kiss is bestowed against pale, white fingers.

“Es casi imposible expresar cuánto te amo, Amity.”

“Luz, quiero que sepas cuánto te amo.”

Luz leans in and kisses her with such sweetness that Amity feels herself start to swoon. 

“I do.”

***

Brown eyes meet golden ones as a hesitant finger is brought down on the glyph. Then, Luz freezes as a warmth shoots up her arm and into her chest. She gasps at the speed of it, the intensity. And then that warmth is spreading, flooding through her limbs and turning them to jelly. She returns her surprised gaze to Amity, who is watching her with a knowing smile toying at her lips. 

The warmth increases. It begins to burn hotter, and hotter. But it is not painful. Not really. It is a building and suddenly that same glowing essence she has now seen from Amity so many times bursts forth from her chest. She gasps again as it leaves and Amity is quick to catch the goopy substance in a bowl before it falls to the bedspread.

They stare at each other in shocked silence for a moment.

“We did it.”

“We did it!”

“Amity! We did it!” Luz cheers and throws her arms around Amity who hastens to move the bowl away from her boisterous wife.

“We can make a baby, Luz.” Amity whispers into her shoulder. Suddenly, tears spring to her eyes and she is sobbing.

“Hey, hey now.” Luz pats her back in slow comforting circles. She leans back slightly to peer down at her, “I thought this was a good thing.”

“It is,” Amity chokes out between sobs.

“These are happy tears?”

Amity nods vigorously and Luz wastes no time in kissing the salt away. Eventually, Amity pulls away and casts her own spell. Luz snatches up the bowl, causing the contents to slosh slightly, and Amity deposits her own contribution into it.

Luz pauses for a moment, “How do we mix it? Like, do I get a spoon or something?”

Amity rolls her eyes at her and with a tiny flick of her finger the mixture twists and swirls within the bowl. Then she draws another spell circle and the mixture rises into the air and glides down Amity’s body, between her legs and Luz’s eyes widen in astonishment as she realises exactly  _ how _ the mixture journeys to the womb.

Amity gasps slightly as it settles into place and the glow within her tummy subsides. She blinks away the water at the corners of her eyes and meets Luz’s beaming intensity.

“Luz, you know this rarely works the first time, right? Sometimes it can take months, even years, to conceive a baby.”

Luz nodded. Then she smiles dangerously. “Next time, I want to put it there.”

Amity squints at her for a second. “Luz, there isn’t a glyph for that.”

Luz shrugs, undeterred. “Then we can do it the way humans do it.”

“But you told me humans do it-”

Luz quickly interrupts her, “I mean, the way humans who can’t do it that way, do it.”

“Oh.” Amity is silent for a moment as she ponders this idea. “How  _ do _ humans do it when they can’t, you know,  _ do it _ .”

“... I think a turkey baster is involved? Maybe?”

“You don’t know?!”

Luz shrugs again, this time helplessly. “I never had to know before! But, look, it’s fine. Mami will know. We can ask her.”

Amity nods, but then she asks, “What’s a turkey baster?”

“Um…”

One agonisingly awkward phone call with her mother later, Luz and Amity hung up the phone. Amity’s eyes were wide as she gazed at Luz.

“What’s a syringe?”

***

The next day finds Amity anxiously watching the clock in the main hall of the library. The hands tick, tick, tick round the clock and she thinks she can feel each tick stabbing further into her mind as she glares at them, silently willing them to speed up.  _ I just need to get through the next half hour, the next 15 minutes, the next 5 minutes.  _ She thinks to herself. 

Luz should be home by now. Returned from her supply run to the human world.

Amity bounces on her heels as she feels excitement flood her skin. A smile bursts its way onto her face and as soon as the first boom of the clock bell rings in the air, she is gone, racing towards home, her wife, and their future.

“Luz?” Amity’s voice echoes around the empty hallway as she pushes the front door open.

A smile lights her face when she sees the softly glowing orbs dancing in the air. Their golden glow gently illuminates petals, dozens of them. No, hundreds. Pink petals strewn in a river leading up the stairs.

Amity’s smile grows as she follows them.

When she reaches the top of the stairs, she shrieks. Luz sweeps out of the darkness without warning to scoop her up into her arms.

“Luz!” She laughs and kicks out slightly, “Put me down!”

“Nope! I’m being romantic.” Luz smiles and leans down to nuzzle her nose against Amity’s. “And you,” She presses a gentle kiss to the tip of her nose, “are going to let me.”

Amity giggles into Luz’s neck as she stumbles in the doorway to their room and fumbles with the door handle.

“Shh, you!” She manages to turn the handle, “Ah, success!” She kicked the door open and it banged against the wall.

Luz carefully lowers her wife to the bed and trails kisses down her neck.

Amity laughs and squirms under her, “This really isn’t necessary, Luz.”

“I think it’s very necessary.” Luz nibbles delicately at the pale neck beneath her, eliciting a slight gasp.

“You’re ridiculous.” But Amity’s hands stroke through dark curls and hold Luz’s head to her neck.

Luz murmurs into her new home, “Hago cosas ridículas porque te amo.”

“Con cada palabra que dices te amo más.” Amity leans down to kiss Luz’s temple.

“Te amo más.”

Then Amity grins and pushes Luz away from her. She raises her hand to cast the spell, but Luz catches it gently in hers and kisses it. “Put that away, you won’t be needing it.”

“Luz, it’s really rare for-”

“Amity. I wanna try. I love you so much, let me do this.” She leans down to press a heavenly kiss against luscious lips and pale fingers tangle and bunch in her shirt collar, pulling her closer.

Luz chuckles and pulls away, moving to stand back from the bed. Amity props herself up on her elbows and watches her quizzically. Her wife picks up the guitar in the corner and softly begins to  [ play ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UIk1RY_sS60) .

Her low husky voice rings out in the quiet room and the light glyphs overhead dance to the tune she gently strums. Amity smiles and tears spring to her eyes as she recognises the song.

_ Cruzare los montes,   
Los ríos, los valles   
Por irte a encontrar   
Salvaría tormentas, ciclones, dragones   
Sin exagerar   
Por poder mirarme en tus ojos bonitos   
Y vivir la gloria de estar a tu lado _

Luz walks slowly towards the bed, her eyes burning with a fire only Amity gets to see, and she sits next to the woman she loves more than any other. Amity quickly shifts to press up against Luz’s back and wraps her arms around her shoulders as she continues to play.

_ Porque en mí ya siento que te necesito   
Que me he enamorado   
Por poder mirarme en tus ojos bonitos   
Y vivir la gloria de estar a tu lado   
Porque en mí ya siento que te necesito   
Eso y más haré _

Amity tucks her head in against Luz and smiles softly as her high, lilting voice rushes into the air to twirl around Luz’s sweet contralto.

_ Por asegurar la sonrisa de tu alma   
Buscando equidad   
Yo podría empeñar lo más caro   
Que tengo que es mi libertad   
Y sería un honor, ay amor ser tu esclavo   
Sería tu juguete por mi voluntad _

Amity feels a familiar warmth begin to grow in her chest and she tucks her head in against Luz’s neck, hiding her blushing face. Her voice is muffled but she continues to sing and her arms tighten, almost involuntarily, around Luz’s sturdy frame.

_ Y si un día glorioso en tus brazos acabo   
Que felicidad   
Si, sería un honor, ay amor, ser tu esclavo   
Sería tu juguete por mi voluntad   
Y si un día glorioso en tus brazos acabo   
Que felicidad _

Amity gasps as the song concludes and Luz sets aside her guitar to turn and kiss her fervently. The warmth in her chest continues to build, and grow, and then there is release and she feels her heart leak from her chest. Luz kisses her tenderly and scoops up a bowl to catch her wife’s essence.

They pause for a moment, their foreheads pressed against each other as they breathe the same air. Then Amity tilts her head forwards and kisses Luz. Luz shifts away slightly, but is only to unbutton her shirt. Amity’s hands shake slightly as she rushes to help this endeavour and she smiles against Luz’s lips as she pushes the coarse fabric down, over her shoulders.

Luz draws back long enough to capture a breath and grins. She takes Amity’s hand in hers and brings it to her stomach. Together their hands travel up her body over dips and curves and then they pause, hovering just below Luz’s clavicle. Amity glances down and a bark of laughter breaks free when she sees the creation glyph painstakingly drawn in silver on her wife’s dark skin.

Brown eyes capture gold ones and hold them ever so gently as, together, their hands press down on silken skin. Heat trails up Luz’s arms from their tangled fingers and blossoms in her chest. A gasp breaks forth as the heat intensifies. Luz shifts her hands to grip Amity’s forearms tightly and she presses her forehead against the other woman’s. Her breaths come in deep pants and Amity watches, fascinated, as the glow paints Luz’s chest with light. The light brightens and then flows out of her and Luz shudders and gasps as it does, her hands tightening on Amity. A pale finger twirls a circle and the liquid is collected in the bowl and stirred gently.

Luz draws back from her wife with a smile and kisses her chastely, sweetly. “Whoa.” She whispers into her mouth.

“Whoa.” Amity echoes back.

Her wife pulls away from her once more and tries awkwardly to pull something out of her pocket. Finally, she gives in and stands up so she can more easily retrieve it and she holds up a syringe with a small ‘ha’ of triumph. Fumbling slightly, she removes the packaging and lowers the needle-less tube to their combined essence. The syringe makes a slight slurping sound as it sucks up the goop.

Luz then holds the syringe to eye level and examines it. She taps the plastic cylinder with her finger in an attempt to disperse the clumps of air, before pushing the plunger up slowly in an attempt to remove it.

A shocked whoof of air expresses from Luz’s lips as she stares at the syringe in amazement. Amity’s eyes meet hers and they both erupt in laughter as tiny bubbles of clear, white liquid emit from the tip.

“Bubbles.” Luz says and they both spasm as peals of laughter race through them.

Eventually, they still and Luz moves towards her. “You ready?”

Amity meets her steady gaze and nods.

She is surprised by the sensation. It’s not… pleasant, exactly, but nor is it unpleasant. It’s just a new experience, one she gets to share with Luz. Amity reaches out to gently caress Luz’s face. She trails a finger across her brow and traces down her nose to gambol across the curve of her smile.

Luz grins at her and waggles her eyebrows, “You know, humans have a way to improve conception rates.”

Amity smirks at her, raising a manicured brow. “Oh, you do, do you?”

“Yep,” said Luz, lowering herself to cover Amity’s body with her own. Their lips meet and they sigh in mutual happiness.

“I suppose we could try that,” Amity says with a wink.

“I suppose we could.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Translations**  
>  “Luz, quiero que sepas realmente cuánto te amo.” - Luz, I want you to know how much I love you.  
> “Es casi imposible expresar cuánto te amo, Amity.” - It's almost impossible to express how much I love you, Amity.  
> “Te amo más” - I love you more.  
> “Con cada palabra que dices te amo siempre más.” - With every word you say, I love you more.  
> "Hago cosas ridículas porque te amo.” - I'm ridiculous because I love you.  
> 
> 
> And this is the English translation of the song Luz serenades Amity with:
> 
> This, this I feel for you   
> I will go across the mounts  
> The rivers and valleys  
> In order to meet with you  
> I would face storms, cyclones and dragons  
> It's not an overstatement  
> Just so I could see myself reflected on your pretty eyes  
> And bask in the glory of living by your side  
> Because within me, I feel that I need you  
> That I have fallen in love  
> Just so I could see myself reflected on your pretty eyes  
> And bask in the glory of living by your side  
> Because within me, I feel that I need you  
> That and more I will do
> 
> So that I can guarantee your soul's smile  
> While seeking equity  
> I can even sacrifice the most valuable thing I have,  
> That being my freedom  
> And it would be an honor, oh love, to be your slave  
> I would become your toy by my own will  
> And if a glorious day I end up in your arms  
> That would be happiness  
> Yes, it would be an honor, oh love, to be your slave  
> I would become your toy by my own will  
> And if a glorious day I end up in your arms  
> That would be happiness


	13. Appendix i: Noceda Family Tree

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Noceda Family Tree.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to nerdylilwriter for the suggestion of putting in a family tree to help people navigate this story as we float backwards through the years.

I may update this again in the future with some small descriptions of OC appearances or with some tiny drawings if I find time, energy or someone with artistic ability *looks hopefully at wife*

Thanks, as always, for reading and I hope you'll join me for the next chapter next week!


	14. Appendix ii: Artwork

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I started doing artwork to accompany the story, so it will all be compiled here as well as in each relevant chapter. I may even post artwork sneak peeks ahead of chapters if I can find the motivation.
> 
> Not every chapter will have some art, just the ones that give me a good idea for a drawing.

**2\. Wedding at Sunset**

****

**3\. Amity and the Abomination**

This was used as a [reference](https://kelpls.tumblr.com/post/73698778883/practicing-drawing-some-waltzes-with-a-couple-of) image.

**6\. Vox the Palisman**

**9\. Luz and Amity, May I Have This Dance?**

Check out this beautiful commission by Marimo. You can see more of her wonderful art on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/MarimoJenn).

**11\. Can't Wait To Meet You**

****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't drawn in many, many years, so I'd love constructive criticism. I'm quite proud of myself given how long it's been since I've done any artwork!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I would love any feedback or comments you have to give! It's been forever since I've done this, so you have my full permission to be incredibly gentle and kind and compassionate XD


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